Lost everything now.

Saturnalia

Got home tonight and found out I have 3 months to move out. Landlady's boyfriend has found himself in a sticky sitch with his own flat so he's moving in here.

That's everything over for me. I have no steady job, no close friends here, no partner, no money & now no home.

I don't know what to do, I feel utterly abandoned. My life falls apart every time something seems to be going well. No-one cares, I'm not worth keeping in any way. No-one can help, no-one can hug me and say it'll be okay, no-one will offer their sofa, no-one will say "I love you and I'm staying".

I have a cat and few rented places allow pets so I'll have to leave her for the happy couple to enjoy while I come home to an empty flat.

It's all over.

madison-nyc

sorry to hear your having a tough time. there must be somewhere else you can rent if your managing to pay your rent now? you've got three months , i'm sure you'll find somewhere where you can take your cat too , most landlords don't mind one cat.

raven83

Awww I didn't want to read and run, I just wanted to send you (((((HUGS))))), can't imagine what you are going through in your circumstances, thought I have felt completely desolate myself and I think quite a few people have at some point, just remember you're not along. I wish you luck x

the_pink_panther_2

Noooo... Please don't feel so sad. I know it's easy for me to say, but it will get better. How old are you? what about your family? it's true, it's not as easy to find a flat which will allow pets but they DO exist. If you are feeling so isolated as you sound then, well it's just that leaving your cat might not be best for you... :-( It will get better; think of it this way, perhaps in your new location you will meet new people, and then in yourself it will make you feel better, see it as a fresh start, sometimes making changes is easiest when you are beginning something new, it sounds as though you're not entirely happy with your life as it is, perhaps this is what you need (I know it doesn't feel like it) but it could be a bit of a blessing in (a very bad) disguise...

amyloofoo

:grouphug: I know things feel terrible now, but maybe it's an opportunity for something better? I'm sure you'll find somewhere that will be happy to take your cat, I don't think most landlords would mind one well behaved moggy. I know it must be horrible to be told you have to move because someone else is having a tough time, but you'll find somewhere new and it might be a chance for something really good. Don't you have any friends or family local?

Saturnalia

It's not. This was a place I felt secure & like I belonged and that last remaining scrap is now gone. There's nothing left. I could bawl the whole night (probably will) and no-one will hear or care. I'm unemployable, unloveable and have no friends. If I stopped breathing it wouldn't matter to a soul, in fact I'd be a problem solved.

amyloofoo

Saturnalia wrote: »

It's not. This was a place I felt secure & like I belonged and that last remaining scrap is now gone. There's nothing left. I could bawl the whole night (probably will) and no-one will hear or care. I'm unemployable, unloveable and have no friends. If I stopped breathing it wouldn't matter to a soul, in fact I'd be a problem solved.

Awww hun. Don't sit and cry, please give the Samaritans a call, even if they can't do anything concrete to help, sometimes just having someone to cry to can put things into perspective. No-one's unloveable, and a landlady having boyfriend problems certainly doesn't prove that; I know things feel awful, and it's been a sh!tty day, but please try to focus on something positive

Saturnalia

They aren't having any problems, they're moving in together! They have a great life and fun relationship, now they're going to have one bought flat and around 80k joint income, and here's me with nothing to show for my existence but loneliness, misery & everything going wrong time after time after time. I'm so tired of it all, always being on the end of the bad luck.

determined_new_ms

I went through a really rough time in my life and it lasted for years, it was horrible, I couldn't see anyway out and many a night I contemplated ending it all. But my life changed and now it is 100% better. Things can and do get better the only thing you can count on in life is change.

Can you ask your family for some support & help? Can you go speak to your doctor? You sound depressed and might need some support in this. Also are there many jobs in your area? Obviously some areas are more effected by the recession than others. Can you reconnect with some old friends? Or there are social meet up groups in most towns now where single people can meet others.

ali-t

Saturnalia, unless you change the way you think to a more positive way, it is going to be difficult for you to see the good in any situation. Times like these are for looking for silver linings.

If you were posting just to vent, don't read any more of this post as you won't want to read positive and practical stuff.

Apply for lots of jobs all over the UK, you have the freedom to do this as you are not tied down to a property in a long lease or in a house with negative equity. You have freedom and for that, many many people in the world will be jealous.

If you have no close friends or partner in the area, there is nothing stopping you moving elsewhere. You have another thread about changing the way you look to attract a new man in your life. There is absolutely nothing to stop you starting again elsewhere as the person you would like to be if the negativity and self doubt didn't get in the way.

Many landlords accept cats, this should not be a problem when getting somewhere new to stay. You should try looking for somewhere to stay when, like me you have a rottweiler and a staffie! There tends to be 'no room at the inn' if you know what I mean.

Oh, and finally there is no such thing as bad luck. People make their own luck. A more positive person would see this as a boot up the bum to get the life they want and deserve. Wallowing in pity won't get you anywhere.

Why do you consider yourself to be unemployable? Maybe you are just looking at the wrong jobs for your skillset and personality.

Have you looked at the online CBT programme living life to the full? It is a great way to help change the way you think. You have nothing to lose by giving it a go http://www.llttf.com/

Like I said at the beginning if you are on here to vent just ignore this

Saturnalia

I don't want freedom though, I want to be settled and to belong.