Wait for Babies?

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  • immoral_angeluk
    immoral_angeluk Posts: 24,506 Forumite
    Combo Breaker First Post
    spud30 wrote: »
    I had my first child when I was 26, we were married and had our own house (shoebox more like), but had no money then or now.

    My daughter was only 5 months old, when my mum died suddenly at the age of 46 (I had already lost my dad, age 38, when I was 16)

    I am so glad we didnt wait, and my mum got to see my daughter. I gutted she never got to meet my son, but at least she knew one of my children.

    OMG that's like a mirror image of us. My first was born a few months after my mum was diagnosed with lung cancer. She was 6 months old when my mum died and one of the things that has always comforted me is that she got to see her first grandchild.
    Total 'Failed Business' Debt £29,043
    Que sera, sera. <3
  • spud30
    spud30 Posts: 16,872 Forumite
    OMG that's like a mirror image of us. My first was born a few months after my mum was diagnosed with lung cancer. She was 6 months old when my mum died and one of the things that has always comforted me is that she got to see her first grandchild.

    I agree it is very comforting knowing that she met my daughter, and also that she knew I was happy and settled.

    My daughter is now 11, and my lad is 9 and they are fantastic. I wouldnt be without them.
    Is it better to aim for the stars and hit a tree or aim for a tree and land in its branches :think:
    Loves being a Wonderbra friend :kisses3:
  • immoral_angeluk
    immoral_angeluk Posts: 24,506 Forumite
    Combo Breaker First Post
    spud30 wrote: »
    I agree it is very comforting knowing that she met my daughter, and also that she knew I was happy and settled.

    My daughter is now 11, and my lad is 9 and they are fantastic. I wouldnt be without them.

    I have a 2 yr old and a 11 week old. The 2 yr old is completely insane and the 11 week old cries all the time....


    But I wouldn't swap them for the world.
    Total 'Failed Business' Debt £29,043
    Que sera, sera. <3
  • bostin
    bostin Posts: 40 Forumite
    Name Dropper First Post First Anniversary
    Bear in mind that you should be entitled to SMP for 39 weeks during maternity. Would cover your loan repayments at least.

    We were also in a similar position to you, but realised that there will never be a perfect time to have a baby. Baby due in August!

    Good idea about living off the one salary, we are trying to do this at the moment with all of wifey's money being thrown on paying off overdrafts.
  • Hi Little Miss Giggles - Mr Pincher and I have also been considering this same thing...

    To answer your question about money you would be entitled to while on maternity leave would be:

    - Around £18pw child benefit (also receive this when/if return to work
    - Statutory Maternity Pay - first 6 weeks pays 90% of your usual salary. Then the next 33 weeks is currently £112.75 per week. It might be an idea to check with your employer if they offer enhanced occupational maternity pay i.e. a few extra weeks at 90% or 50% pay as some done.

    More info can be found here:

    http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/Bfsl1/BenefitsAndFinancialSupport/Expecting_or_bringing_up_children/index.htm

    Also you could be eligible to Child Tax Credits

    If you return to work for more than 16 hours a week could also be eligible for Working Tax Credits depending on yours and Mr Giggles joint income. Also to reduce childcare costs see if your employers are in the childcare voucher scheme.

    Even with all that my calculations show that me and Mr Pincher would lose around 40% of our monthly income and would probably need to find something like £300 a month to make up the shortfall but could save this in advance - would put paid to the mortgage free within 5 years dream though ;)
  • chevalier
    chevalier Posts: 7,937 Forumite
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker
    I have a 2 yr old and a 11 week old. The 2 yr old is completely insane and the 11 week old cries all the time....


    But I wouldn't swap them for the world.

    Sorry to hijack but IA is this because she has colic? If so there is some stuff called colief. You put it in babies bottle, or give her a drop or two before she starts feeding. It was the only thing that sorte DS2's colic. Once you have got your first bottle, which is expensive, and it works you can get it on prescription
    chev
    I want a job that is less than an hour driving away from my house! Are you listening universe?
  • chocaholic110
    chocaholic110 Posts: 2,509 Forumite
    Ciara wrote: »
    Also, bear in mind that you may not get pregnant straight away, me and OH have been trying for the last 2 and a half years. Hopefully with the aid of fertility treatment theres light at the end of the tunnel.

    It takes an average couple 6 to 12 months to conceive.

    That was going to be my point too. I fell pregnant with my first two in my twenties almost as soon as I started trying. Started trying for baby number 3 in January 2006 and still waiting. Similar stories among my friends. I just imagine how I would feel if I had waited until my thirties and was still waiting!!
  • Mrs_Sparkle
    Mrs_Sparkle Posts: 1,805 Forumite
    I'm holding my 10 week old son now and I'm far from debt-free- check out the sig. I second what everyone else has said about secondhand stuff, eBay etc-you can spend a fortune but you can also spend very little and get really lovely stuff. My only problem is that I'm having to go back to full-time work when he's only 14 weeks as my loan payments are £400 a month and we can't manage all our expenses on hubby's salary.
    Debt at highest May 2006: £27,472.24
    currently: £13,353.25
    DFW Nerd 178
    Proud to be dealing with my debts
  • bclark
    bclark Posts: 882 Forumite
    It seems that there are a number of differing opinions on here regarding how expensive having kids is. Lots of people have been daying that it is cheaper than you would think and others have been saying that it is really expensive!

    Which is it?
  • Lydia.42
    Lydia.42 Posts: 384 Forumite
    I think it depends on how you go about the whole baby thing - money wise.
    Yes it would be lovely to go on a shopping spree, and buy brand new mama's n papa's stuff, etc, but the baby will be to young and small to appreciate all the brands that are about.

    My OH and i decided that we shouldn't wait until we had cleared our debts as i am 32 this year, and as some others have said, you can never tell how long it will take to get pregnant/detect any problems.

    We had our lbm at the end of 2005, and have been working to clear our debts. By doing a budget we could see that when we first had our lbm there was no way we could cover our debts and survive on maternity pay. Now however, we are in a better position. We have now got everything on long term 0% to last throughout my maternity leave (due May 11th).

    Everything but the cot mattress has been second hand off e-bay/friday ad, or passed to us by friends of friends.
    Obviously family and friends have also bought new clothes, etc, but as someone else said - you can get bundles/bags of clothes for a few quid second hand, and all barely worn. So we have planned carefully and kept our eyes out for the bargains - after all you are pregnant for 9 months, plenty of time to find stuff, and not bid for over priced things on e-bay.

    I think if you sit and look at your budget, and accept that things may be tight, and you might not have the newest buggy on the market, then why not go for it if the figures work out.
    What's he building in there???
    Debt at highest £30,450 (Dec 05)
    Debt at lowest £9, 113 (Jul 07)
    How much did we over spend whilst on maternity leave :mad:
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