What age do you stop....................

Rossy2692

DD is 20 now, only child, just feel pressured to buy i think, offered to pay for MOT and repairs that need doing but she said she would rather pay for that herself and have stuff to open christmas day, really dont know why this expectation has continued

Am by no means loaded with cash, self employed white van woman with hubs on sick from work after heart attack at 44 so just sometime wonder...........

OrkneyStar

Mum still buys me and DH a few pressies, and also pressies for DS- though imho she buys him far too much! I do try to appreciate it though! .

hieveryone

My mum still goes mad for presents, even though I am out of the house and living with OH (and am 27).

It drives me mad...! She does get me very nice things, as she knows me so well but I wish she would spend her money on herself.

I_wanna_live_for_free

Rossy2692 wrote: »

DD is 20 now, only child, just feel pressured to buy i think, offered to pay for MOT and repairs that need doing but she said she would rather pay for that herself and have stuff to open christmas day, really dont know why this expectation has continued

Am by no means loaded with cash, self employed white van woman with hubs on sick from work after heart attack at 44 so just sometime wonder...........

I can sort of see her point, tbh! MOT and repairs she has to have done and has probably budgeted for but something to open is a nice treat, iykwim? I remember years ago my ex was told by his Dad he was getting a nice 18th birthday pressie. On the day he got a card with the quarterly electricity bill in it as "you're always leaving lights on" (not actually strictly true, either!) and that was IT.

Maybe have a look in the £ shops for reasonable bits if she wants a pile of pressies or just explain that you can't do it this year?

We certainly can't (maybe that's won't? :cool: ) as I'm on notice for redundancy in the spring and I'm looking at every single pound coin before I spend it (do I really, really NEED this? and the answer is usually no right now) just a good thing I've got DD's pressies already otherwise she would be getting a lot less this year!

hieveryone

Rossy2692 wrote: »

DD is 20 now, only child, just feel pressured to buy i think, offered to pay for MOT and repairs that need doing but she said she would rather pay for that herself and have stuff to open christmas day, really dont know why this expectation has continued

Am by no means loaded with cash, self employed white van woman with hubs on sick from work after heart attack at 44 so just sometime wonder...........

That makes me a bit sad, as I'm an only child too and I would hate my mum to feel like this, although I suspect she does a little.

elsien

On the grounds that mother (73) throws a strop if she doesn't get a santas sack full of prezzies, I'm assuming I get the equivalent for as long as she does. Otherwise I shall also be stropping all over the place. Whoever said Christmas was for kids was labouring under a misapprehension.

savingqueen

We stopped exchanging pressies for adults - parents, siblings, friends etc on both sides of family a few years ago as several of us can't easily afford it. We have also this year stopped buying gifts for adult nieces/nephews/godchildren now the youngest is 18 and one of them is now a parent themselves (we buy for our great-nephew is that is the right phrase?) I find this a bit difficult (feel a bit mean to be honest) but we are on a tight budget. I think it will be fine once the newness wears off and it becomes the norm.

The only pressies DH and I get is £20 between us from my parents which we tend to use on festive tipples like a nice liquer or two that we can't generally afford to buy the rest of the year. Some years DH & I haven't exchanged pressies as we have been broke after buying everyone elses but we have started buying each other a very small but thoughtful gift - nice to have something little to open and otherwise the kids are sad on our behalf.

sq:)

CH27

I've told my son that once he turns 18 next year he will only get £50 spent on him for xmas.

Macca83_2

You can spend £300 and have a sofa full of presents or you could spend £50 and still have a sofa full of presents. Is it the amount you're spending that's worrying you or that you think your child is too old for lots of presents?

thriftwizard

For many years we've done a £5 maximum amongst the adults/parents in our wider family. Quite probably because that's 18 of us, if I don't include my step-brothers & sisters & their families... Now my own 5 kids are grown up (youngest 17) they'll be getting something useful or much-wanted (but not expensive! Max. about £50) each and a small "surprise" stocking or possibly basket full of things like little soaps, packets of their favourite spices, chopsticks - small things that reflect their individual tastes & lifestyles. I suppose we've never been in a position to do the sofa-full of prezzies thing for each of them, but they seem to have survived somehow. And amongst the wider family, we've agreed this year to pool funds & do the Oxfam Unwrapped thing instead - we all have quite enough stuff!

Had we done the loadsa prezzies thing, I think we'd have stopped at about 15 - the sort of age where whatever you do or buy, it's the Wrong Thing, even if they were too nice to say so!