when you reach breaking point

Popperwell

threemuttleys wrote: »

((hugs))

I am genuinely dreading this. I know it will happen for my son too:(:(:(:(:(:(

So true threemuttleys...

Popperwell

adelight wrote: »

gailey what can I say? don't think an mse e-hug is really enough. You are exactly the type of family I worry about, you work hard but still struggle and are left to fend for yourselves. Look into the open university as they aim to make their whole degrees cost the same as one year at a conventional uni and your existing degree may enable you to skip a few modules and therefore save a few quid.
monnagran that is so sad
Like people are saying, at least a lot of us have our families around us though. One of my very wealthy school friends saw her Dad one weekend a month and was practically raised by nannies but thought it was ok as it meant they could have a fancy house, horses, private education for some siblings etc. I would rather have a Dad than a horse

I agree with the whole post but especially the last paragraph and when you no longer have a Mum and Dad a light goes out of your life...but you try to hang onto how fortunate you were if you had a close realationship.

gailey_2

threemuttleys wrote: »

((hugs))

I am genuinely dreading this. I know it will happen for my son too:(:(:(:(:(:(

Not sure how old your son is? but having 3-4including stepson.

They never remember from one yer to next what they were given or who gave what.

Even when we buy less my family go and buy them loads s they the only kids .

I work hard especilly at xmas at building memories

so we go xmas markets to browse
outdoor iceskating
carol concert, nativity, school fetes.
we see 1 sometimes 2santas.
This year havent managed to go recent years westonbirt as they have enchanted forest full of light.
But my girls love wrapping up warm and looking at lights on peopes houses some go littke ott round here but oh well their leccy bill:D
The pound shops sell xmas craft sets, we make paper chains and homemade cards

The kitchen I make hm mince pies, cookies and mini quiches.

the fruit bowls full tasty satsumas and nuts

xmas day we see mil .she wont come over ours.
xmas day we dont have turkey as too costly.

we either have goose, duck or chicken
sometimes a combination.
we possibly spends near enough same amount but the same price gets us leg of lamb too think turkeys gone stupidly expensive,

we make pressies for family.
we go a distance to visit my family who dont see kids much troughout the year. My aunt always does lovley tea time spread and everyone goes as we all moved away its lovley to all be together.

so despite lack of money and flash pressies the kids hopefully will have fond memories of xmas.

I think the pressies come when they in school and when in teens.
when they young kids enjoy the easyness of buying for them.
mine never realise their presents are not brand new.
They also oddly appreciate clothes.

This year im making my own advent calender but they also have cheap choc one from poundshop.

sorry if sounded more depressed than I am.
Im fine most days. week before payday I can be grouchy.

Popperwell

I have been accused of being depressed or feeling down(by some on my blog)and when you write it down it sometimes looks worse than it is or how you feel...

You build those memories and make the most of them Gailey...

I can't do that any more and this Christmas will be sad I know it will but I'll try and do a Christmas meal for myself and still listen to the Christmas Music and try not to get too down...

I have a box of christmas crackers I would have pulled with Mum, now they will sit there unused...and come New Year I'll probably be tucked up in bed when it strikes midnight!

It's coming around to almost a year when Mum was found out to be ill so its a strange time...

This time last year Mum heard the story of the horrible killings by that guy in Norway...and this time I hear the conclusion to the court case and she'll never know...Life is strange...

monnagran

I do agree with all posters who say that magical memories can be made without much money. I know. We did it. My sons, now grown up with children of their own, talk of their brilliant childhood, and feel sorry for people who weren't as lucky. My youngest son doesn't even remember the ride-on toys episode. It's me who has the bruised heart. That same son does remember how all his friends envied his unique bike. Little did they know that it was made out of bits of 2 other bikes! Likewise they both remember how they and all the boys in the neighbourhood got together and built a superb BMX quarter pipe in our back garden. It was - through the gate, down the drive, round the corner of the house, across the lawn - avoiding the washing line - up the pipe and down into the potato bed. Apparently all their friends remember it too and I can just imagine all these respectable 40+ yearolds sitting in the pub reminiscing about our BMX track. It didn't do the garden much good, lets just say that Chelsea wouldn't have been interested, but OH! the memories.

I must leave memory lane and go and wash up.

maryb

threemuttleys, don't worry too much. The things you can foresee you can guard against. I told my children that Father Christmas only gives the stockings and Mummy and Daddy give the big presents. Sometimes parents like to get Father Christmas to deliver the big presents as well but they have to pay him. Children are very accepting that parents will always do the best they can and it may not be as much as other children get.

It's the grief you don't foresee and that you can't stop in time that hurts you as a mother - isn't that right Monnagran? That doesn't necessarily have anything to do with how much you can give them, almost the reverse. They need to feel loved first and foremost. Gailey is right to work on memories

GreyQueen

monnagran, my heart went ouch in sympathy about your feelings about the ride on toy incident. How telling that it hurt you and not him and how lovely that your grown children think they had a wonderful childhood.

I think that about my own. The only think I can remember wanting with a passion and never getting was a Space Hopper, of all the daft things!

((((gailey)))) you do so much with your children that I feel awe and exhaustion just reading about it. I bet they think you're the best Mum ever. Raising children is tough and tougher still when money's tight but you're a strong and loving woman and you will come through this patch into calmer waters and easier times, I'm sure of it.

I'm enjoying the simple pleasures this evening; a borrowed PC in the family home and the company of a cat who is busily putting her fur to rights after a self-inflicted soaking. Well, she chose to be out in the rain when she could have come in through an open window at any time.

Sorry can't bold your usernames as is my habit as this PC has a foible of not wanting to hightlight anything less than a paragraph at a time and I'm jiggered if I know why.

Laters, GQ x

gettingready

Last Xmas, my daughter got bits and pieces for me, her then b/f and my mum who was visiting.

She, my daughter - got absolutely NOTHING from anyone of us.

I will never ever forget last Xmas.

I was on JSA then but still - that was the worst Xmas ever and... hope it never ever happens again.

She said she did not mind but...

COOLTRIKERCHICK

We are rearing our own Turkeys this year... bought them for £4 each, and growing them on. Went to the farm auction, and our size turkeys were going for £10 - £12 each.

Hubby has taken on of our cockerals to a friends house, so he can show him how to 'dispatch' a bird, so hope he is ok with it.

If everything goes ok, you can pick up cockerals for free or for between 50 - £1 at the farm auctions, so If hubby can 'do it' them we do have the option to cut our food budget a bit more..( sorry if this upsets peeps, but its being realistic, )

Going to plant some spuds this weekend in containers in the greenhouse for christmas not going to use seed pots, going to try the sprouting pots from the sack

monnagran

CTC: I'm doing the same thing. I've never bothered with new potatoes for Christmas before, but after reading how short fresh veg is going to be this winter, I thought I'd have a go. I'm planting mine in bags close to the house as if it's wet or slippery it's difficult to get down to the garden.

I was tempted by some cabbage plants in the market but I've never tried growing them in bags. If they are still there next week I may relent and try them.