'supporting each other through really tough times'

Byatt

TBH I didn't worry about ageing and such before ex went, then I was panicked :eek:...who was going to want me again, who would employ me...every time I looked in the mirror I seemed to accumulate wrinkles and grey hairs as I was looking. I looked young for my age, not sure I do now, but felt I looked 100.

I did in the first few months of this panic actually have botox and fillers, which strangely boosted my morale although initially I looked as though I'd gone ten rounds with Mike Tyson ! When at the clinic I met other women who had gone through the same as me, although for them they continued with it, I did not. Once was enough.

Eventually, I came to terms with my face again, thankfully, but it took a long time, but I look at older couples and wonder how they would feel if suddenly faced with being alone, especially as a couples we grow into our relationship, and how we look physically grows with it, we don't see the warts and all necessarily, and if we do, we love the person for them. OTOH, when thinking about undressing for the first time in front of a relative stranger with all the wrinkles and scars and lumps and bumps, well...:o:eek::rotfl:

grandma247

Kidcat I can't think of anyone more capable to do the job and you made me think of the saying " if you want something done ask a busy person". Ignore your mother. I think other people will already know you and her well enough to know what is really going on.

byatt I used my steamer for puddings but you have to remember to empty the water container out and keep the other topped up if you steam for a long time.
I am sure there will be a manual and recipes online.

[Deleted User]

Very valid point about being left alone BYATT, something I try to be constructive about though, we both have hobbies and friends independent of each other, always have had. I think it would be utterly devastating but we would either one of us manage to carry on living. We have a zest for life that carries us through most dark times and enough back up from friends and family to support us until we found respective feet again. We both of us don't think life just stops and that's it, so maybe an ending would be another beginning - guess we'll find out one day eh? Cheers Lyn xxx.

shegar

fuddle wrote: »

Alfie is always on a lead. We cannot let him off as the beagle in him would just run, chase, run and we'll lose him. So yeah, he was on a lead.

Well in that case I dont think you have a lot to worry about, I think the lady will have gone home and weighed the situation up and you wont hear from anyone regarding this...

I expect her first reaction was to to take your name and address down, but since calming down , she will know that you your dog was leashed up and under control by it, it would be hard for anyone to say you didnt have the dog under control, the first thing the police will ask the lady is is "was the dog on a lead " where she will answer yes ..........Poor dog obviously feels unwell with his ear prob, and I hope it will soon getter better...........Sheila

grandma247

You can steam chicken breast too.

Byatt

Yes, and I did carry on living, despite losing my husband, family and home, not counting the loss of self esteem, sense of security and belief. Continued to support my daughter, studied for a degree, my mother dying, and moving home 3 times in as many years. I had my own business, I had my own friends and interests too. Losing a loved one through death whilst devastating doesn't carry with it the feelings that being left, after a marriage of almost 30 years, does.

Byatt

grandma247 wrote: »

Kidcat I can't think of anyone more capable to do the job and you made me think of the saying " if you want something done ask a busy person". Ignore your mother. I think other people will already know you and her well enough to know what is really going on.

byatt I used my steamer for puddings but you have to remember to empty the water container out and keep the other topped up if you steam for a long time.
I am sure there will be a manual and recipes online.

Thanks, not sure what that means...I put water in the bottom for timing...should I put water somewhere else?

fuddle

Thanks Sheila. I recoiled in horror when you mentioned the police. The poor lad is in the kitchen on his own till the girls are in bed. I hope she won't report us because when you take shock and emotion out of it I/dog didn't do anything wrong. Fingers crossed.

Byatt should anything happen to DH and I, I won't be looking for another partner. I will manage on my own and sometimes I think it would be much easier just pleasing myself. I'm a happy hermit though and quite happy in my own company.

Byatt

Being happy in your own company, (which I am) is very different when it's 24/7...I read something recently, in a magazine I think at the doctors, about a daughter worried about her mum who had not dated/met anyone since divorcing (about 10 years), her mother had said, I have plenty of great friends and family to do things with, but no-one to do nothing with...

that struck home, very true and very poignant.

mardatha

I'm with Mrs L - I don't worry much about anything, wee niggles about the family but I also know they'll find their own way and manage.
It's our 47th anniversary today (I got married very young. I wis 2) and as usual, we aren't talking. :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl: Why break the habit of a lifetime?