'supporting each other through really tough times'

lisakay_2

i'm definitely not 'hiding' hiding, and everything would be right with the world if only the big yellow thing of myth and legend would come out of hiding
one of the mums at school is trying to cause trouble for me and i'm trying to decide how to deal with it. she used to be my next door neighbour and is trying to make out we were terrible neighbours and horrible people, although parties until 3am every weekend were her idea of fun, not mine. i've had parties myself, good ones too but i've never woken the kids up (we weren't quiet, kids are very good sleepers) neighbours were always invited/warned. she regularly managed to wake my two up and theres a list of other complaints that could be made.
she's now telling all of the other parents in the playground that it's all me(now i know there's two sides to every story, but i genuinely can't think of a good reason why she would dislike me so much)
the most recent thing she is telling everyone is 'i can't believe she's a childminder, i would never trust her with my kids, she's awful'
what i would really like to do is lay her flat with one good punch to the nose but obviously i wont!
i've tried being nice to her in the past but she cannot look me in the eye and has gone as far as turning her back when i've said hello.

if it was just prsonal stuff, bit of b!tching then i could let it go, but not when it could affect what will hopefully become a good business.
i'm hoping most of the other mums will have the common sense to realise she's talking rubbish, but this is petty, childish, playground behaviour, verging on bullying. I don't have time/ patience for bullies. nor do i have time for feeling sorry for myself. could really do with a sunshine hit. the world is a much nicer place with a bit of sun.

midnight_express

VJsmum wrote: »

Evening all

Had sad news this morning - my lovely sister and her OH are separating.:( So sad, especially as she said they just don't like each other anymore. She has had a pretty hard time since she became an adult - one abusive relationship, being left as a single mother with pretty much nothing as she and the baby had to flee for their lives, and now a failed marriage. We knew things were hard for them, but not that it had come to this. Helpless. THat's the second bit of bad news in a week, a colleague's husband has been diagnosed with terminal liver cancer. Dreading the third now.

I wonder if I may ask some advice? My 16 year old daughter is overweight - probably by at least a stone. My OH thinks we should speak to her about it but she is such a body confident girl I don't want to knock that out of her. We encourage her to eat healthily and don't have much in the way of Carp food in the house. She could do more exercise but, as said, I don't want to be seen to be nagging her as she is actually confident in herself. I know I could post in the families board but I don't want them to tell me I am a dreadful parent or that I should leave my husband (which seems to sum up most of the advice :rotfl:) and you guys seem like mates I know some here have "mother" issues, and I don't want her to think that I am not on her side, so what would you do? I would be grateful for any advice.

Speaking from my own experience I'd say please don't say anything about her weight I've been dieting on and off since I was 11, I am now almost 55. Over the years I have lost hundreds of stones, I now weigh five stones more than when I started. My Mum (who was naturally thin and could get way with eating anything) moaned endlessly about my size which only made it harder for me to lose weight.
Being a stone over weight isn't a great deal. You could help by not having biscuits, crisps etc in the house and by slipping in a few lower calorie meals for the whole family. What you don't want is to give her a complex about her weight. A slightly overweight daughter is preferable to one with an eating disorder.

Dippypud

elizabunny

Dippypud wrote: »

Ooooh they are gorgeous:T:T What a lovely sight to wake up to this gloomy morning:)

elizabunny

Good morning one and all:) Dreadfully gloomy here today and if I have to put up with this bad back much longer I'm going to scream:eek:

Having said that, it's Friday:T My favourite day of the week. Will try and go for a walk with DH when he finishes work later -have to keep moving. Tomorrow evening we are going over to DS1 & DL for dinner, so that will be something nice to look forward to. Sunday I think we are going to the cinema if I can face two hours sitting in one position (but not sure about that yet).

Not being able to sleep properly means I have to get up ultra early, so the bread is already proving on the side -so glad I don't have to mix it by hand. Might see if I can rustle up some HM soup later. Standing for too long though is as much of a problem as sitting too long and laying in bed for too long.

I had a 'fast' day on my 5:2 diet yesterday and it went much better than Monday. Looking forward to eating normally until Monday (3rd fast day) and the big weigh in is tomorrow. Oooops the man on the news has just said a New Year Detox may possibly do more harm than good -can't win can we:D

fuddle

Removed what I really thought. Decided to hold back and shut up.

