managing dress expectations

Burlesque_Babe

Don't know where you are in the UK but I got my dress on Sunday from Kudos in Edinburgh. They are doing 1 dress per day for £100 during April and have them listed on their website. I found the dress I have been swooning over for months by sheer fluke on the list in the right colour and size! If by any kind of coincidence there is a similar (or the same!) dress coming up this month, they will sell over the phone as long as nobody else has been in earlier in the day and bought it.

I wanted it soooooo much (my only Bridezilla moment in an otherwise low key wedding arrangement so far!), I had a friend waiting outside the shop before it opened and I was ready to pounce at 10am as they turned the phones on - well worth a planned attack from all sides though!! :rotfl:

You just never know where the dress of your dreams is waiting to find you

mummybearx

I don't know if you can 'convince' her to buy a cheaper dress tbh. But as it was her first time being out in the shops trying on dresses, I would go easy. Nobody want's to be told that they can't have the 'perfect' dress due to cost

For me and my DH, we married in 2010. I had saw a dress I liked, Maggie Sottero Suzanne. It was perfect! Went to a few different shops to try on other dresses, see what else was out there, but I kept thinking of 'Suzanne', I knew she was the dress for me. And I was never one of those brides, all about me and my dress :rotfl:

But the dress was £1400, before any alterations. Realistically a good 20%+ of my total budget. But.......

Anyway, I booked an appointment at a shop that sold Maggie Sottero dresses. Asked the woman if she has the Suzanne, no, they didn't stock that one She asked me to describe it, and when I did she said Hold on...... Came back 2 mins later with an almost IDENTICAL dress by a different dress designer! AND it was in the sale for £299! It was an ex-display dress, so it was a bit 'off colour' and had a few pulled threads, but the shop agreed to clean it and fix all damaged bits for the £299 :T


So, sorry for how long this post turned out, but my point is that you can get what you want, at the price you want, if you are prepared to compromise just a little bit. You could try and talk about the budget, about all the things she wants compared to things that are a necessity (ie church fees/registry office fees)

When she looks at it in black and white, maybe she will realise herself that she cannot afford the dress, at least, can't afford it brand new. But don't tell her that she can't afford it, even though I wanted to do a budget wedding, I didn't want people telling me to cut back on anything, I made those decisions myself x

gadgeteer_2

The problem now is that your DD has now fallen in love with an expensive dress.

Now you are going to suggest she be realistic and cannot afford this so should look at cheaper alternatives.

All this will do is make her want the original dress even more and every 'affordable' dress she now tries on will be compared with the original and seem cheap in comparison.

And in the true 'forbidden fruit tastes the sweetest' mentality, she'll just want the dress even more.

Mrs_Arcanum

Blimey - We did our whole wedding for less than half that amount.

sunshine2223

I fell in love with a £1300 dress a few months back. I spent hours trying to find it cheaper online and getting really stressed as I just couldn't see myself being able to afford it. I spoke to my other half about it and he was lovely and said that if I wanted that dress then we would make it happen some how.

I decided to keep trying dresses on though which opened my mind up to different styles and in the end, completely by chance, I bought a beautiful vintage 1930's dress for £120! I know that I wouldn't have thought twice about it if I hadn't tried on a similar dress a few weeks before though.

So I would definitely encourage shopping around a bit more as she might find another dress that she likes even more that's also in budget!

sugarwalsh

If I were you I would look into second hand dresses. You can even find dresses which have never been worn. ex samples etc. Ask a dress maker how much it would cost to have one made too?

Put the names of the dresses on here - someone will find it for you!

Megan

sugarwalsh

Oh, and if my Mum tried to persuade me into having a cheaper dress I would dig my heels in. Even at 34.

k_bagpuss

I got married in 2010 and my budget was £6K as well (but it was a very small wedding! 28 guests - no night do as we got married in the city centre and used the hotel bar and a bar we knew next door. The bill for my dress, 2 flowergirl dresses, bridesmaid dress, and my headdress was £1,600 which I haggled over as my dress alone should have been £1,400 and I got her down to £950.
Have you had a look on the Preloved websites? Also go to dress shops out of town as their overheads are less so their mark up isn't quite as much as city centre properties.
I never intended to spend that much on a dress to be honest, but I totally fell in love with my dress and I felt like a million dollars wearing it. If I had to do it all again I would not have chosen a different dress

hamsterfan1

I've looked at both ebay & preloved for them both, I suspect they are new designs as I cannot find them on either. Budget has already been pared to the bone as borrowing tiara & jewellery, making own invitations & calling in a favour for photography. She's not getting married until next april so may find them coming up before september (when I think we will need to order a new dress)

this is one
http://www.berketexbride.com/wedding-dresses/beth

but cannot find the other (my daughter has the name of the other one)

bubbles0169

what size do you need?
theres one on gumtree
http://www.gumtree.com/p/for-sale/gorgeous-wedding-dress-tom-flowers--beth/98743915