Messy sibling (vent)

londonsurrey

I agree with doing the minimum to get your environment acceptable - bag it up and dump it in her room, cat soaked things, bags, shoes, duvet, etc.

You've got two problems here - a messy sibling, and the bringer upper of the sibling, who is allowing her to continue like this.

newcook

Im another in favour of dumping it all on her bed – if her room is already messy then its up to her to tidy/clean it. If she doesn’t bother cleaning it then that’s her problem if it starts to smell (just make sure her door is kept closed!)

Why should the rest of the house look like a bombsite just because of one person?!

podperson

I would agree with the dumping all her stuff in her room and tidy the rest so your mum doesn't have to come home to a tip.
Going forward - tbh I wouldn't say that 'leaving her to it and she'll get the idea' is going to work, some people just don't see mess as a problem. My OH can be the same way, I'll ask him when he's going to clear up this and that - and he just looks round like it's the first time he's noticed it was there!!
Maybe you and mum could both sit down with her, make a list of chores that need doing and then split them between you all. If you're both constantly moaning about the place being a mess she's probably just zoning out - whereas if you say, 'it's now your job to do x, y and z every week' then she might respond better.

Melaniep101

OP, your sister sounds indentical to my 18 year old daughter. The most frustrating thing about it is that she (my daughter) doesn't care about living in a mess, so even if I dump all the stuff left strewn about the place in her room, it just tends to stay there until I end up having a fit about it!

Every day I come in from work to find shoes, bags, college books, umbrella's etc dumped in our hallway, so I feel your pain!

I just can't understand how people can live like slobs, and particularly my daughter's case, she's been brought up in a spotless home!

I agree with the other posters, just shovel up everything thats her's, including the cat pee soaked stuff, and bung it in her room, close the door and try and forget about it. It's only a matter of time before the smell of cat pee gets to her!

And my cat is a pukey cat too, hes so greedy, he wolfs down his food then promptly yacks up everywhere. What a delight he is.

HeadAboveWater

Melaniep101 wrote: »

OP, your sister sounds indentical to my 18 year old daughter. The most frustrating thing about it is that she (my daughter) doesn't care about living in a mess, so even if I dump all the stuff left strewn about the place in her room, it just tends to stay there until I end up having a fit about it!

...and my OHs DD1 (17yo)

If we leave clean clothes in a neat pile in her room for her to put away, it usually ends up on the floor in the middle of the dirty stuff. And I'll assume it's the floor. We can't actually see through all the clothes/makeup/hair stuffs.....

We keep her door closed tight at all times. The smell of fake tan/perfume/boost etc turns our stomachs

The rest of the house is spotless and very pleasant to live in

And yes. Dump her mess in her room. If she doesn't notice with all the other mess already there, then so be it.

I'm sure your mum is proud to have a daughter like you

Judith_W

Another vote for just dumping her stuff in her room. If she doesn't notice then problem solved! Happy all round : )

onlyroz

You can't make her be tidy so you should dump her stuff in her room and forget about it, then make the rest of the house presentable. You shouldn't let the state of her room bother you - as long as the door is closed you'll never have to see it.

The same goes for any dirty pots left on the side - dump in the room and forget about them. If she persists with this until all the crockery in the house is gone then make her get paper plates, or put a lock on the cupboard with your own plates/pans in.

If sis is not pulling her weight around the house then stop doing anything for her until she shapes up. So no cooking, no laundry, no lifts, no loans of a tenner when she's broke, or whatever else it is that you might do for her as a favour.

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Where did the stuff end up?

Room or bin?


And did she kick up a fuss about it?

lizziebell*80

One of the girls I shared with in halls at uni was like this, total slob without any idea of how gross it was. She also used to be mega clumsy and tread on the glasses she left on the floor and break them all the time. I got so annoyed at the amount of junk in the communal area of hers that it all went in bin bags and got dumped outside her hole of a room- it would have been put in the room if it was open. I don't think she was best pleased though! It is just selfish, didn't care what she did in her own space but it's not fair to inflict her ming on everyone else and it is super lazy, everyone is busy, but as long as things aren't left to fester, it doesn't take long to tidy quickly.

lizziebell*80

I like the suggestion about giving her a cleaning bill