'supporting each other through really tough times'

missrlr

Well life is not going according to plan A presently. Or even plan B. in fact it seems to be doing its darnedest to pick the most awkward backwards difficult gonna bit ya on the arrise route possible.

so I am retiring with copiously quantities of chocolate and a box of tissues to bed

kidcat

missrlr - ((hugs))

Ginny please be careful sounds like a nasty cut

I took the kids out to breakfast this morning, it was a buffet type menu so they could eat whatever they wanted, we were there over two hours, kids ate free so was good value too.

Then we headed home and I actually did some DIY jobs I have been putting off, got DS9 bed fixed, DD7 ladder from bed fixed, carpet strips down, yet another door stop in the bathroom and several other little jobs that always seem to not get done.

Then discovered my parents had called - but they wont leave a message so we had to call back, it went - we are coming to yours between four and five - thankfully I was quick on my feet and spoke to DD18 whilst on the call and said ooh what time are we out today - to which she looked at me read my lips and said in nice loud voice - 4.30pm!
I know its rude but I really dont want to see them and I am now of the opinion I shouldnt have to.
She then went on to tell me a friend had dropped presents for kids off (why they cant just drop them direct I have no idea) so they were coming. We will come in the morning then - now knowing I am out tomorrow at dance with DD7 I said oh yes that is fine:)

She then realised it was dance and said but we wont come until after you get home from dance. OH will be here with the others so there is no reason to wait for me except to punish me and deliberately ignore what I asked.

So I have said yes - knowing full well I am thankfully out, DD18 has a university visit so I am leaving DD7 at dance with her friends and OH will collect her. I am then going straight out for the rest of day.

I just hope they dont make any comments tomorrow else OH will really lose it with them - he has had enough and is not impressed at all.

McCulloch - our Ald! had the steam mop still in today, so I assume they must get more stock than your store does perhaps? So it may be worth you calling another local branch in future if yours has sold out of something:)

Cheapskate

monnagran - I had strong coffee at a friend's this afternoon and have had chocolate as "afters", after a rather lush curry for tea! :rofl:

missrlr - commiserations - hope you enjoyed the choccy!

giinnyknit - am rather jealous of your orchard, but keeping fingers crossed for a good harvest for you!

kidcat - I'm always amazed you keep giving your family more chances, you're a better man than me! Enjoy your day off tomorrow - I'm being rather wicked in hoping that your DH tells 'em how it is! *mwahahah* My DD keeps asking why I don't take the littlies to see her or even to stay over; er, where do I start....? House full of indoor smokers, who swear like navvies, one adult male lodger I've never met, DD's BF who I've met exactly twice, one dog (kids don't really do dogs)..... not taking them even with me there, never mind LEAVING them there! :rofl:

ETA: belated hugs for Byatt, so sorry to hear of your sad loss, be strong, chick x

A xo

kidcat

cheapskate - its so hard isnt it explaining to smokers that you are not going to inflict in on your children, Could you tactfully pass it off as being a dog thing or a stranger thing?
Dont envy you, I would rather avoid the conflict if I can, I will only be pushed so far though.

Byatt

Thank you Kidcat for letting people know about Bess, also good on ya regarding your parents! :T

Darling Bess deteriorated quite rapidly after she had a seizure in the early hours of Saturday morning. For a short while she rallied and we hoped she would recover, but sadly on Monday night she had another one. She still enjoyed her food so we gave her all her favourites, pate', ice-cream, rice pudding...and we kept her at home so she didn't have the trauma of travelling to the vets. She was a truly wonderful dog and saw me through my awful divorce and losing my home, she was loyal and true and protected both myself and my daughter, she had a fierce bark so any strangers were given short shrift.

Sleep tight Bessie Boo. xxx

Thank you all for your kind thoughts. x

Peanut2013

Big hugs Byatt, I remember many a beloved pet passing on when I was a child and I worry for the day one of my parents current two leave us as they've been there since I was 13 / 14 so have very fond memories of them. Including them 'protecting' me the night I went into labour and actually getting funny of people coming towards me (they did back down the second I told them off for being silly).

