Social services onto me about not having child in nursery! Advice needed

POPPYOSCAR

lozzy88 wrote: »

I am 24 and for some reason I never went to nursery, and this resulted in me being painfully shy until I was about 12. Am not saying this will happen to the op`s child but its something to bare in mind.

I was the youngest of 7 children so it wasn't like I was a only child, my parents also had lots of friends with kids my age and we all got together but I would always be the little weirdo sat in the corner or clinging to a parent.

Of course I could of went to nursery and I still could of been shy but we`ll never know lol.

My HV is a bit pushy about visits I just think if you come to me I will make the effort to be in but am not coming to you.

My daughter was also painfully shy.

However, I did send her to nursery/playgroup but this made no difference, she was still just as shy when she started school.

She was very lucky that when she did start school she had one teacher that was absolutely fantastic with her. This particular teacher was very quiet and had the patience of a saint.

When that teacher left the school I bought her a special present and she cried when she came out to thank me.

So in my case it was more of the case of a brilliant teacher rather than attending nursery that helped my daughter.

shirlgirl2004

poet123 wrote: »

Because school is still the norm, and it is natural to assume most children will attend?

So because people like to make assumptions? Well if you're going to give advice it's generally not wise to make assumptions and work on facts.

Mojisola

shirlgirl2004 wrote: »

No but OP didn't mention school either. Why do people make assumptions?

Because school is the norm and if people are going to do something different, they usually say so.

Snoopinggoose would have had different advice if she had said "HV is worried that LO isn't going to nursery but I'm going to be home-schooling so there's no reason for her to go".

We have to make assumptions to answer queries because we don't know people personally.

There have been enough posts saying that the LO might benefit from nursery before school for Snoopinggoose to correct us if our assumptions are wrong.

POPPYOSCAR

shirlgirl2004 wrote: »

So because people like to make assumptions? Well if you're going to give advice it's generally not wise to make assumptions and work on facts.

This is the problem I have with this thread.

Assumptions being made all the time and a no smoke without fire attitude.

Not many are willing to accept that this may just possibly be down to the attitude of the HV.

poet123

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

This is the problem I have with this thread.

Assumptions being made all the time and a no smoke without fire attitude.

Not many are willing to accept that this may just possibly be down to the attitude of the HV.

I think it would have been much more of an assumption to have answered on the basis that the OP would be home schooling, given the % of children who are home schooled.

POPPYOSCAR

poet123 wrote: »

I think it would have been much more of an assumption to have answered on the basis that the OP would be home schooling, given the % of children who are home schooled.

Agreed.

But why make any assumptions at all?

Why not answer the OP 's questions that she posed?

If she intends to home school or send her child to school it is irrelevant.

She made it quite clear that she did not wish to send her child to nursery and did not ask for any advice in that respect.

poet123

shirlgirl2004 wrote: »

So because people like to make assumptions? Well if you're going to give advice it's generally not wise to make assumptions and work on facts.

It is a fact that the overwhelming majority of children attend school, it is the default option.

poet123

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

Agreed.

But why make any assumptions at all?

Why not answer the OP 's questions that she posed?

If she intends to home school or send her child to school it is irrelevant.

She made it quite clear that she did not wish to send her child to nursery and did not ask for any advice in that respect.

I agree it is probably irrelevant, but it could be very relevant.

People like to offer their opinions based on a scenario and look at different outcomes. No one act can been seen in isolation you have to look at the overall picture, some posters have said it could be xyz, and some have said it could be the HV. None of us knows which scenario is true or whether it is a mixture of all the parts.

shirlgirl2004

poet123 wrote: »

It is a fact that the overwhelming majority of children attend school, it is the default option.

School is not the default option if it were you wouldn't have to apply by default you would be assigned a school if you didn't choose. That isn't what happens. (See I can use bold too :rotfl:)

poet123

shirlgirl2004 wrote: »

School is not the default option if it were you wouldn't have to apply by default you would be assigned a school if you didn't choose. That isn't what happens. (See I can use bold too :rotfl:)

You have to complete forms to choose a school, because you have just that; choice. If you have a child in school and choose to take them out you have to de register them because school is the default option.

I note you didn't argue that it is a fact that the overwhelming majority do attend school.;)