Vent at road rage drivers who tell you to get out your car and then drive off.....

wary

malkyh wrote: »

I didn't leave for work that morning looking for a fight. This clown thought he'd be a smart !!!!! and decide that he could just ram his car in front of mines and then decide to try to intimidate me by signalling me to pull over if I had an issue with his actions.

I realise that. Two points to make here:
1) He only indicated for you to pull over after you mouthed abuse at him
2) The fact that he bottled it and drove off is hardly something to vent about, unless you actually wanted to teach him a lesson the physical way

It’s good that you taught him a lesson and without the need for violence. However, whether your actions were impeccable and particularly wise is another matter.

malkyh

I realise that. Two points to make here:
1) He only indicated for you to pull over after you mouthed abuse at him OK, fair point.
2) The fact that he bottled it and drove off is hardly something to vent about, unless you actually wanted to teach him a lesson the physical way. I guess I was more aiming the vent at the fact that he was one of these idiots that thinks that they can intimidate you by wanting you to pull over so they can 'show you' who is boss.
It’s good that you taught him a lesson and without the need for violence. However, whether your actions were impeccable and particularly wise is another matter.

wary

Op – despite my criticisms of you, I also have a certain amount of admiration. I’m particularly non-streetwise and in many ways I wish I had the bottle to stand up for myself more, particularly when someone acts the hard c*nt towards me.

But then I remember that at least I’m not disfigured, I’ve not had my teeth knocked out, I’ve not been put inside for GBH ... and I’m still alive. You can probably say the same on all counts now, but in a year or so maybe not.

Road rage is a very real phenomenon. I’m not exactly the most aggressive and volatile of people but if someone beeps their horn at me, I feel like I want to get out of the car and beat their face to pulp! Really, it is not worth getting involved, and that includes mouthing off at people even when they deserve it. Sooner or later you’re bound to pick the wrong person.

malkyh

wary wrote: »

Op – despite my criticisms of you, I also have a certain amount of admiration. I’m particularly non-streetwise and in many ways I wish I had the bottle to stand up for myself more, particularly when someone acts the hard c*nt towards me.

But then I remember that at least I’m not disfigured, I’ve not had my teeth knocked out, I’ve not been put inside for GBH ... and I’m still alive. You can probably say the same on all counts now, but in a year or so maybe not.

Road rage is a very real phenomenon. I’m not exactly the most aggressive and volatile of people but if someone beeps their horn at me, I feel like I want to get out of the car and beat their face to pulp! Really, it is not worth getting involved, and that includes mouthing off at people even when they deserve it. Sooner or later you’re bound to pick the wrong person.

I completely see where you are coming from. I think this 'streak' in me comes from many years of being bullied at school and having people treat me like dirt.

No idea why but one day I woke up and thought 'sod it, I am going to stand up for myself now and not let these people do this to me'.

Maybe as time has gone on I now take it a bit too far, when, like this driver did, becomes the 'big man bully' I see red and that's when the memories come back and I think 'ok, lets see how 'tough' you really are when the person doesn't crumble in front of you.

I actually refused to go to any of my high school reunion parties as I was worried I would end up headbutting some of the bullies lol.

paddyrg

wary wrote: »

You make a good point. Yes we do need people to stand up to bullies. The main problem is that it is those who take this stance who often come off worse.

Many years ago, some lads from a nearby hard school came around to ours with the express intent of starting a fight, and indeed one of our lads got beaten up BIGSTYLE ... whilst the whole school stood and watched. They had actually picked on his friend initially and he stepped in to help, yet no one helped him, even his so-called friend who he’d helped in the first place. This is not the only time I’ve heard of similar incidents, whereby someone comes to the rescue but then no one will help him, not even the person he was rescuing in the first place.

Yep, totally get that it is scary and lonely to stand up for yourself and others, but imagine your schoolmates had some balls - 50 kids or whatever refusing to take it and see one of their own getting beaten for standing up against bullies - the bullies would have run away sharpish. In the scenario you describe kid A was going to get a kicking, kid B stood up for him, kid B got a kicking whilst kids C onwards just watched. If B hadn't stepped in, A was going to get badly hurt, B was badly let down by everyone else.

The only way tyrants and bullies can win is if everyone else let's them. A little bit of courage from a lot of people is worth more than the odd fictional superhero. Where would WW2 have gone if we'd just said 'ooohh they're picking on Poland, let's look the other way...oh France as well...?Maybe we should cook them some nice Bratwurst for when they arrive?'. It is easier to pretend you can't see, but is that really the message we should be sending society - if someone is nasty to you let them win? Would you want someone to step in to stop your teenage daughter from being abused? If so, you also need to find the courage/righteousness/whatever to similarly stand up for someone else's daughter in turn, and all that means. In my opinion, anyway!

zagfles

malkyh wrote: »

I completely see where you are coming from. I think this 'streak' in me comes from many years of being bullied at school and having people treat me like dirt.

No idea why but one day I woke up and thought 'sod it, I am going to stand up for myself now and not let these people do this to me'.

Maybe as time has gone on I now take it a bit too far, when, like this driver did, becomes the 'big man bully' I see red and that's when the memories come back and I think 'ok, lets see how 'tough' you really are when the person doesn't crumble in front of you.

I actually refused to go to any of my high school reunion parties as I was worried I would end up headbutting some of the bullies lol.

You should have gone, you might have found it very theraputic! I went to one when I was in my late 30's, and what a turn around it was! All the bullies and "hard" boys who turned up were now in menial low paid jobs or unemployed, and heard stories of others who hadn't turned up who were drunks or on drugs.

Most of the "nerdy" kids (like me) were in well paid jobs with attractive partners, the two girls who all the boys fancied and who all the girls aspired to were both single mothers before they were 20 and looked, frankly, haggard, whereas the geeky, shy girls had grown into confident attractive women in well paid careers.

zagfles

paddyrg wrote: »

Yep, totally get that it is scary and lonely to stand up for yourself and others, but imagine your schoolmates had some balls - 50 kids or whatever refusing to take it and see one of their own getting beaten for standing up against bullies - the bullies would have run away sharpish. In the scenario you describe kid A was going to get a kicking, kid B stood up for him, kid B got a kicking whilst kids C onwards just watched. If B hadn't stepped in, A was going to get badly hurt, B was badly let down by everyone else.

The only way tyrants and bullies can win is if everyone else let's them. A little bit of courage from a lot of people is worth more than the odd fictional superhero. Where would WW2 have gone if we'd just said 'ooohh they're picking on Poland, let's look the other way...oh France as well...?Maybe we should cook them some nice Bratwurst for when they arrive?'. It is easier to pretend you can't see, but is that really the message we should be sending society - if someone is nasty to you let them win? Would you want someone to step in to stop your teenage daughter from being abused? If so, you also need to find the courage/righteousness/whatever to similarly stand up for someone else's daughter in turn, and all that means. In my opinion, anyway!

But you need to pick your fights. Having a fist fight over 4 yards of tarmac or being delayed 20 seconds is way OTT.

On the roads I get delayed far more by the numpties who don't seem to understand how to use mini-roundabouts, or who don't understand which lane to use, than by those who force their way into queues.

In particular there's a motorway roundabout near me which is traffic light controlled but with a filter lane to go left onto the motorway which avoids the traffic lights. There are 3 lanes approaching the roundabout with the filter lane off the left lane, the other directions are straight on on the A-road and right onto the motorway. Yet you often get queues of 8-10 cars in the left lane, most of whom are going straight on, with maybe one car in the middle lane and nobody in the right lane. What kind of moron joins a 10 car queue in the left lane to go straight on when there is virtually no queue in the middle lane:mad:? If I'm going left on the motorway I have to sit behind these numpties in the left lane as they are waiting on the traffic lights.

They delay me far more than some bully forcing their way into a queue!

wary

paddyrg wrote: »

Yep, totally get that it is scary and lonely to stand up for yourself and others, but imagine your schoolmates had some balls - 50 kids or whatever refusing to take it and see one of their own getting beaten for standing up against bullies - the bullies would have run away sharpish. In the scenario you describe kid A was going to get a kicking, kid B stood up for him, kid B got a kicking whilst kids C onwards just watched. If B hadn't stepped in, A was going to get badly hurt, B was badly let down by everyone else.

He certainly was badly let down by the school, and yes, it is a shame that everyone didn't club together. At many schools they would have done just that, but ours was a comparatively "soft" school, which I guess is what the bullies gambled on.

Actually anecdotal evidence suggests that an onlooker is more likely to intervene if they're alone rather than an individual in a crowd. This might sound contradictory but it's a case of everyone hoping that someone else will be the one who does something, but no one does ... and if someone does intervene then they'll likely find that no one else will intervene to help them.

pimento

He might have been like me. In an unfamiliar town and just in the wrong lane.

I'd give someone like that the benefit of the doubt and let them in with a smile but then, I don't have a body raging with testosterone.

Equaliser123

So what exactly would you have liked him to do, OP?

Each get out of your cars and have some fisticuffs because he pushed in? Bit childish isn't it?

Crikey, pick your fights. Yes, it is incredibly annoying when drivers push in. But come on....