Not 'doing' Santa - part two

Soubrette

bestpud wrote: »

Absolutely - each unto their own.

It is the hypocrisy of the OP that I find cringe worthy!

I dunno, I love magic shows (ok maybe not Paul Daniels ) but I don't believe in magic. I cry at fiction movies and books even though they are not real. Things that are imaginary have a reality of their own too and can be fun to do even in the full knowledge that its not real. If you dress up a little girl as a fairy - does she think it's real or does she enjoy pretending to be a fairy?

Perhaps the OP was overly influenced by the accusations of no Father Christmas means no magic and was determined to inject some of her own, perhaps she's just that kind of person. I personally never felt the need - I enjoyed the fun of thinking about other people and what they might really enjoy as a gift with the children and then going out and shopping for it, wrapping it etc, that to me is the magic of christmas, thinking of others and making an effort to be with your family - perhaps also an indication of the kind of family I had as a child.

However, if either of my girls decide that they do want to do the Father Christmas thing then I will do my best to support that decision and ensure that my grandchildren do not hear a word from me that Father Christmas is not real in the actual sense of the word.

Soubrette

Poppy9 wrote: »

Many young children are terrified of FC!!

Up until the age of about 8 (probably when he realised Father Christmas wasn't actually going to pop through his door) one of my friends had to leave a sign on her son's door asking him (FC) to leave any stockings or presents downstairs and not to enter his room under any circumstances. I have to admit I had never come across this before although other friends have had some negative experiences of Father Christmas (a tiny minority compared to those positive experiences of course).

karren

Abbymoo wrote: »

I'm...no Father Christmas...coz he's a lie...but...magic dust...isn't a lie...um...I must've had too much Baileys. This is not makeh de sehnse...
If I have nippers I'll be doing FC, magic, the lot. Even got instructions on how to do glitter bootprints on the carpet saved in my bookmarks and am planning on getting a house with a proper chimney for the fella to come down, just to save awkward questions about how he can get in through an air vent.

Duh!
He's got a magic key!!!!!
Keep up with the times lol lol

Soubrette

Nicki wrote: »

Contrary to what skintchick and notanewuser think I think there is far more chance of a nursery school age child telling their peers that santa isn't real than an older child doing so. Little kids have no filter between thought and brain and little empathy. Whilst older kids like to show off, they can also empathise with younger kids and enjoy the fact they know a secret which others are too young to be told, so IMO and IME are far more likely not to tell

I can only say that that was not my experience, both my daughters sailed through preschool without even an idea that they may have different experiences of Father Christmas compared to some of their little playmates. My real problem was with the younger one when she was 6/7 and desperate to tell her friends 'the truth'. However, even then it lead to interesting discussions about what different people believe and how we should respect that (and even how we might be wrong ourselves!). By the age of 8 it just didn't seem an issue to her any more.

bestpud

Soubrette wrote: »

I dunno, I love magic shows (ok maybe not Paul Daniels ) but I don't believe in magic. I cry at fiction movies and books even though they are not real. Things that are imaginary have a reality of their own too and can be fun to do even in the full knowledge that its not real. If you dress up a little girl as a fairy - does she think it's real or does she enjoy pretending to be a fairy?

Perhaps the OP was overly influenced by the accusations of no Father Christmas means no magic and was determined to inject some of her own, perhaps she's just that kind of person. I personally never felt the need - I enjoyed the fun of thinking about other people and what they might really enjoy as a gift with the children and then going out and shopping for it, wrapping it etc, that to me is the magic of christmas, thinking of others and making an effort to be with your family - perhaps also an indication of the kind of family I had as a child.

However, if either of my girls decide that they do want to do the Father Christmas thing then I will do my best to support that decision and ensure that my grandchildren do not hear a word from me that Father Christmas is not real in the actual sense of the word.

Pretending is the same for Santa as it is magic or fairies though.

The OP has decided to cut out Santa altogether and made a big thing of telling others they are lying to their children and yet she thinks it is ok to pretend her and her husband were powered by magic dust when they filled the sack!

My opinion is the OP is an attention seeker and revels in being different.

It can't be all about family for her - that ridiculous rhyme tells us it's about gifts.

Soubrette

bestpud wrote: »

Pretending is the same for Santa as it is magic or fairies though.

