How much would you spend/did you spend on your wedding?

stir_crazy

I agree that some people go all out on the wedding without thinking about the marriage. This isnt true in all cases, I was the type of person who would never get married, as in my view a marriage was only a piece of paper. Then I met my OH and realised that marriage is a commitment that I want to make to him, to show him that I wanted to apend the rest of my life with him. Yes, some people spend a lot of money, and like daisiegg (and other posters) have said, if you're not getting into deep debt over it then why not? In my area, its generally not possible to get married for much cheaper than we're spending, unless we go for a dark, dingy, old fashioned hotel with crusty carpeting. We've saved up and gotten the best that we could get for the price that we're paying. I certainly wouldnt like for my guests to be thinking "well, they've paid a pretty penny for this - I'll give them a year at most!"

lil_miss_insanity

joannaspanner wrote: »

I have found with people I know, that the more they spend on the wedding, the least amount of time the marriage lasts.

Each to their own, but like my ex friend, I find it ludicrous when you spend money you don't have, just so you can be a PWINCESS for the day.

I think that's the crux of the issue. There is a big distinction between spending more on the wedding, and spending more than you can afford. I don't think the more you spend the shorter it would last, necessarily, but of course those that want a wedding more than a marriage, are the ones who have difficulties later.

There is a school of thought (which I'm coming around to myself) that you only do it once, so don't want to regret skimping on things. Some people don't give a damn whether their venue's chairs match or whether they have a make-up artist in the morning of their wedding. Every individual has different priorities. Some people see no value in owning a home, as they're quite happy renting, or move about a lot. Some people don't care about foreign holidays. Others would prefer to save their money for drink and fags. We are all unique.

If someone chooses to spend £50k on a wedding celebration, and they prioritise that over something else, or have enough spare to do it without compromise, fair play to them. If someone chooses to spend £500 on a wedding, and prioritise their money for a house deposit or holiday, fair play to them. If someone can only afford £1k, and manage to get a £2k wedding for that, especially fair play to them. Each to their own.

It may seem alien to us how another chooses to prioritise their finances, but I think certain language used to describe their incomprehension of these priorities occasionally offends those that think differently about their money. Hope that makes sense without causing more offence.

Faith177

My friends did their wedding on a shoestring. They only had 5K to play with they got nearly everything from EBay ect.

The brides dress didn't fit her properly and didn't suit her at all. At the end of the night all the guest had to help clean up the hall so they could get their deposit back.

1 year 8 months down the line they are now divorced!

So sometimes doing a shoestring wedding doesn't mean it'll last any longer.

As I already said I'm spending 20K we have had minor help but 95% of it has been paid for by us. Yes we have cut back on things but we deserve this day. As a couple we have been through hell & back the last couple of years and having a big wedding and spoiling our guests is our way of saying thank you to all those who have supported us during our difficult times. Plus I only plan on doing this once and I want no regrets later and thinking oh I wish I had, had this or I wish I had done this ect

Granted one of the biggest expendiatures was my dress at £3.5K but I saved for this myself as I thought it was selfish to take it our of the joint savings when OH suit is being hired for £100 lol

Idiophreak

stir_crazy wrote: »

I certainly wouldnt like for my guests to be thinking "well, they've paid a pretty penny for this - I'll give them a year at most!"

I don't think any normal person does this, though...any more so than people go around saying "this didn't cost much...I hope they care more about their marriage than they do their wedding!".

Most people are just honoured to be invited to a wedding and do their best to make it a great day for the lucky couple, irrespective of the amount of money that's been spent.

catalunya

I have found this thread a really interesting read and it is fascinating hearing others opinions.

I am a moneysaver, anything I do I try to find it cheaper first. I even told my fiance not to buy a ring for me unless it was a deal! lol!

My Aunt got married in 2000 and spend 10k and from what I remember it was a nice day - she worked to keep the cost down by doing things like buying dress material and getting a local seamtress to make the bridesmaid dresses.

My cousin got married in 2010, spent £15k (paid for by my Aunt and Uncle - not the same as the one above! lol) and I am pretty sure my cousin wouldn't have spent that if she had had to pay for it on her own.

We are getting married in Dec 2013 and I have set our budget out at £10,800 excluding HM. I myself am saving up for this (my fiance is saving for our next house deposit), my parents have contributed £2k, leaving me 9k to save and I am saving £550 a month to do this which is about 40% of my monthly wage. This a high proportion, but I am willing to scarifice somethings in order to do it. Saving at such a high rate will also mean I have the money 8 months before the wedding, leaving time to save more if anything crops up.

We could spend more and could spend less. But I was keen to see if I could do it for between 10-11k to see if 13 years later with inflation, recession etc I could match my Aunts budget. We'll be about 1k over that but I dont think thats bad!

alwaysonthego_2

I am getting married next week and it came in under 3K for 120 people.

My dress and accessories £250
His suit and accessories £120
bridesmaids x 4 £120
hair £30.00
makeup £40
wedding at registry ofice £300
venue £75
buffet £500
chocolate fountain and casino £520
ring- £200
table decs £50 (includes delivery to venue)
vintage car £150
cake £55
pa hire £120 (includes delivery and set up)

His parents have bought bubbly for the first drink and my best friend is making the cake and another is taking the photos

stir_crazy

Idiophreak wrote: »

I don't think any normal person does this, though...any more so than people go around saying "this didn't cost much...I hope they care more about their marriage than they do their wedding!".

Most people are just honoured to be invited to a wedding and do their best to make it a great day for the lucky couple, irrespective of the amount of money that's been spent.

The point that I was making is that if the couple have made a serious commitment to each other to work at the marriage, then it doesnt matter how much that the couple have spent on the wedding (the last comment was in response to the poster above my last post who said that out of the people they knew, the more expensive the wedding, the shorter the marriage).

Idiophreak

stir_crazy wrote: »

The point that I was making is that if the couple have made a serious commitment to each other to work at the marriage, then it doesnt matter how much that the couple have spent on the wedding (the last comment was in response to the poster above my last post who said that out of the people they knew, the more expensive the wedding, the shorter the marriage).

I know...and I wasn't arguing with you. I was just pointing out that this is quite an extreme board and that the opinions expressed on here, in whatever direction, aren't typical of what happens in "real life"...and I absolutely agree that, in the sense they mean, there's no correlation between the cost of the wedding and the length of the marriage.

(statistically, I'm sure this claim's supported...as weddings in the past, on average, cost less than weddings now...so the longer ago you got married - and hence the length of your marriage - the less your wedding was likely to have cost).

stir_crazy

Idiophreak wrote: »

(statistically, I'm sure this claim's supported...as weddings in the past, on average, cost less than weddings now...so the longer ago you got married - and hence the length of your marriage - the less your wedding was likely to have cost).

Very true.... I stand corrected

trinity_enigma

I have been glued to this thread with interest and find it quite surreal that people think its fine to judge what other people spend their money on. It's quite odd when you think about it.

We have a budget of £8000 for our wedding and at the moment it looks like we're coming in on budget. Some might think this is a lot to spend and yes it does mean we have had to cut back but not to the extreme. If anything having such a large spend has made us much better at being MSE. We don't have children or pets do after paying the mortgage and bills we have been free to spend rather than save.

We are now getting quite used to saving money and not buying something as soon as we see it, using lovefilm rather than going to the flicks every week, using quidco etc.

Remember you don't know anything about anyone else's lives so it's probably best not to judge.