Determined this is my last debt diary

clearmydebts

starnac wrote: »

My opinion (for what it's worth)

Is the lure of a smaller mortgage worth OH being unhappy?

Would the uplifting feeling of being by the sea wear off so would be worth living a small distance away and then being able to "run away" to the sea whenever you feel like it?

Which is best for the kids, schools wise and socially? Will you be running them around in the car all the time to get to clubs, friends houses etc?

These are just some things to think about. I'm not actually asking for answers.

DH and I used to live in Manchester and when we moved here (very small village - one road in, then you have to turn around at the end of the village to get back out :rotfl:) I really worried about how DH would cope with the major change. He has settled in lovely and loves it here. He loves the sense of community and acknowledges how much better it is for the kids than where we used to live. So OH might surprise you and change his mind. However you need to do what is best for you guys. It worked for us but that doesn't mean it's right for everyone.

Good luck x

Thanks Star,

I think I just had a bit of a wobble. I am grand now. I know that location makes a huge difference and I have told OH if I mention it again he has to tell me that!

Had a lovely bank holiday weekend with OH, kids and extended family. The kids are at a lovely age now, really cute and funny

Moneywise - trying not to spend much but easier said than done. Should break the 13k barrier next month. Also my childcare will go down next month as my mother and auntie are going to mind the kids. It will go back up in Sept as I will be paying for pre-school for both of them, Max for 5 days and Evie for 2.

clearmydebts

Oh dear, haven't been on here for ages. Life has taken over...........

Update on the flat - we got offered just 1.5k under the valuation but have taken it off the market for a few weeks as estate agents were rubbish and where we are selling is buoyant at the moment. Plus we had started to do it up, got it all re-painted etc and all she was willing to offer was an extra £650 when we had spent £2k. Could be a bit of a gamble but it didn't feel right to sell under the value (which was valued pre-decoration) in a buoyant market. Time will tell....

I am doing rubbish with the BOI credit card, really bad, and the savings all went on redecorating the flat so we really are back to square one. I am hoping it will all pay off in the end.

starnac

If the market is buoyant then I think it's a good decision. Change EA and try again once you've re decorated.

The extra expense will be worth it once you've sold the flat x

clearmydebts

starnac wrote: »

If the market is buoyant then I think it's a good decision. Change EA and try again once you've re decorated.

The extra expense will be worth it once you've sold the flat x

Thanks Star. The new estate agent is taking photos tomorrow. The flat looks about 100 times better so fingers crossed it will shift quickly!

clearmydebts

Whoop whoop. I am under 13k. Just

I feel like I can't really move forward until this flat is sold so feel like I am in limbo. We have had a lot of expenses the last few months but it feels like that will coming to an end now and I can start to make inroads. Proper inroads.

So watch this space. I'm on a mission!

Lara44

Keep on keeping on CMD! Hope you get the flat sold quickly for mega bucks

starnac

Ooh it'll be sold quickly this time I'm sure.

castlelough

Best of luck with the flat sale CMD. I think you were right to decline the offer and switch EA. Property seems to be on the rise in Ireland and hopefully you will sell before the end of the summer! Then it's onwards and upwards for you!

clearmydebts

Thanks for all the lovely encouraging posts. The flat went back on again last Thursday and it has had 3 viewings so far and 1 offer. The offer was £2,000 under the asking price but as a first offer it's not bad. I feel like it was definitely the correct decision to make.

Well - remember I had a wobble about where to live. I had one again. This time I wrote it in a letter to OH because I can't bring it up without him losing the plot basically.

Well - he went into a sulk. I am much clearer about things this time. I am not taking on a mortgage of €300,000 just to live in an area that we 'like'. It's ridiculous. We would just get a bog standard house and would have barely any money to do it up or overpay the mortgage. We could be stuck with high payments until we are 65.

In contrast, we could get a beautiful house in an estate with loads of kids for our kids to play with. I would have a great network of support and the mortgage would be really small. If we put our heads down we could be mortgage free in 5-7 years.

I told OH that I am putting the kids financial future and happiness first, plus the need for them to have other kids to play with and me to have good support. He says I am being selfish.

But he keeps looking at townhouse type places that cost the earth and there would be no other kids for mine to play with.

I even said to him that in a few years we could start saving to buy a home in the other place and we could move there when the kids are a bit older. That's not good enough either.

I think OH is a bit of a spoilt brat. He is looking at where is 'perceived' to be nice to live, a fancy house and fancy cafes and restaurants. The kids and schools, friends etc don't feature in his priorities at all, or if they do, they are low down.

starnac

The news on the flat sounds promising.

Oh dear about your OH going into a sulk. I also write things in a letter to my hubby. Sometimes it's better as you can get past the "explosion" stage and can get to the "let's talk about it rationally" stage a lot quicker.

I'm sorry your OH isn't willing to listen to your side of things. I personally have never wanted to live on an estate but there is a lovely one right by our church and seeing the kids all out playing in the street together and most of the neighbours looking out for each other, I can definitely see the appeal. If it was a choice between that and a townhouse where the kids can't play outside then I would chose the best for my kids ever time. Give him a bit of time to calm down. Maybe once he's had time to think about it (and get over his selfishness ) then he'll see the benefits of living there x