wives, how would you react if....

Taadaa

Although I would understand where my husband was coming from if he suggested this to me, it would set alarm bells ringing despite me having no reason to feel that he is not trustworthy.

I suppose although I realise wearing a ring would not stop some men wanting to cheat and some women flirting on an occasion such as a stag do, the fact that he was not wearing a ring would make him seem even more fair game...and he would be opening himself up to getting into trouble. Despite having the will to say no, I wouldn't feel comfortable with him doing that.

If the situation was the other way around, he certainly would not be happy at all.

You are far more likely to damage the glasses as they are removed/could be left somewhere etc, and are not as robust as the ring, so they aren't really comparable. Which might add to my suspicions.

Taadaa

zaffi wrote: »

Also i don't really care how many women believe my rationale. My wife does and her view is the only one i care about.

I started this thread out of curiousity and it's played out much as i'd thought.

Rational people saying it's a piece of metal it plays no part in dictating whether someone is going to cheat

And reactionary people drawing potentially on bad situations in their own lives to say i'm going to cheat or want to cheat

And LondonSurrey and their phych 101 which was as off the mark as it was hilarious

I don't understand...your original post seemed like you were canvassing opinion ahead of planning to ask your wife this question. If you were just curious perhaps you should have said so in your original post. And if you don't care then why are you curious? If you want to congratulate yourself on having such an understanding wife, you hardly need to come on here and get our opinion on it.

zaffi

Taadaa wrote: »

I don't understand...your original post seemed like you were canvassing opinion ahead of planning to ask your wife this question. If you were just curious perhaps you should have said so in your original post. And if you don't care then why are you curious? If you want to congratulate yourself on having such an understanding wife, you hardly need to come on here and get our opinion on it.

The bit about not caring who believed my rationale was a direct response to someone saying that "most women wouldn't" effectively insinuating that i had ulterior motives, which i don't. So i think that was as measured a response as it could be given the insinuation.


I said i didn't care if people believed the reasoning, I did care(and hence why i posed the question) to peoples views on what could and was an interesting topic. I am curious again as to why you think peoples responses would have been different had i said it was out of curiousity rather than wanting advice?

However, peoples views would not have effected what i was going to do in the situation. I knew how my wife would react to the question and she laughed at some of the more "out there" and assumptive posts. i simply used her as specific example as a means to frame the more general question.

As it is I'll probably take the ring and tape it up during the day so if we're near water there's no issue.

What has been extremely interesting but undeniably predictable is some of the hysterical responses. Ranging from those who think it'd mean their man was going to or had cheated on them to those who would see the attendance to a stag in and of itself as a form of betrayal.

And finally the psych 101 from londonsurrey was hilarious, i've mentioned this in a few posts but just can't help myself. :rotfl:

minerva_windsong

I'm with those who said better a cheap ring than no ring at all if you're worried about it getting lost. I got engaged in June and my fiance and I are going travelling for eight months from September, so as I was worried about the possibility of my engagement ring getting lost or nicked on the road (for the sentimental value more than anything else) we bought a similar but cheaper ring from Argos for me to wear when we go away.

My fiance has said he wants to wear a wedding ring and if he was worried about losing it on a stag do (which I'd have no problems with him going on I should add) or indeed on any kind of trip/holiday then I'd be encouraging him to do something similar to that. I should add I'd rather he wore his real one though!

duchy

You really are an egotistical plank aren't you.

I quite understand why your wife wouldn't mind-in her shoes I'd actively be encouraging you not to wear it on a permanent basis !

zaffi wrote: »

The bit about not caring who believed my rationale was a direct response to someone saying that "most women wouldn't" effectively insinuating that i had ulterior motives, which i don't. So i think that was as measured a response as it could be given the insinuation.


I said i didn't care if people believed the reasoning, I did care(and hence why i posed the question) to peoples views on what could and was an interesting topic. I am curious again as to why you think peoples responses would have been different had i said it was out of curiousity rather than wanting advice?

However, peoples views would not have effected what i was going to do in the situation. I knew how my wife would react to the question and she laughed at some of the more "out there" and assumptive posts. i simply used her as specific example as a means to frame the more general question.

As it is I'll probably take the ring and tape it up during the day so if we're near water there's no issue.

What has been extremely interesting but undeniably predictable is some of the hysterical responses. Ranging from those who think it'd mean their man was going to or had cheated on them to those who would see the attendance to a stag in and of itself as a form of betrayal.

And finally the psych 101 from londonsurrey was hilarious, i've mentioned this in a few posts but just can't help myself. :rotfl:

zaffi

duchy wrote: »

You really are an egotistical plank aren't you.

