Clearing debts, keeping well and sorting myself out...

Emzilla

The problem is that OH's parents bailed him out a couple of years ago by getting a mortgage on their house and paying off his debts. So now, it's like they have a hold over him and he has to pay them so much every month (which he does). They don't let him forget it and are constantly throwing it in his face and asking him for money towards it. They are totally obsessed with money. They are fine spending it on themselves (recent purchases include a 3D TV and a 2 new recliner sofas), but when it comes to buying meals and using petrol, they claim that they are OAPs and can't afford it.

Prime example on Saturday, I did some work round there on my new laptop. His dad commented that it was a nice laptop and must have cost a lot of money. I replied that it was actually very reasonable for a laptop of this spec (£430 - which I have now paid for) and he said 'oh, I wish I could afford things like that'. So I pointed at his 3D TV and said 'how much was that then?'. He just looked at me and said 'well, that's a lot bigger' (stupid comment). So I ended it with 'well my laptop is vital to my work - no laptop = no money, you didn't need that 3D TV - your other one worked perfectly well'. He just huffed and left the room. One to me I think!!

Anyway, so they just expect for OH to pay for everything as they got the mortgage for him etc etc. OH then feels like he owes them, so he does everything they ask of him and pays for everything too. I told him that they are his parents and they didn't have to bail him out. He would have been better going bankrupt than having them throwing this in his face every 5 minutes. My mum (or my dad if he were alive) would never act like that with me.

But like I say, they are a very strange family.

Emz xx

Emzilla

beccie wrote: »

I would refuse to take them out, and say that you'd like to cook them something special instead. Then cook something awful

I would do, but the last time they stayed, I made some hotdogs and did some onion with it. I don't eat onion and therefore never have to peel and cook one. I was doing the best I could when peeling it, but his mother barged in and said I was doing it all wrong and proceeded to do it.

OH then told me that at Christmas (when he was up there and I was at home), she made a big deal over how I couldn't cook and didn't even know how to peel an onion!! As I said to OH, that onion would have been peeled and cooked if she wasn't there. Probably wouldn't have been done the way she would do it, or the quickest way, but it would have been done.

Emz xx

Emzilla

I've been looking on Rightmove again - check this out:

http://www.rightmove.co.uk/property-to-rent/property-31072609.html

How beautiful is that flat?? :drool:

Emz xx

beanielou

Bankruptcy would have been way better than the emotional blackmail.
I'm not big fans anyway of them going on their previous behaviour.

Emzilla

beanielou wrote: »

Bankruptcy would have been way better than the emotional blackmail.
I'm not big fans anyway of them going on their previous behaviour.

I know Lou. I don't think OH and I will ever get married, as I just don't want to be related to them. I'm so glad that I come from a loving, close family where we all help each other out.

Emz xx

beanielou

I just think myself that life is way too short to behave like that.
To each their own I suppose though.

MuffinTops

Hello Emz,
I'm sorry to hear about OH's parents again. How does your OH cope with it all? That constant chipping away at him must really drain you both.

That link is amazing. You really boost my resolve to get my mortgage paid up with links like that. Shall we go halveseys?

MTx

Emzilla

MuffinTops wrote: »

Hello Emz,
I'm sorry to hear about OH's parents again. How does your OH cope with it all? That constant chipping away at him must really drain you both.

That link is amazing. You really boost my resolve to get my mortgage paid up with links like that. Shall we go halveseys?

MTx

Thanks MT - OH seems to think that he owes them and therefore tries to please them by buying them meals, bits for his dad's car, DVDs for his mum etc etc. I keep telling him that none of that impresses them as all they care about is money. The best thing he can do is make sure that he pays for the mortgage each month (about £200) and try to pay some over it so that it clears more quickly and he can just tell them to do one when it comes to money.

That flat is something else isn't it? Glad my property !!!!!! spurs you on!! I'd love to go halves on that flat. I could live there very easily

Emz xx

gothrockchic1

Blah - to the parents visit. Your better than them anyway.

Love the flat but would rather be paying £1250 towards a mortgage!

Emzilla

gothrockchic1 wrote: »

Blah - to the parents visit. Your better than them anyway.

Love the flat but would rather be paying £1250 towards a mortgage!

Thanks GRC :A

I agree, but I am resigned to the fact that I'm never going to be in a position to get a mortgage.

Emz xx