Daughters pregnant !

Penny-Pincher!!

I don't think think the OP is going ballistic, just being realistic with neither of them working and her being in Uni etc.

SunnyCyprus

Hi OP, just to add my two pennies, can i ask you just to give your daughter a big hug, even if you don't usually, (my family don't really hug, so i 'over-compensate with my kiddies!).
You dont need to say anything to her at all, a hug will do.
I was 19, pregnant by my fiance, and i was forced into a decision i wasnt happy with, told mum i was pregnant, and there was no discussion, just 'we'll get you down the doctors'. Also was told that if i had 'it' i would be without any family or support.....
It took me a good 8 or 9 years to get over it, even though i had my babies a couple of years later when we were married. i also went through terrible PND when i did have my babies, the first thought in my head when i held my newborn daughter was about what i had done to the other baby...

anyway, just please be there for your daughter, whatever she decides. xxx

vickynleon

just wanted to add my bit, i got pregnant at 19, it isnt the end of her life, at the time i was in college and working part time, my partner was only working part time but then went on to get a full time job working 5 days a week which then rose to 6 days a week, i went back to work when my son was around 9 months and when he was 11 months we bought a house, no help we done it all on our own, we are now living comfortably with our gorgeous 4 year old son and have our second son due in august so please don't think that having a child at that age is the end of it, my parents werent happy to start with because we were living with them but they cant go a day without seeing my son now because they love him so much.
right now all she needs is your support and she will make the decision thats right for her and hopefully everything will go smoothly and she will soon grow up and you will be suprised. good luck and hope all goes well for you all.

marywooyeah

taxi36 wrote: »

OP ,search on here for a thread called "teenage unplaned pregnancy".

Thats a thread I posted approx 1 year ago when my Daughter was in a similar situation. It will give you some insight into the journey we had....

Maybe some one can link the thread for the OP as I am unsure how to do it.

Good luck

OP your daughter has made her mind up so please don't alienate her when she needs you most, it must seem like a negative thing at first but in 7 months you'll be rubbing your hands counting down the days til the baby arrives excited to be a grandparent!

taxi36 I always wondered how that turned out.....happily I hope

kymrob you are amazing, that sounds like a horrible thing to go through but you sound so brave and I really admire your determination and selflessness, it's your parent's loss for the way they treated you. you sound like an amazing mother

sunnycypress unfortunately I can totally empathise, I've never "gotten over" it either and know what you mean about guilt when having another one, sorry you had to go through that

kymrob

marywooyeah, thank u
i have had some lovely comments brought tears to my eyes.

i found that when my daughter was 16 the hardest to look at her (who looks so much like me) at that age to think what i went through so young how i was treated and looked down on so hard, i often wonder how my parents could not just smoother me with love at that time unreal.
me my daughter have cuddles most days we r soooo close its lovely she make my proud everyday to have her go 8 months and not tell me she was pregnant i would feel awful she couldnt tell me.

all i got was "well everyone now know what u been upto we better go tell neighbours"
to this day she (my mother)feel that she was hard done by and all she went through ie. embrassing her, not me the 16 year old girl all i went through months laying in bed every night worrying what will happen to me.

i was told by docs i was 36 weeks pregnant !
i said "ok!"
doc said,"do u know how many weeks women r pregnant for?"
i said "no"
he said "u have 4 weeks left"
oooppps!! i didnt have a clue, funny when i look bk how young. thanks god she was healthy!

taxi36

marywooyeah wrote: »

!

taxi36 I always wondered how that turned out.....happily I hope

Hi Marywooyeah.

I remember you from my original post about my Daughter.

As an update as I know that many people took time to help and advise me on my thread:

I AM A GRANDAD + I LOVE IT :j:j:j:j:j.

My Grandson is now 4.5 months old. Both he and my Daughter are still living at home with us + I can honestly say that I am smitten with him!

Life is good although with 3 adults and 2 teenagers + 1 baby in a 3 bed house it can be some what hectic at times I just wouldnt have it any other way.

My Daughter has taken to being a Mum fantastically and I am so very proud of her.

The little man is a happy content baby although is having some trouble with reflux at the minute , we dont dwell on this too much as we are aware that on the grand scale of things this is not TOO serious and is something (we hope) he will out grow as he gets older.

When I think back to how I felt in the early days regarding the pregnancy and the worry we sufferred I reaslise that the baby has changed all our lives for the better.

My Daughter is still in a relationship with the babies father but to be honest he (in our opinion) could be more involved. He sees his son on 3 days of the week when my Daughter takes him to visit. Financially he has not contributed ONE SINGLE PENNY towards the upkeep of the child.....

However , the child wants for nothing.

OP , I hope you have read my original thread which another poster kindly linked for you , it may give you some insight.

I wish you all the best.

marywooyeah

kymrob it's true you really put yourself on the line before she was even born, such an inspiration

taxi36 I'm so so so glad to hear of your family's happiness at your grandchild, I know your daughter's boyfriend and his family really pressurised her and I'm so glad you were able to support her, what a great parent she must be with a dad like you to look out for her. something tells me that little chappy is a grandad's boy!

notice the OP has not been back, hope everything is ok with them and their daughter.