Homelessness at 34 weeks pregnant?

duchy

It's fairly simple -some visit MSE for genuine help/advice/tips.......others because they feel so morally and financial superior yet socialyl inept so post here to try and get self validation.

This thread started with fairly brisk but contructive advice and rapidly degenerated into Mrs Buckets taking potshots-not sure how useful those later posts were to the OP

Swans1912

Person_one wrote: »

Well, I knew that already, so I'm not going to be a baby about it.

not a baby, no, you're just a hypocrite.

fredandwilma

duchy wrote: »

others because they feel so morally and financial superior yet socialyl inept so post here to try and get self validation.

I'm in total agreement with that statement


Shame it's at other people's expense.

Dunroamin

Person_one wrote: »

Did you miss a big chunk of the thread with real statistics about contraception failure, including with sterilisation?

There's not much in the world that works 100% of the time, why would contraception be a miraculous exception?

Post 147 onwards, for a bit.

I'm well aware of the statistics on contraception and understand them also, which is more than many people do (not aiming that at you)! I also know that, if you believed everything that MSE posters said, they must be the unluckiest group of women when it comes to contraception failure,;)

We do young people an enormous disservice when we keep over emphasising the unreliability of contraception, because why should they bother with the hassle if they don't expect it to work?

I'm part of the generation who were the first to take the pill and we knew that, if we took it scrupulously, we wouldn't get pregnant and could free ourselves sexually. If we'd thought that we were still playing Russian roulette with pregnancy, would we have gone though all the hassle of 3/6 monthly FPA visits, regular internal examinations etc? I don't know.

I appreciate that, because of the HIV risk, people often need to use a condom as well but most of the methods available are exceptionally reliable if used religiously, something that many young people won't do if they think they're just improving their odds, rather than making themselves secure.

Apologies for the essay, I feel strongly about this.

daska

duchy wrote: »

Would the tattooing apply to women too or would they be let off because they are incapable of making such decisions without an evil man to influence them ?

Maybe a spot of tarring and feathering too for good measure

Tarring and feathering would be too good for the lazy scum, let them be forced to scarify themselves with sticks of blackthorn and be dunked in the local duck pond for good measure. A spell in the stocks should help them keep it in their trousers if they're too poor to have sex.

Actually my post was because I was just plain fed up with the suggestions that women ought to choose termination or to carry and give birth to babies and then voluntarily give them up for adoption - given the complete absence of any posts targeting the equally !!!!less fathers or suggesting any way in which they might be forced to take proper responsibility rather than allowing all the blame to fall on the women.

We used to have homes for unmarried mothers and force them to give up their !!!!!!! children and do laundry to pay for their mistakes. I don't believe it's a feature of the past that we should aspire to return to - the good old days weren't actually always that good.

Accidents happen. People are not perfect. We all make mistakes and bad decisions

... or perhaps is there someone here who is genuinely perfect and qualified to cast that first stone?

Any takers for that position?

FatVonD

Tina20 wrote: »

Dear me, this place is full of judgemental self righteous people!

My Dad and his last wife applied for a council property about 30 years ago, I don't know exactly the circumstances. Since then, over the 30 years, he's grown a successful business remarried and my mum has her own small part time business too. Their area has mostly been bought by the tenants of former council houses, but they continue to rent, enjoying the benefits of having 'landlords'. Eventually they might buy it, they might not.

They are not scum, they are hard working tax paying citizens. I absolutely DESPISE the assumption that council properties are for lazy single mothers, who have a baby for a free house. Or that the tenants are somehow less human, moral or reasonable. THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH BEING A COUNCIL TENANT, it doesn't make you a bad person.
It's no-ones business to judge other peoples life decisions based on being a council tenant!

Things have changed in the last 30 years, it's quite likely were they in the same situation now they wouldn't be eligible for a council house.

FatVonD

Dunroamin wrote: »

I'm well aware of the statistics on contraception and understand them also, which is more than many people do (not aiming that at you)! I also know that, if you believed everything that MSE posters said, they must be the unluckiest group of women when it comes to contraception failure,;)

Second only to teenagers on council estates, there must be something in the water that degrades the latex in condoms. (and before anyone jumps on me I grew up on a council estate )

Dunroamin wrote: »

We do young people an enormous disservice when we keep over emphasising the unreliability of contraception, because why should they bother with the hassle if they don't expect it to work?

I don't think it's so much that they aren't expecting it to work as that it's a convenient excuse when the other option is saying 'I was stupid'. If the odds are 1 in 1,000 the OP is 999 times more likely to have got pregnant because she didn't use contraception than that it failed (not that she's even said her pregnancy was due to contraception failure) yet there'll always be someone to argue the fallibility clause for her.

daska

FatVonD wrote: »

Second only to teenagers on council estates, there must be something in the water that degrades the latex in condoms. (and before anyone jumps on me I grew up on a council estate )



I don't think it's so much that they aren't expecting it to work as that it's a convenient excuse when the other option is saying 'I was stupid'. If the odds are 1 in 1,000 the OP is 999 times more likely to have got pregnant because she didn't use contraception than that it failed (not that she's even said her pregnancy was due to contraception failure) yet there'll always be someone to argue the fallibility clause for her.

Yes, there will, because contraception is fallible. Personally I know people who have fallen pregnant: while on the pill - being hospitalised for food poisoning was probably the cause of that one, with a coil in place - her husband didn't know she had one because he didn't believe in contraception (but she didn't want a seventh child), using a condom - it split, after a vasectomy, and because their partner decided to rape them. All the above events are true and happened to people I know well. All of the people involved were/are intelligent, sensible, well-educated, financially solvent (though obviously morally bankrupt in the last instance) and one of those stories is mine. (NB - none of them lived on council estates when they fell pregnant LOL.)

daska

Saw the following and thought of this thread

Teenage plus: The new adolescence
Remarkable new research suggests that conventional assumptions about how we mature are wrong – and that young people do not become true adults until they are 24

(I haven't read it yet)

Dunroamin

daska wrote: »

Yes, there will, because contraception is fallible. Personally I know people who have fallen pregnant: while on the pill - being hospitalised for food poisoning was probably the cause of that one, with a coil in place - her husband didn't know she had one because he didn't believe in contraception (but she didn't want a seventh child), using a condom - it split, after a vasectomy, and because their partner decided to rape them. All the above events are true and happened to people I know well. All of the people involved were/are intelligent, sensible, well-educated, financially solvent (though obviously morally bankrupt in the last instance) and one of those stories is mine. (NB - none of them lived on council estates when they fell pregnant LOL.)

Well, obviously, you need to take additional precautions/abstain if you're on the pill and have food poisoning or if a condom splits! IT DOESN'T SPEAK WELL FOR YOUR FRIENDS' COMMON SENSE MUCH LESS THE ATTRIBUTES YOU QUOTE0 if they didn't know that! (Oops!)