Not 'doing' Santa

shegirl

skintchick wrote: »

No I meant the threat parents make of 'if you don;t do xyz thing i want you to do right now, FC won;t bring you any presents'.

That's what I don't like.

But yeah, the whole gotta be good all year thing sucks as well.

Yeah,in my experience in the situation you've given, is kids thinking 'ooh' and running to do as they're told in an excited state lol

Why do you think so many parents laugh about the ability to use the santa threat? I'll give you a clue..it's not because it scares the kids (it doesn't)

bylromarha

Another thought - not having read the thread...has it been mentioned?

Some kids actually are scared of FC. My nephew had to be told at a young age Santa did not exist.

He got freaked by the idea of a big fat bearded stranger creeping into his house one night. My sister had to put a stairgate up each Cmas Eve until nephew was 6, a sign at the bottom of the stairs saying no further Santa. A No entry Santa sign on the door.

Cmas Eve was a load of stress for her as the poor thing was petrified and took ages to go to sleep.

Heard similar stories from friends through the years as well, their kids experiencing the same terror.

omnasia

I don't see it as lying as it's based on the story of someone doing something good for poorer children and has been adopted into our collective culture. I can remember being so excited on Christmas Eve and I wanted my own children to experience that. It's a lovely, happy thing to do.

As for positive parenting, attachment parenting or whatever it is, I think that's just an ego trip and actually very patronising to those of us who only do 'mainstream' parenting.

Nicki

I lie to my 3 year old all the time! Huge outrageous lies which he sees right through and usually laughs uproariously at. Like claiming it is he who broke wind when it was me or that his broccoli is a bonsai tree or there is a shark in his bath water. I find it all part of the fun of having a young child and it is a shared pleasure in the same way as Father Christmas is. I am really struggling with the accusation that any lie to a child is immoral to be honest.

seven-day-weekend

When our son was small, I didn't want to 'do Santa' either. I saw it as lying to children

However, my husband saw nothing wrong with it so we compromised by making Santa someone who delivered the presents that others had bought, no magic powers or coming down the chimney. (I was terrified by that concept when I was a child, in fact I was frightened of Santa altogether).

We still enjoyed Christmas and put out mince pies and carrots for Santa and the reindeer.

I have no problem though if someone does not want to 'do Santa'. Left to myself, I would have left him out of Christmas too.

OrkneyStar

thegirlintheattic wrote: »

....are you going to say their reception class drawing is crap, when they think it is a work of art?

No, I will say it is lovely or good mostly, sometimes 'what is it?' with a smile, because for their age group it generally isn't crap.

valk_scot

shegirl wrote: »

Yeah,in my experience in the situation you've given, is kids thinking 'ooh' and running to do as they're told in an excited state lol

Why do you think so many parents laugh about the ability to use the santa threat? I'll give you a clue..it's not because it scares the kids (it doesn't)

I was in Tesco with my then four year old one year and he was misbehaving in that chronically hyper way that four year olds do the week before Christmas. So I told him that Santa could see what he was doing via the ceiling security cameras. He spent the rest of the shopping trip slinking along the aisles like a ninja with his back flat to the shelves and trying not to go into the field of view of the cameras. And silent, which was excellent!

The day after Christmas he was back to his normal self in Tesco btw, so it didn't last long. Scared? I think not. It's just part of the game, really.

OrkneyStar

valk_scot wrote: »

I was in Tesco with my then four year old one year and he was misbehaving in that chronically hyper way that four year olds do the week before Christmas. So I told him that Santa could see what he was doing via the ceiling security cameras. He spent the rest of the shopping trip slinking along the aisles like a ninja with his back flat to the shelves and trying not to go into the field of view of the cameras. And silent, which was excellent!

The day after Christmas he was back to his normal self in Tesco btw, so it didn't last long. Scared? I think not. It's just part of the game, really.

You can still get them to behave by reminding them of something that will/won't happen, gifts they will/won't get, to 'help' them to behave, if that is how you choose to parent (not commenting on whether this is a good idea or not, personally I don't think it is ideal, but have been known to give a gentle reminder in this way ), without involving Santa surely?
I am sure you are not alone in doing things like this, just as I am not alone in not doing it?

CH27

There really are some joyless people around.

cr1mson

I wasn't going to do Santa either although still had stockings etc just didn't specify who filled them. Kids still believed that it is Santa and even my oldest still believes! So you may find they believe anyway!

Main reason I ended up colluding is would have had to ask them to withhold the truth from their friends which to me is actually worse than me pretending there is a Santa.