Am I over reacting?

fedupnow

jackie_w wrote: »

He is aware that we will need to work hard to get this money to pay for the holiday.

Someone said that his gran might not have put it like that but TBH that is the kind of thing she would say, I love my MIL to bits, but when it comes to my DS he can wind her round his finger.

Mm. Sounds like he knows that. Kids are good at that, aren't they?

We did it, they do it and their kids will do it. It's their job.
EDIT: Perhaps you should let him know you know. But keep it light. Winding old ladies around his finger is a skill. He is merely practising it for the future.

faerie~spangles

Simples:

I explained he would need to save up his pocket money and any money he got for birthdays christmas etc. He was fine with that.

If he doesn't have the money he doesn't go on the trip.

You are his parent and what you say is final.

mildred1978

A school trip to AUSTRALIA????

!!!!!!??

It is indeed a trip of a lifetime, and one completely wasted on a 16 year old I would have thought. I'm 36 and I haven't been there yet. Might take hubby for his 40th birthday.

As a parent there is no way I'd be funding that (and we aren't hard up). Why can't he wait until he's finished his education, got a job and save for a trip to Oz himself when he'll be old enough to appreciate it?!

Dunroamin

Person_one wrote: »

I'm good friends with a few teachers, they consider the travel a perk.

I did it twice a year for nearly 10 years. It made a nice change to the routine but it was very hard work, particularly before and afterwards. The responsibility was enormous as I was often the only member of staff present.

ETA

FE college students, not school.

GobbledyGook

Person_one wrote: »

Probably depends on the school too.

Completely.

Also will depend on the parents. If you've got parents who are realistic and know that kids will be kids and aren't going to go ballistic if their angel has an accident while doing something they shouldn't be (which lets be honest a bunch of 16 year olds are bound to try something at some point) and comes home with a broken bone or something then it's a whole different kettle of fish to a school where the parents are up ranting about "that f-ing teacher" and threatening to sue at all minutes. If your parents are supportive and accept that staff can only do so much then it makes things enjoyable, but still hard work.

It's a shame. I know one class who are getting no day trips this year because of the problems caused by parents after the last one. The teacher just won't take them, and I can't say I blame her.

I'm finishing up working in schools at the end of this school year and I cannot wait. No amount of holidays makes up for the increasing amount of grief (from some parents) or lack of interest in their child's progress (from some parents). I've had enough.

*max*

It always makes me a little sad when I read about those "once in a lifetime" trips...What, once you've been on one, that's it? For the rest of your life, you're going to have weekends in Butlins? However nice Butlins might be, seriously, if had I heard aged 16 that going to Australia was a "once in a lifetime" thing, I'd have wanted to top myself.

Travelling is possible on any budget, just because the school dictates an extravagant one (and £1500 is extravagant!) doesn't mean that you have to blindly give it away. I would ask the school exaclty what is included in that price. And I would go over it with a toothcomb.

If you can afford to subsidise your kid to go on that trip, then asking him to contribute is only fair. As others have said, maybe a percentage of all earnings would be appropriate, say 75%?

Lucky kid!

FBaby

mildred1978 wrote: »

A school trip to AUSTRALIA????

!!!!!!??

It is indeed a trip of a lifetime, and one completely wasted on a 16 year old I would have thought. I'm 36 and I haven't been there yet. Might take hubby for his 40th birthday.

As a parent there is no way I'd be funding that (and we aren't hard up). Why can't he wait until he's finished his education, got a job and save for a trip to Oz himself when he'll be old enough to appreciate it?!

I agree 100000% with this. My partner and I earn vey good money, but this is the type of dream holiday we plan for when the kids will off to uni at best, when we retire otherwise.

I would never agree to my DD going on such a trip, because for that amount of money, I would much prefer to fund a family trip. She will have all the time to arrange fantastic holidays with her friends when she is older (and works to pay for them), until then and rely on me to pay for it, it will be family holidays, memories of experiences that were shared with the people who should mean the most to her.

I would really really hope that my DD best friend's parents would see it the same (thankfully I think they would). I would much prefer to offer to take her on own of our nice holidays.

I am aghast that any school, unless private with extortionate fees, could even suggest such a trip, putting inevitable pressure on parents, either to lose out on a family special occasion or by coming accross as mean parents. £1,500.... what the heck, who can afford this without massive serious sacrifices that should be for a very exptional family experience, not a stupid school trip with kids and teachers they will most likely forget all about in a few years time.

lilymay1

Going to Australia on a school trip isn't anything out of the ordinary these days. My old High School had trips to India, NZ, South Africa (we were twinned with a school there), Russia, North America and even Argentina along with all the usual ones to Europe.

I went to a fairly good state school in a reasonably affluent area. Those trips provided an opportunity for children to travel to places they may not be able to go to again in a safe environment with their friends.

A lot of you seem to be forgetting that not everyone has family holidays - I never did. The memories and experiences gained on the various school trips I went on are still with me today. Fbaby - you're comments sound quite ignorant.

And OP. I'm quite suprised that at 16, you're still paying for his trips to the cinema? And McDonalds? Really? Why doesn't he have a job?

cottonhead

Gone are the days of a £20 camping trip ! Some of the school trips I hear about these days are amazing - and expensive!
The main reason I replied is because of what your mum in law said. I know my own gran would have said exactly the same - with a glint in her eye and a cheaky smile and she would then probably given me some money towards the trip. I know she wouldnt have gone behind my parents back - it would have been a light hearted kind of rebelion. Grans are there to treat and spoil kids and parents are there for the serious things so I wouldnt let it bother you. I doubt she meant to undermine you.
If it were me I would pay for the trip but explain to your son he has to find the spending money and as for gran I wouldnt mention it.

VJsmum

Our school runs trips to china (£1500 + visa), New York (£1000) and a skiing trip every year (up to £1000). DS has been on one skiing trip (which was less than that) which we funded. However we have told him that next year if he wants to go, he will have to contribute as it is such an expensive trip.

Skiing is the one thing we are unlikely to do as a family so i am happy for him to do it but, I agree, he should have a target amount that he will have to contribute.

BTW - do you have other children? And will they get a similar trip? That has always been on my mind - that what is available for one should be available for the other.