See you all on Monday toughies. Have a good weekend.

VJsmum

midnight_express wrote: »

Speaking from my own experience I'd say please don't say anything about her weight I've been dieting on and off since I was 11, I am now almost 55. Over the years I have lost hundreds of stones, I now weigh five stones more than when I started. My Mum (who was naturally thin and could get way with eating anything) moaned endlessly about my size which only made it harder for me to lose weight.
Being a stone over weight isn't a great deal. You could help by not having biscuits, crisps etc in the house and by slipping in a few lower calorie meals for the whole family. What you don't want is to give her a complex about her weight. A slightly overweight daughter is preferable to one with an eating disorder.

Thank you all - this ^^^^^ is the bit I'm most afraid of, so sorry you had to go through it. I am slightly overweight, but you wouldn't really think it to look at me - there's always that half stone or so isn't there. I think she may be eating more at school than she is letting on and, with her old school, she needed to walk over a mile each day there and back and did PE. Now she is taken to school - though does sometimes walk a mile back from the station coming home, and doesn't do PE. She loves her grub for sure - takes more after her dad than me and he is overweight. I don't have crisps, chocolate, nice biscuits in the house. We have plain biccys but she doesn't eat them and I do make cake but she rarely eats it. I think she might just eat too much. She has started going to aquacise so I am hoping that will help and she's starting a new drama group that will involve a hefty walk.

Thanks all and have a lovely day.

fuddle

Please can I ask you remove the quote part meme. I had second thoughts an deleted what I wrote. I ha no right to surmise and realised that as soon as I pressed submit. I don't want to cause trouble and would appreciate it if you could remove it for fear of causing havoc on the thread f

GreyQueen

Morning all, and thank you, Dippypud, for those gorgeous white rabbits. I spent a few seconds wondering about the context as there was no comment with the pic then recalled it was Feb 1st. Doh! In my defense, I haven't had my meds yet.

ginnyknit, so pleased that your LL is improving your garden and putting in a driveway and the enhancement this will be to your life and how it will help your OH. You hear so much bad news in this world, it's a pleasure to hear some good stuff.

VJsMum, I don't know what height/ build your 16 year old daughter so 1 stone may be a little or a lot on her frame, but is it possible that she may not have completed her growth yet and is in one of those intermediate stages? Sort of growing outwards before growing a bit more height? At 15, for example, I was 5' 9 but my adult height is a whisker under 5' 11. I'd acquired nearly 2 more inches height between 15 and 18.

It sounds like your family diet and lifestyle is very healthy and I'm glad that she has a positive body-image rather than being one of those poor souls afflicted with the opposite. I'd second midnight express' advice to be very careful not to turn her positive attitude into self-loathing, and the lovely idea of mother-daughter time which includes exercise sounds fun.

Very sorry to hear about your sister's marriage and your colleague's husband's diagnosis. It's grim how bad news seems to accumulate at times. Here's hoping no more troubles rear their heads for a while.

All is peaceable here at the Towers although some of the neighbours were having a right ding-dong last night. I don't know whether it's something about my neighbourhood but there are several young couples (late teen/early twenties) here and their relationships are incredibly stormy. Lots of rows spilling out into the communal areas with language which would make the proverbial fishwife blush. And hot and cold running Police officers.......

I suspect it's just that I'm just turning into an old biddy........:o Ach well. time for brekkie, tea and off to w*rk.

Hope everyone has a good day. GQ xx

elizabunny

More talk of horsemeat in our burgers on the news this morning -yuk! I know it is perfectly acceptable to eat this in many countries, but I'm really getting sick and tired of reading/hearing about the disgusting ingredients in many of our foods. Can't remember which site I was on reading about the nasties in bread, ice cream and various other items.

I know I can 'cook' my way out of some of it, as I mostly cook from scratch anyway, but there are lots of people who for a variety of reasons, cannot.

More and more I find I am just sticking to non processed foods in my grocery shop. I don't want wax all over my fruit and either have to spend ages trying to scrub it off or buy unwaxed at twice the price! :mad: Why can't they just leave our food alone and stop fiddling with it.

I wish I could grow everything, but it's just not possible. So I have to spend half my life trawling throught a lists of information trying to spot the nasties. God knows what it's all doing to our health.