evicting a racist lodger

bitemebankers

Notmyrealname wrote: »

If such a thing causes you so much grief then taking in a lodger is not for you because you're looking for a lodger that doesn't exist

What complete twaddle. Most civilised people regard racism as very offensive and I wouldn't hesitate to evict a lodger who spouted racism. As several others have said, you don't need to give any notice and you're perfectly within your rights, both legally and morally, to evict an offensive lodger.

Southend1

bitemebankers wrote: »

What complete twaddle. Most civilised people regard racism as very offensive and I wouldn't hesitate to evict a lodger who spouted racism. As several others have said, you don't need to give any notice and you're perfectly within your rights, both legally and morally, to evict an offensive lodger.

I think notmyrealname has a valid point here. The point being not that racism is not generally considered offensive, but that people can be unintentionally offensive to others in many ways; therefore someone who is prone to taking offence at things other people say probably wouldn't make a successful live-in landlord.

bitemebankers

Southend1 wrote: »

I think notmyrealname has a valid point here. The point being not that racism is not generally considered offensive, but that people can be unintentionally offensive to others in many ways; therefore someone who is prone to taking offence at things other people say probably wouldn't make a successful live-in landlord.

No, I really don't think he/she does have a point. We're not talking about someone who is merely inept, foolish or otherwise unintentionally offensive. Making racist comments is *criminally* offensive and nobody should have to put up with it, especially in their own home. I'm pretty broad-minded about other people's opinions but I draw the line at racism and homophobia.

societys_child

Trouble is, we've no idea what this racist remark was.
There have been instances on these forums where one poster has screamed racist at another poster when in fact, what they actually said was in no way racist.

DRP

bitemebankers wrote: »

No, I really don't think he/she does have a point. We're not talking about someone who is merely inept, foolish or otherwise unintentionally offensive. Making racist comments is *criminally* offensive and nobody should have to put up with it, especially in their own home. I'm pretty broad-minded about other people's opinions but I draw the line at racism and homophobia.

You seem very sure!

This is a difficult one because without knowing what was said and in what context, there is not much to go on.

Some people are very easily offended and/or don't 'get' an ironic or humorous throwaway comment - especially when between relative strangers

Fire_Fox

Notmyrealname wrote: »

If such a thing causes you so much grief then taking in a lodger is not for you because you're looking for a lodger that doesn't exist - one 100% entirely in agreement with everything you believe, your ideals, your morals.

My advice to you is not to take in any other lodger. All lodgers will say or do something you don't like or agree with. If you're going to punt someone out on the street for one comment and having a difference of opinion over something, having lodgers is not for you. All you will do is end up ruining a string of perfectly innocent people's lives as they leave their home to move in with you only for you to kick them out the first time they say a word you don't agree with.

Don't be ridiculous, the OP neither said nor intimated she wanted someone "100% entirely in agreement" with her on every issue. Everyone has friends or partners that have different viewpoints and opinions or morals, but some are total dealbreakers when you meet new people. Different levels of different prejudices are more or less offensive for different people. I have lived with people I knew were selling recreational substances on a small scale with no junkies at or near the house - that would be an instant deal breaker for many.

I have known of several 'co-op' houses where the majority of occupants are vegetarian or vegan and all are buying fair trade, involved in environmental and community issues, they manage fine finding housemates that have similar strong views to them. There are plenty of shared houses where all occupants are Muslim or Jewish. These households work because there are like minded people out there or because they don't sweat the smaller stuff.

bigmaz

bitemebankers wrote: »

No, I really don't think he/she does have a point. We're not talking about someone who is merely inept, foolish or otherwise unintentionally offensive. Making racist comments is *criminally* offensive and nobody should have to put up with it, especially in their own home. I'm pretty broad-minded about other people's opinions but I draw the line at racism and homophobia.

We cannot really comment if we don't know what was actually said. You can get 2 very respectful and decent people, and one could find one thing acceptable and the other not. Even ethnic people could find things not offensive but a white person does. The OP took on this person, I am assuming on the basis that they act and talk like a respectful person. So assuming it wasnt a totally out of order thing to say, it sounds like the OP is being too sensitive, and will be offended by any person coming to stay.

Southend1

bitemebankers wrote: »

No, I really don't think he/she does have a point. We're not talking about someone who is merely inept, foolish or otherwise unintentionally offensive. Making racist comments is *criminally* offensive and nobody should have to put up with it, especially in their own home. I'm pretty broad-minded about other people's opinions but I draw the line at racism and homophobia.

I'm in no way condoning racism or homophobia but people do make silly and ill informed comments on these issues and I don't think it's appropriate to take an immediate and extreme reaction like kicking out a lodger in this kind of case. Of course, the OP doesn't say exactly what was said and it could indeed have been much more serious than I am imagining. However, as a gay man myself, I have often come across casual homophobia and prefercalmly to explain why people may be offended by the remark rather than jump to extremes. This normally has the desired effect.

Fire_Fox

Southend1 wrote: »

I think notmyrealname has a valid point here. The point being not that racism is not generally considered offensive, but that people can be unintentionally offensive to others in many ways; therefore someone who is prone to taking offence at things other people say probably wouldn't make a successful live-in landlord.

You think this was a valid point based on the evidence at hand? "you're looking for a lodger that doesn't exist - one 100% entirely in agreement with everything you believe, your ideals, your morals."

Southend1

Fire_Fox wrote: »

You think this was a valid point based on the evidence at hand? "you're looking for a lodger that doesn't exist - one 100% entirely in agreement with everything you believe, your ideals, your morals."

What I am saying is that people have different views on many things. My opinion on this is that it is healthy in a democratic society for different views to proliferate. However, we all should be mindful of other people's views and potential to cause them offence.

It is normally sufficient to point out why you find someone's opinion offensive to stop them from saying something to upset you in future. You don't need to change their opinion. Or if you do, it should be done through conversation and informed debate rather than by kicking them out on the street.

Of course, if they are not willing to either a) stop saying things you find offensive or b) engage in constructive debate on the subject, then kicking them out may be appropriate!