evicting a racist lodger

J_i_m

I think it's very easy to have double standards on this moral terrority, even with the best of intentions we can take an unbalanced view on things.

One thing which is clear is that everyone has different tolerance levels of other people.

The opening post strongly gives a one sided perspective on this issue with high reluctance perhaps even refusal to give audience to the other side. Now why is this? Could the OP's take on this alleged racism really be that "cut & dried" or are they infact warey that discussing the actual incident which provoked this debate would see a reasoned argument against their point of view which would be difficult to reasonably argue against and suggest things the OP simply doesn't want to hear or acknowledge?

If the OP really wants this person out, fair enough. It's their home it's not our place to judge them on who they want to live with. But we all need to be careful on how we judge others whose morals don't perfectly align with our own.

Fire_Fox

Southend1 wrote: »

What I am saying is that people have different views on many things. My opinion on this is that it is healthy in a democratic society for different views to proliferate. However, we all should be mindful of other people's views and potential to cause them offence.

That is what I said, but it is not what Notmyrealname said!

Southend1 wrote: »

It is normally sufficient to point out why you find someone's opinion offensive to stop them from saying something to upset you in future. You don't need to change their opinion. Or if you do, it should be done through conversation and informed debate rather than by kicking them out on the street.

Why should it be done that way? What has normally got to do with it? If you have three dates with someone with polar opposite to yours on key issues do you continue to date and chat to them or do you politely decline their next offer? I terminated a date once because the guy was racist and it disgusted me, was I wrong?

It's not for us to tell the OP how sensitive they should be when we don't even know what the comment was. For all we know the lodger is an active member of the National Front. For all we know the OP has a relative or friend who has been beaten for the colour of their skin, or works in a field where it would be damaging to have even a mildly racist housemate.

Not saying something offensive in your presence but continuing to be racist in word or deed elsewhere only stops your feelings being hurt, it doesn't make any difference in the world, doesn't stop others getting hurt. Sometimes it is necessary to change someone's view or adopt a zero tolerance attitude.

bigmaz

Its totally true about the double standards. I know of people that get offended easily with regards to race, but will happily sit and joke about someone thats ginger. Whats the difference?

propertyman

We don't know what was said- but we do know from the OP that the lodger felt that it was open to interpretation rather than an clear statement eg all X's are Y.

I suspect that the disgust is about their different opinions rather than a truly racist comment.

He could have said we clearly disagree on the subject and not discuss it in future, which is a mature and even handed way to deal with matters when it is not unlawful to hold an opinion, only what we do with them.

bitemebankers

J_i_m wrote: »

Could the OP's take on this alleged racism really be that "cut & dried"

In the absence of any other information I think we have to take the OP at their word and address the main point of the post, which was about whether a notice period was mandatory because of the lodger had paid a month in advance.

But we all need to be careful on how we judge others whose morals don't perfectly align with our own.

This isn't a question of one person's morals aligning with someone else's. It's an issue of one person having moral (and legal) standards and another person simply lacking them. You can be as broadminded as you like but racism is always wrong and always unacceptable.

propertyman

bigmaz wrote: »

Its totally true about the double standards. I know of people that get offended easily with regards to race, but will happily sit and joke about someone thats ginger.
Whats the difference?

Er Red hair and Skin Colour ?

I do have close friend who is Jamaican and was married to a Redhead.
His son has typical tight curled hair, but with a tint of red and he freckles in the sun.

bitemebankers

One thing is certain, the ex-lodger will definitely think twice before spouting racist comments in future. Better still, being evicted might even make them consider why they hold those racist views. I think the OP is to be applauded.

propertyman

bitemebankers wrote: »

In the absence of any other information I think we have to take the OP at their word and address the main point of the post, which was about whether a notice period was mandatory because of the lodger had paid a month in advance.

This isn't a question of one person's morals aligning with someone else's. It's an issue of one person having moral (and legal) standards and another person simply lacking them. You can be as broadminded as you like but racism is always wrong and always unacceptable.

Nonsense- in that case the thread would have been;

" I have a lodger and we disagreed over something that I found offensive- what is the minimum notice for someone who pays a month in advance and we have not signed an agreement"

No need to mention race at all.... that's how you deal with racism, not spouting off about it.

bigmaz

bitemebankers wrote: »

It's an issue of one person having moral (and legal) standards and another person simply lacking them.

There is a huge leap between those 2 kinds of people. Who decides wether a mild remark is offensive or not? If you have someone coming into your house telling you (as another poster put it) all X's are Y's, then yeah fair enough, that is blatent racism. If this was put into practise for everything, not just racism, then you would struggle to find anyone thats not offensive about something.

bigmaz

propertyman wrote: »

Er Red hair and Skin Colour ?

Arent you clever :rotfl: