Not 'doing' Santa - part two

Soubrette

shegirl wrote: »

The fun and magic of Santa never dies,even when you know he isn't real

This is really not much different than saying that the fun and magic of Father Christmas* can be appreciated even IF you know he isn't real.

*I apologise but I can't bear the creeping americanisation of our culture even though I understand that others don't feel the same way including my two daughters who spend a lot of time rolling their eyes at their old mum because of this issue

bestpud

Soubrette wrote: »

This is really not much different than saying that the fun and magic of Father Christmas* can be appreciated even IF you know he isn't real.

*I apologise but I can't bear the creeping americanisation of our culture even though I understand that others don't feel the same way including my two daughters who spend a lot of time rolling their eyes at their old mum because of this issue

It's the memories and feelings from when he was 'real' that stay with us, in my opinion.

I'm not sure it's the same for someone who has never experienced that.

Soubrette

bestpud wrote: »

It's the memories and feelings from when he was 'real' that stay with us, in my opinion.

I'm not sure it's the same for someone who has never experienced that.

Having been brought up myself to believe in Father Christmas I have to say that is not how it is for me. I accept though that it is different for different people and your experiences will inform your future decisions and there is nothing wrong with that.

shegirl

bestpud wrote: »

It's the memories and feelings from when he was 'real' that stay with us, in my opinion.

I'm not sure it's the same for someone who has never experienced that.

Exactly .

notanewuser

I started the original thread, where Skintchick and I (and others) shared similar views.

I'm surprised by SC's approach though!!

My DD is 26 months old. We don't actively encourage a belief in Santa - ie we will tell her that some people believe (and that its okay) without telling her that he is real. So in the same way that I wouldn't expect her to give her greatgrandma a lecture about Christianity when she says "bless you" when she sneezes, we won't be expecting her to announce to anybody that he isn't real.

We had our Xmas on Xmas eve. The whole thing. My mum and dad took her to a garden centre grotto on the Saturday - she absolutely HATED it!!!
I did dig out the personalised stocking that was bought for her first Xmas, and put an orange, a few chocolate coins and some new books in there.

Once my parents had arrived all the presents came out - she was really good about it and it took her 3 days to open everything (she didn't get a lot but she was more interested in playing than in opening presents!!

I avoid anything with Santa on it - wrapping paper, sacks etc. she's seen real reindeer but not in relation to Santa. We didn't do any magic anything - we watched The Snowman and Room on the Broom, both if which are books she has so she knows they are stories.

So no Santa, no lies but plenty of magic (and the odd sip of Buck's Fizz).

Poppy9

lostinrates wrote: »

Tbh, I am horrified at the manner of response some have shown here. I am strongly on the side of magic, imagination and indeed cultural affiliation with peers (where their is no religious belief or different religious belief) and even belief, but it seems that for many who ahare this opinion as me the ' magic' of Santa has given them little magic of civility in adulthood.

The problem is the OP attitude to this thread. She started the thread that she knew was a hot topic

I thought, seeing as the other thread was so hotly debated, people might be interested in how Christmas without Santa worked for us?

but then declined to partake in the thread because there was no support for her "take" on a Christmas tradition.

IMO if the OP was content with her decision then she would feel able to defend her choice and argue her corner.

I think some replies have appeared harsh as they feel the OP is saying that their opinion is not worthy of a response.

I amongst family friends am the minority (ok well it's only me) as I don't see the point of sending greeting cards to people you will see in person or who live in the same house as you. Everyone else disagrees with me and I respect that and do send cards to people who say they value them and their content. In return some respect my wishes so my OH and DD don't send me Xmas/Anniversary or Mothers day cards but they do send me a birthday card. My point is, I am happy with my POV and am happy to argue my corner if necessary. I wouldn't start a thread on these boards about this topic unless I was prepared to discuss and be open to other people's POV.

bestpud

Soubrette wrote: »

Having been brought up myself to believe in Father Christmas I have to say that is not how it is for me. I accept though that it is different for different people and your experiences will inform your future decisions and there is nothing wrong with that.

Absolutely - each unto their own.

It is the hypocrisy of the OP that I find cringe worthy!

Poppy9

notanewuser wrote: »

I started the original thread, where Skintchick and I (and others) shared similar views.

I'm surprised by SC's approach though!!

My DD is 26 months old. We don't actively encourage a belief in Santa - ie we will tell her that some people believe (and that its okay) without telling her that he is real. So in the same way that I wouldn't expect her to give her greatgrandma a lecture about Christianity when she says "bless you" when she sneezes, we won't be expecting her to announce to anybody that he isn't real.

We had our Xmas on Xmas eve. The whole thing. My mum and dad took her to a garden centre grotto on the Saturday - she absolutely HATED it!!!
I did dig out the personalised stocking that was bought for her first Xmas, and put an orange, a few chocolate coins and some new books in there.

Once my parents had arrived all the presents came out - she was really good about it and it took her 3 days to open everything (she didn't get a lot but she was more interested in playing than in opening presents!!

I avoid anything with Santa on it - wrapping paper, sacks etc. she's seen real reindeer but not in relation to Santa. We didn't do any magic anything - we watched The Snowman and Room on the Broom, both if which are books she has so she knows they are stories.

So no Santa, no lies but plenty of magic (and the odd sip of Buck's Fizz).

Many young children are terrified of FC!!

I hadn't grown up with the Easter Bunny tradition as being raised a RC it was very much a religious festival and we just had an Easter Egg on Easter Sunday as a treat after Lent. DD came home talking about EB from nursery school so for fun I wrote a few poems as clues and did an Easter Egg hunt, but never said the EB was real. The following year she said on Easter Saturday "I hope the EB comes tonight" and I realised she was expecting another treasure hunt! It stopped quite naturally though and when she could write properly herself we each wrote clues for each other and hid the creme eggs. She enjoyed this just as much in trying to find hiding places herself and write a clue to match!

Sometimes you don't have to lie, you just don't have to dispel the myth and stay silent.

Nicki

I do santa in our house with our kids and enjoy it.

I also posted on the original thread though not in the more violent aggressive terms some did when it degenerated.

But I have to say, I just don't get the distinction in what skintchick did. If her kid knows magic isn't real so it is OK to tell her that magic brings her presents, and given that she has already told her child Santa isn't real, why could they not just say: "Lets leave a stocking out tonight and pretend that Santa and his reindeer will come and leave presents for you tomorrow". Then she at least gets to participate in the whole santa ritual and have stories to share with other kids and much less chance of her blurting out that her mum and dad say he doesn't exist in preschool and upsetting a lot of kids and parents.

Contrary to what skintchick and notanewuser think I think there is far more chance of a nursery school age child telling their peers that santa isn't real than an older child doing so. Little kids have no filter between thought and brain and little empathy. Whilst older kids like to show off, they can also empathise with younger kids and enjoy the fact they know a secret which others are too young to be told, so IMO and IME are far more likely not to tell

shegirl

bestpud wrote: »

Absolutely - each unto their own.

It is the hypocrisy of the OP that I find cringe worthy!

Yep,anti ' lies' and all the ' you don't need magic for Christmas to be magic' spiel then using magic dust and a poem for the presents:rotfl: