Desperate help needed with grants n benefits

whiffyleaks

Money for 'parking and fees'? What fees? Is this a wind up? If you couldn't even afford to carpet the downstairs if needed and your boyfriend was unemployed then why have another child? Sorry - sounds like bad budgeting/parenting rather than unfortunate circumstances.

nannytone_2

its all very wise if you can afford it!

i am not unintelligent and i am very good with money.
but i didnt antici[ayr yjay i would be virtually unemployable by the time i was 40.
most people spend their time just 'getting by'. i'm glad you have a nice life, and no doubt you work for it. but for a bast percentage of the popilation ... no matter how hard they wrok... they will only ever 'just get by'

princessdon

nannytone wrote: »

its all very wise if you can afford it!

i am not unintelligent and i am very good with money.
but i didnt antici[ayr yjay i would be virtually unemployable by the time i was 40.
most people spend their time just 'getting by'. i'm glad you have a nice life, and no doubt you work for it. but for a bast percentage of the popilation ... no matter how hard they wrok... they will only ever 'just get by'

I'm not going to argue with you on op's thread - and of course people just get by, everyone lives to their current means as its human nature. I also suspect that you didn't end up in dire straits when your illness hit as you're "good with money" so this provided breathing space. You may not have the life you dreamed of, but not unable to eat etc. Benefits for those with children are generous as you yourself say time and time again in here (opposed to singletons), the time they are not is when debts are involved - hence needing the debt boards and not loans.

I stand by what I say - people who are currently working need to look at what they can put away because whilst it won't last forever, it can mean a lot in the interim initial need. As op highlights, it happens and fast - the only way to avoid this is putting it away whilst you can.

SingleSue

Op - is there a Freecycle or similar set up near you? That might help with the clothing or baby items part of things. We also, in our area, have a page set up on Facebook for low cost or free items...my brother and sister in law have managed to get so many things for my little niece from there for very little cost.

Re food, is there a food bank nearby? Our local Salvation Army do food packs for those struggling, maybe there is something similar where you are.

Ok, they are not permanent solutions but it could take the heat off in the short term and allow you some breathing space and give you some relief, very important whilst you are pregnant.

I remember only too well the scary gas monster as I called the prepayment machine I had, in the winter, it seemed like I had to constantly feed it and it did get tough/stressful trying to walk that fine line between providing enough good quality food and enough heat, especially in very cold snaps.

princessdon

SingleSue wrote: »

Op - is there a Freecycle or similar set up near you? That might help with the clothing or baby items part of things. We also, in our area, have a page set up on Facebook for low cost or free items...my brother and sister in law have managed to get so many things for my little niece from there for very little cost.

Re food, is there a food bank nearby? Our local Salvation Army do food packs for those struggling, maybe there is something similar where you are.

Ok, they are not permanent solutions but it could take the heat off in the short term and allow you some breathing space and give you some relief, very important whilst you are pregnant.

I remember only too well the scary gas monster as I called the prepayment machine I had, in the winter, it seemed like I had to constantly feed it and it did get tough/stressful trying to walk that fine line between providing enough good quality food and enough heat, especially in very cold snaps.

They only need a few weeks so excellent suggestions. Once baby and baby benefits are there and they have time to get debts at more realistic payment levels it will give breathing space.

Op people have said this and given your 3 yr old is eating noodles getting your debts on a payment plan is your priority - please post on the debt free board for advice as you are throwing away money you don't have.

nannytone_2

the vast propotion of people cant put anything away.... theyre far tpp busy trying to make ends meet.

my mum always says im the worst kind of person, because im mean to myself.

you are in a fortunate position and choose to judge otherts by your own standards.

we arent all that lucky.
im looking at losing a third of my income over the next 2 yearsl and im not in a position to better mt circumstances.

some people will only be happu when the people less fortunate than themselves have to resort to living in tents and beggin for their favour.

if you need to spew bile on those less fortunate then go ahead.
of ot makes you feel better ....

pipkin71

princessdon wrote: »

Benefits for those with children are generous as you yourself say time and time again in here (opposed to singletons), the time they are not is when debts are involved - hence needing the debt boards and not loans.

Benefits are generous where someone has children - and agree, it is debt that sees people struggling.

princessdon wrote: »

I stand by what I say - people who are currently working need to look at what they can put away because whilst it won't last forever, it can mean a lot in the interim initial need. As op highlights, it happens and fast - the only way to avoid this is putting it away whilst you can.

I think it's also important if people on benefits can put a small amount away each week because it is very easy to find yourself in dire straights if a necessary item breaks down or benefits are not paid for some reason and bills are due.

OP, you have had some good advice - check freecycle and write to your creditors offering minimal payments until you are more financially secure.

Getting rid of the car sounds like a good plan. Would you be able to claim some road tax back, if you return it? I'm not sure if that's possible, but thought I read about it, somewhere.

Do check out the old style board. There are some interesting threads on there looking at how to feed your family on a budget.

I understand your unwillingness to have social service involvement in your life. I had the same thoughts a while ago but you do get caring social workers who just want to make life easier for you and it would mean you could get a food parcel. Social workers are recommending many families receive help from food banks and are not rushing to take children into care because they are struggling financially. Think about it for the sake of your little girl. Noodles continuously, do not make for a healthy diet.

Good luck with it all and please try not to get too stressed out because that is not good for the baby, nor you, for that matter.

As an aside, the OP didn't read like the poster was looking for handouts off MSE, just advice.

Hmm71

debrag wrote: »

Why no HB?

The OP is getting some HB and CTB, as stated in her first post but that led to a little confusion as to how much she was getting and when and what she had to live on.
She still has to pay £12 a week towards the rent out of her limited budget.

OP, I really hope you can get help from all the suggestions on the thread. You and your family will get through this tough time and this time next year I'm sure you'll be having a much merrier Christmas.

CharmCaster

whiffyleaks wrote: »

Money for 'parking and fees'? What fees? Is this a wind up? If you couldn't even afford to carpet the downstairs if needed and your boyfriend was unemployed then why have another child? Sorry - sounds like bad budgeting/parenting rather than unfortunate circumstances.

Unnecessary and inaccurate.

princessdon

nannytone wrote: »

the vast propotion of people cant put anything away.... theyre far tpp busy trying to make ends meet.

my mum always says im the worst kind of person, because im mean to myself.

you are in a fortunate position and choose to judge otherts by your own standards.

we arent all that lucky.
im looking at losing a third of my income over the next 2 yearsl and im not in a position to better mt circumstances.


some people will only be happu when the people less fortunate than themselves have to resort to living in tents and beggin for their favour.

if you need to spew bile on those less fortunate then go ahead.
of ot makes you feel better ....

Depends on your view of fortunate. been through more redundancies than most, lost a child, had cancer, have an illness that means under current descriptiors hits the support group

How do you define less fortunate? The fact that I popped pennies away to help ease any transition to benefits means I am now fortunate.