Asking about getting a dog resulting in eviction

GotToChange

Clearlier - thank you.
The username is very old and does predate this situation - but it could be applied to many aspects of my life (some of which actually
CannotPossibly BeChanged). I didn't expect to be here one year, let alone 12 (that old divorce thing....) *sigh*

I will try to do as you suggest but it feels like wishful thinking. Even with all the wonderful and sensible advice on this thread - for which I am so very grateful - I cannot find a spark of positivity.

GotToChange

Sambucus_Nigra wrote: »

Well, it would be a good way of getting kicked out - wouldn't it!

Yep.

But earlier in the thread, I was told that kicking me out might not be quite so simple as the LLs believe, which is why I asked the "hmm, what if?" question.

G_M

Sambucus_Nigra wrote: »

If I choose to mention/reiterate/comment on this point, it's got now't to do with you.

And if I choose to point out you are mentioning/reiterating/commenting on a point already covered.....

GotToChange

Please GM and SN;
play nicely.

I appreciate all the input and interest and need the support so (even though guilty myself) sticking to the topic (loose as it is) would be marvellous.
(I don't mind being told stuff twice, if the intention is good rather than a smackdown.)

Sambucus_Nigra

GotToChange wrote: »

Please GM and SN;
play nicely.

I appreciate all the input and interest and need the support so (even though guilty myself) sticking to the topic (loose as it is) would be marvellous.
(I don't mind being told stuff twice, if the intention is good rather than a smackdown.)

Why GM can't let other people post without stomping on them is his/her issue...I have other stuff to do that doesn't involve self appointed moderators telling me what I can and can't post.

Big fish > little pond and all that.

Good luck - looks like you are going to need it.

GotToChange

Sambucus_Nigra wrote: »

Why GM can't let other people post without stomping on them is his/her issue...I have other stuff to do that doesn't involve self appointed moderators telling me what I can and can't post.

Big fish > little pond and all that.

Good luck - looks like you are going to need it.

Oh.

I see.

(I think.)

blossomhill_2

Hi OP - you seem to be in a difficult situation, for which you have my sympathies, as it is one thing to know your rights but another to stand up to bullies about them

The main thing that stirkes me is ... two against one = harassment

You should have one point of contact and only have to deal with one of them about your tenancy, this would eliminate Mrs LL having the vapours and playing the emontional strain card

I was bullied at work for a very short while by a husband and wife tag team and as soon as I realised this and told them I would only deal with one of them, they lost their power - turned out they had a history of doing this and had always backed each other up - as soon as I divided them, I won. If he says "my wife will go mad about this" think "your problem, you married her, I didn't"

GotToChange

Duplicated -
again

GotToChange

Oh - agreed x 1000.

I am not sure when the royal "We" started; he began to refer to himself in the plural some time ago and it made it difficult even then - especially as prior to that, if I would call with some question, she would always say (understandably) that B. deals with "all that". But now, he will always refer to "we"; in notes "we would appreciate", calls "we'll get back to you" blah blah.

Thus, I have always felt outnumbered; he seems to revel in it. A few years ago (2006 maybe...), I went across to a neighbour's Boxing Day supper. As I stood alongside my LL at the buffet table, he said - it must be dreadful to be on your own at Christmas - not the first time he had rubbed my solo status in my face. As I had been on the receiving end of a few sideways looks as I arrived, I didn't actually have the courage to stay, so made my excuses and left. I have never been invited to a neighbourhood event (small cul-de-sac) since then. And I was a lot braver (and everything else) then than I am now.
(poor me....)

I thought (stupidly) that the fact that my first talk about the dog was with Mrs LL was a good thing - and certainly seemed as she asked interested (verging on intrusive) questions. But she did say that she would have to dicuss it with him and he may be "awkward". Damn right.

They then left me hanging for a day (when I saw him washing his car a few hours after I had called, I got "We're getting back to you") - only to even then not call me but wait for me to call them when I had heard nothing. And of course, the end result was the "We need to come round and talk to you as I (him) am unhappy and M (her) is VERY unhappy."
Hopeless.

I cannot see how I can separate him out from this; he even actually has her write any notes that they send to me but it is evident that they are his words (or so I thought).

Her involvement ramped the emotional side of things up by several levels, in no small part because I thought that she (being female) may have some kind of understanding that would counteract the hostility from her other half. As it turned out, she was nastier and crueller by virtue of the fact that she is a woman (and still wanted to question me about the dog, leaving me with my hopes raised and dashed yet again).

irishjohn

Hi Gottochange
Terrible situation - but you can get through!

Sent you a PM