The OP has decided to cut out Santa altogether and made a big thing of telling others they are lying to their children and yet she thinks it is ok to pretend her and her husband were powered by magic dust when they filled the sack!

My opinion is the OP is an attention seeker and revels in being different.

It can't be all about family for her - that ridiculous rhyme tells us it's about gifts.

No, it's about family for me and that's what matters to me, I suppose I don't really care if its about the presents to the OP - if it is, well that's her meaning of christmas and who am I to condemn.

I don't understand the big deal about lying about Father Christmas. If you (everybody) believe it is a lie then it is for the best possible motives and on some levels he does exist so I can understand why some people don't consider it a lie.

There are loads of situations where I would lie, a mythical gift giver is not one of them but so what. In situations like this I don't feel bad about the times I choose to lie and I don't feel bad about the times I choose to tell the truth, neither should anyone else imo.

Mrs_Imp

Errata wrote: »

Good grief, whatever happened to a sock containing an apple, and orange, some nuts, an annual and a bar of chocolate...

We got notepaper, envelopes, a pen and stamps too. Santa wanted to make sure that we wrote our thank you letters promptly

ecgirl07

Soubrette wrote: »

No, it's about family for me and that's what matters to me, I suppose I don't really care if its about the presents to the OP - if it is, well that's her meaning of christmas and who am I to condemn.

I don't understand the big deal about lying about Father Christmas. If you (everybody) believe it is a lie then it is for the best possible motives and on some levels he does exist so I can understand why some people don't consider it a lie.

There are loads of situations where I would lie, a mythical gift giver is not one of them but so what. In situations like this I don't feel bad about the times I choose to lie and I don't feel bad about the times I choose to tell the truth, neither should anyone else imo.

reading skintchicks posts on the other thread it sounds like she has a major issue with "lies" and is completely black and white on the issue. Im struggling to equate a belief in Santa as lies, as the benefits far outweigh the cons.

however the only way to find out the full effect of a "magic sack that has presents from mummy and daddy" christmas is to wait for skintchickjnr to post in 20 years time about how her christmasses were messed up or otherwise.

Soubrette

ecgirl07 wrote: »

reading skintchicks posts on the other thread it sounds like she has a major issue with "lies" and is completely black and white on the issue. Im struggling to equate a belief in Santa as lies, as the benefits far outweigh the cons.

however the only way to find out the full effect of a "magic sack that has presents from mummy and daddy" christmas is to wait for skintchickjnr to post in 20 years time about how her christmasses were messed up or otherwise.

Of course I personally don't believe that the benefits outweigh the cons which is probably why we didn't do it Mine are 17 and 19 and seem ok at the moment but who knows That said their contempories mostly did do it and they seem ok too

It is true but as some poet somewhere said, parents they **** you up. It's highly unlikely that any christmas traditions, happy, sad or downright weird will mess up your children for ever, one of my friends has to wear knickers on her head at the in laws christmas party, thankfully it's clean :eek:. It just seems a shame that someone who is excited about their unorthodox christmas tradition had such a slating and probably had some of the magic taken away.

When you have a mainstream view you can easily get it validated if you are unsure, it's not so easy when you have unusual or minority beliefs and that is speaking from personal experience and as parents don't we all have crises of faith that we're doing the best thing?

bestpud

Soubrette wrote: »

Of course I personally don't believe that the benefits outweigh the cons which is probably why we didn't do it Mine are 17 and 19 and seem ok at the moment but who knows That said their contempories mostly did do it and they seem ok too

It is true but as some poet somewhere said, parents they **** you up. It's highly unlikely that any christmas traditions, happy, sad or downright weird will mess up your children for ever, one of my friends has to wear knickers on her head at the in laws christmas party, thankfully it's clean :eek:. It just seems a shame that someone who is excited about their unorthodox christmas tradition had such a slating and probably had some of the magic taken away.

When you have a mainstream view you can easily get it validated if you are unsure, it's not so easy when you have unusual or minority beliefs and that is speaking from personal experience and as parents don't we all have crises of faith that we're doing the best thing?

But the magic she chose to inject into her Christmas is make believe (aka a lie).

It is hypocritical to make a big issue of lying and then replace one lie with another.

She seems to think that is ok because her daughter doesn't believe in magic - well she doesn't believe in Santa either! What is the difference?

On top of all that, she felt the need to announce it on here and tell people how they could respond!

I can't think of any reason for that apart from attention seeking.