How do you deal with lies and liars?

DVardysShadow

make_me_wise wrote: »

The reason she is doing this, is because all the while you are in your sons life, she knows that one day he will learn the truth about her. That she lied to you and let you believe he was your son for years and years then did all she could to remove you from his life. Not an easy thing to have to answer to with your child when they are old enough to have an opinion on it all. I wouldn't want to be in her shoes in 15-20 years time.

Keep fighting this. Let the lies gradually unravel themselves and stay strong for a little boy you love dearly. A judge has already recognised that you are a positive part of the childs life and deserve to play a role in it.

Conduct yourself through the fight you face with dignity and composure. Never slate your sons mum no matter how justified you may be. Your son will form his own opinions of her by himself in time. Your reward will be your sons respect of you in years to come and the relationship you will share with him.

I think your user name is past its sell by date.

vanderlyle

DVardysShadow wrote: »

I think your user name is past its sell by date.

Couldn't agree more!

Thank you everyone!

shegirl

OP,liars trip themselves up eventually to anyone with half a working brain.It's not nice to have to deal with it and it's only natural to try and defend yourself when you hear such things.It hurts!

I don't envy your situation at all,it sounds an awful mess.

Ride out the social services work,they have to do it.

Good luck with it all,it's a very difficult situation and you have that boy in your heart and that's pretty special

ineed

Just wanted to wish you good luck OP. i can't add any more than has already been said really just wanted to say I kind of know how you feel. I have first hand experience of a liar like this, it was a family member. They had munchausens syndrome, we were all disgusted with them and their life long lies and actions and eventually had enough and have now cut all contact. Be strong, the truth will out.

ruby-roo_2

vanderlyle wrote: »

In the past 2 years I have been accused of the worst things imaginable by my ex, and she has told so many lies about me to various people, including doctors, psychiatrists, social workers, and the police.

The emptiest vessels make the greatest noise.

All she will eventually achieve by doing this, to the man who her son sees as his dad, is to push him away. She will rue the day that she told so many lies to and about you. It is then that your son will need you more than ever so keep fighting for him.

HeadAboveWater

:T again to what make me wise says. Def hit the nail on the head on that one.

To confirm I am my sons psychological father and have parental responsibility, as recognised by the court. I am simply not demanding access to someone elses child, this little boy is my son.

No matter where she takes him, no matter what happens, no matter what lies she tells, no matter about any of that stuff...

he is your son

vanderlyle

I would just like to say a big THANK YOU to everyone who has responded to me. I had never used a forum before and cannot believe that there are so many people out there who would take the time out of their busy lives to say some kind words of help and support to someone who is essentially a stranger.

Yesterday I was feeling like there was no where else to turn, I'm on antidepressants and on a 9 month waiting list (1 month left to wait!) with Mind as this whole situation had gotten on top of me. I felt so bogged down with nowhere to vent.

This morning I've woken up in a much more positive mood, thanks to everyone here, I dont feel like I'm going insane and you've confirmed that I'm on the right track.

Thanks again

sassyblue

Let me tell you about my ex brother in law vanderlyle..... he was a control freak and treated my sister abysmally, but played the 'big caring father' when it suited him.

Lots of things went on but if l just fast forward 20 years and tell you he has two sons in very good jobs that don't bother with him because they're old enough now to see through the lies, it should make you feel happier. Both boys now see that their father is a waste of space, it was hard while they grew up not knowing who to believe (although my sister never bad mouthed the father, HE would fill their heads with rubbish) but now they can.

The roles are reversed in your situation, but the truth does always out and she will trip herself up, get bored or find another man to annoy and you will still be there a positive force and a dad to your son.

Remember: some people are only alive because it's illegal to kill them.

xxx

HeadAboveWater

sassyblue wrote: »

Remember: some people are only alive because it's illegal to kill them.

*texts frantically* (sending this line to OH...)

vanderlyle

HeadAboveWater wrote: »

*texts frantically* (sending this line to OH...)

That is the best line I've ever heard! :rotfl: