Strop over stag do...unreasonable?

lazer

Torry_Quine wrote: »

I don't think it's strange to have friends of the opposite gender, just to have them at a stag/hen night. A stag/hen do is supposed to be same sex. There's nothing wrong with having both men and women but in my opinion that isn't a stag/hen do.:o


I agree though that the person she needs to speak to is the boyfriend.

I'm another one that thinks a stag night is for the men, a hen night is for the women.

Personally, I'm getting married in 4 months, and despite having a number of male friends, my hen night is female only, and i'm having a seperate with the male friends - its an excuse for a lot of partying!

heartbreak_star

Nicely done for having two parties

HBS x

Sambucus_Nigra

Torry_Quine wrote: »

A stag/hen do is supposed to be same sex.

Who says? What are they going to do that the ladies mustn't see?

heartbreak_star

I guess that's the way it was traditionally, you know when after dinner the ladies cleared the dishes and had a sherry while the men retired to the drawing-room for port and cigars

HBS x

[Deleted User]

Sambucus_Nigra wrote: »

Who says? What are they going to do that the ladies mustn't see?

Go to strip clubs. Get drunk. Do stupid things. Say stupid things. Embarrass themselves.

Lifeforms

Just out of interest who got the job of doing it? Because it kind of comes across as it's your OH (the best man) who is meant to be organising it, but you've taken parts/all of it on because you can get "mates rates".

If he's meant to be organising it, and hasn't mentioned anything about you actually doing most of the organising, how would the Groom know that you feel like you should be included?

Just as you might be free range to do traditionally male and female parties, doesn't mean he is, or wants too. If you approach and say look I just pretty much arranged all this on the cheap etc, and then he says no still, get over it.

If you really are so put out, then why are you still helping to organise. Step out of it, let it play whatever way they want it to go. If you want an invite ask the Groom himself and let him know just how much you've done. If you don't want to go to the Brides one, don't.

Torry_Quine

Sambucus_Nigra wrote: »

Who says? What are they going to do that the ladies mustn't see?

I would hope they aren't doing anything that the ladies can't see. It's about men getting together to see their friend into married life and the same for women in a hen night. Nothing is written in stone and it's up to the organiser, usually the best man or bridesmaid who is invited.

heartbreak_star

As I have stated several times, the groom knows NOTHING of all this, including the fact he's actually getting a stag do!!

My OH asked if I could help out because I had a few good ideas and how to go about them, and because I love him, I helped... and I guess I just assumed it was going to be mixed gender and was taken aback to be told it might not be. I don't need to "get over" anything, I just needed to vent and get a few opinions.

If I go, I go. I probably won't even be invited to the hen night as I have very little contact with the bride (and she'll also assume I'm at the stag do, lol!).

HBS x

pelirocco

heartbreak_star wrote: »

*sigh* if you read my original post...I have been a best man, organised a successful stag do (with people of both gender in attendance), and have attended both stag and hen dos in the past, hence my surprise at the outcome of this.

Seems like people aren't as open-minded as I thought - and if you check my opinions on feminism which are plastered all over the boards I'm pretty equalitarian. Incidentally, the groom knows nothing about all this - the best man is organising it (who happens to my OH). I also fear that if I am actually invited to the hen night I won't know anybody and it'll just be sitting around watching chick flicks and !!!!!ing.

Hope that's clarified things a bit.

HBS x

Actually it seems as tho dont like other posters opinions if they dont agree with you lol

The groom doesnt want you there , get over it

[Deleted User]

Technically - the groom doesn't give a fig if she comes or not. It's her OH who thinks some people may be offended - and he should 'manage the expectations' of those going so they know it's mixed

Really - he should talk to the groom to find out what he wants