Thinking of you xxxx

savingqueen

monnagran - you are a star!!! You do so much for others' benefit.

Hugs all round - especially to meanmarie, byatt, cheapskate, kidcat and missrlr.

missrlr - hope you are ok? here if you need to share...

Had a great day with the kids, went to sainsbobs cafe in the end so I could also save on parking and get a few bits I only buy there - kids were unusually helpful and wel lbehaved for a supermarket shop. Then home and got out the pile of craft/science activity boxes they have had stashed away for a long time (birthday/xmas gifts). We did several things and really enjoyed ourselves.

Not such a good end to the day though. Feeling really tired and out of sorts this eve (wonder if coming down with DS's bug) and also had a phone call from my sister which I let go to voice mail. Glad I did as wouldn't have known how to handle the call. Her and partner have set a wedding date, 3 months time. What the heck am I going to do? The message sounds like nothing has happenned at all. None of them have addressed the issues that have upset me so much and now the wedding will be used to sweep them under the carpet. If I go feeling as I do, it will feel so wrong and I don't want to express false sentiments. If I don't go, family will be very hurt and its not like there will be another wedding like another birthday next year. I was going to contact her and parents this weekend and say I am taking a break from contact with them. Can I still say that? I mean I know I can in theory but in practice... I am feeling very selfish and mean at the moment.

well tomorrow is another day. I didn't feel like dinner but now my tummy's rumbling and I'm too tired to get out of bed to get a snack (though have had some choccy in bed and got some on the duvet cover, naughty me )

kidcat

SQ - you have to do what is best for you, its not selfish, carrying on feeling as you do will only make you ill, I have come to realise that. In fact it occurred to me today that every time I have had a major issue with my parents, they always act like they are now and every time they do I get really upset and stressed, but end up falling ill within a few weeks I then am forced to back down and accept their help.

This time I get it more and hopefully am managing the stress of it, so am hoping I wont get caught in the same trap.

You have to take care of you and your little family - if that means telling them you want to have a break then thats what you have to do - as for the wedding, it sounds harsh but from a bigger picture angle your sister probably wont even notice you are not there - most brides and grooms couldnt tell who was there and who wasnt. I missed a wedding once - I still got a thank you for attending card though:)

monnagran

missrir: Hugs, hugs and more hugs. Keep telling yourself, "Everything passes, even this."

Kidcat: Well done. That could have been a sticky situation that you have neatly avoided.

Byatt: Oh my goodness, that's awful. I had a gorgeous, gentle German Shepherd that saw me through some very bad times. When she died I just knew that I couldn't put myself through that again and I never had another dog. I've always had cats since I was a child but again, the last cat I had was so special that when he went I vowed I'd not have another and so far I've stuck to it. Now in my 70s I don't think I could have another pet that might outlive me. I'm very torn sometimes but there we are. So I know how raw you must be feeling just now. Don't these pets leave a gigantic hole in our hearts and lives? You and your DD be very gentle with yourselves for a bit.

SQ: Thank you for your undeserved compliment. I think I only do these things because I'm very bossy and think I know just what is best for other people! And I don't always.

As to the wedding DO NOT FEEL GUILTY whatever you decide to do. People who have been hurtful to you have no good reason to expect you to roll over when they click their fingers. I'm sure you could salve your conscience with a congratulatory card and best wishes for the future. I don't see that you need to be involved with the wedding if you're not comfortable about it. Surely you can find something else that you absolutely must do that day.

x

nuttyp

Morning toughies, lots of chatter yesterday. SQ I know exactly how that feels, I 'have' to attend the funeral soon of OH uncle. Already the family are taking turns to attack each other. We too have been informed that there will be a wedding next September, exactly when 'if' we go on holiday time. I would rather not go, but I expect OH will feel obliged.

Monogran, well done on the help with takeling the kitchen. It amazes me some people can live like that, obviously some do through no choice. Me my kids say I have OCD with hovering lol. And I am a cleaning freak when ever im worried.

Well I will have a shower in 5 and get ready for work.