I quite understand why your wife wouldn't mind-in her shoes I'd actively be encouraging you not to wear it on a permanent basis !

would you care to elaborate?

i've already had to say this in this thread, which says something i'm sure, but it's lucky for everyone concerned that your not

Taadaa

zaffi wrote: »

The bit about not caring who believed my rationale was a direct response to someone saying that "most women wouldn't" effectively insinuating that i had ulterior motives, which i don't. So i think that was as measured a response as it could be given the insinuation.


I said i didn't care if people believed the reasoning, I did care(and hence why i posed the question) to peoples views on what could and was an interesting topic. I am curious again as to why you think peoples responses would have been different had i said it was out of curiousity rather than wanting advice?

However, peoples views would not have effected what i was going to do in the situation. I knew how my wife would react to the question and she laughed at some of the more "out there" and assumptive posts. i simply used her as specific example as a means to frame the more general question.

As it is I'll probably take the ring and tape it up during the day so if we're near water there's no issue.

What has been extremely interesting but undeniably predictable is some of the hysterical responses. Ranging from those who think it'd mean their man was going to or had cheated on them to those who would see the attendance to a stag in and of itself as a form of betrayal.

And finally the psych 101 from londonsurrey was hilarious, i've mentioned this in a few posts but just can't help myself. :rotfl:

I don't think the responses would have been different. I still can't understand why you weren't upfront and said 'this is the situation, but what would you do?'

Why are they hysterical? Just because you and your wife don't mind if you don't wear your wedding ring on this occasion, doesn't mean that everyone would feel that way. It means that they view the importance of the ring on a different scale to you. If you could have predicted the responses, why did you ask in the first place..?

So, care to elaborate as to why you have changed your mind now don't want to take it off so will tape it up?

I have to be honest, it does sound a lot like you have come on here to say 'I have got a really expensive wedding ring' and 'my wife trusts me implicitly, to the point where I don't have to wear a wedding ring on a stag do' then slag anyone off who would not be happy with that situation, and yes, you do give the impression of being egotistical.

zaffi

Taadaa wrote: »

I don't think the responses would have been different. I still can't understand why you weren't upfront and said 'this is the situation, but what would you do?'

Why are they hysterical? Just because you and your wife don't mind if you don't wear your wedding ring on this occasion, doesn't mean that everyone would feel that way. It means that they view the importance of the ring on a different scale to you. If you could have predicted the responses, why did you ask in the first place..?

So, care to elaborate as to why you have changed your mind now don't want to take it off so will tape it up?

I have to be honest, it does sound a lot like you have come on here to say 'I have got a really expensive wedding ring' and 'my wife trusts me implicitly, to the point where I don't have to wear a wedding ring on a stag do' then slag anyone off who would not be happy with that situation, and yes, you do give the impression of being egotistical.

Not been on in a few days, stag preparation, leaving at 0600 tomorrow :beer:

They are hysterical (as in overreaction, not comedy) as clearly a measured response to someone saying "i'm going on a stag do" is not "this is a betrayal" or that taking the ring off immediately means your now free and willing to cheat. You see it all the time on this board. Threads started mostly by women about stuff like how their partners never let their phone out of their sight. Within the first page posters will have told a clearly insecure OP that her partner is cheating on her that she should hack his email or install a data logger on his laptop.

I didn't change my mind! i initially asked a question "should i take it?" at no point did i say i wasn't going to. A poster on p1 gave good advice about taping it up, i choosing to do that.

The only indication i gave to the value of my ring was that it was "far more expensive" than my raybans which i got duty free at T5 for about £90. So my ring is more expensive than £90 look at me, i'm a big shot.

If i'm so egotistical, why is my post count so low and not in the thousands like say, you and duchy? despite me being a member for far longer than both of you. Clearly you guys love giving your opinion on anything and everything, not that there's anything wrong with that, but it's a bit egotistical wouldn't you say?

amus

I wouldnt care. My husband never wears his because he doesnt like rings on his hands.

If someone wants to remove a ring for purposes of cheating, they can easily remove a ring when out of sight and just as easily put it back on afterwards and the husband/wife would be none the wiser.

euronorris

zaffi wrote: »

Your husband said he wasn't going to wear his wedding ring on a stag do?

I've just been looking at buying a pair of cheap sunglasses to take on a stag do to benidorm next week because there is no way on earth i'm taking my raybans.

This got me thinking, my ring is far more expensive and in some respect is irreplaceable regardless of value. With all the booze and water and general hijinks that will go on, should i take it with me? and secondly how would my wife see it?

If you can manage not to lose it day to day, at work and at play, then I don't see why a stag is any different.