When I asked for luck I didn't mean the bad variety!!!

please-let-me-be-lucky

Thanks Steph! Good luck with your gold too.

It seems daft that spending time together over coffee meant so much when we are nearly always together, but the reality is we are always doing something other than enjoying each other's company, like seeing to the kids or housework etc. One of my friends posted something on facebook the other day which said 'enjoy the little things in life as when you look back you will realise they were the things that mattered'. (Or was it on the tv? I can't remember now!). Anyway, I think today was one of those occasions.

please-let-me-be-lucky

Just did this month's figures and we are in the £10k's :j:j:j

StressedSteph

please-let-me-be-lucky wrote: »

Just did this month's figures and we are in the £10k's :j:j:j

:T:T:TYay well done xx

grannyx2

What a day of good news you have had - a yey all round to the benefits news, the money for gold, the debt reduction and the quality time together.

OH and I spend every evening and weekend together in the house on our own. However I find when I want to talk to him about something its always best done over a cup of coffee and a cake. He seems to react better to the informal surroundings, it also means he has to listen as he hates a fuss in public and has no tv or paper to hide behind. Coffee and cake has been our "us" time for about 5/6 years now.

Glad you have had a good day and hope you are feeling as well as you sound

Granny x

please-let-me-be-lucky

Thank you Steph and Granny!

I'm feeling better today thanks Granny. Cough still very fierce and I overheated a bit in the shopping centre, but overall I'm doing good.
Had a bit of green eyed monster about me when I saw pregnant women or new babies while shopping, which took me by surprise. Trying not to dwell on it though.

Totally get the 'neutral territory' thing Granny Xx

uptheleft

grannyx2 wrote: »

OH and I spend every evening and weekend together in the house on our own. However I find when I want to talk to him about something its always best done over a cup of coffee and a cake. He seems to react better to the informal surroundings, it also means he has to listen as he hates a fuss in public and has no tv or paper to hide behind. Coffee and cake has been our "us" time for about 5/6 years now.

Granny x

I love this idea, I always seem to pick the wrong moment to speak to the OH about something important!

mummytogirls

Morning PLMBL,

Hope your claim for carers allowance is successful, I definitely think you should be awarded it . Im sure you will keep us informed.

Im glad you and DH enjoyed your day together, sometimes its just the simple things isnt it!! xx

*Robin*

'Morning Be Lucky, :hello:

please-let-me-be-lucky wrote: »

ESA people rang first thing this morning to say that if I was in receipt of Carers Allowance, they'd reduce DH's benefit by the amount of the allowance, however he would then be awarded a Carers Premium of £32.60 per week so we would be better off by that amount. Furthermore, if I wasn't working, they wouldn't deduct the carers allowance as I'd have that in place of my wages, so we could be receiving the same money without me going to work. I have to apply online and will do that tonight. Sounds positive so far!

..Sounds very positive. What would be their attitude to you earning a little pin money by making handmade cards or selling stuff on Eb@y [for example] - would that have to be declared, or only over a certain limit?
An alternative that might be worth looking at, is going self-employed [making cards/Eb@y selling or another home-based business] and claiming tax credits - or would that simply result in the reduction of other benefits to match so you'd be no better off in the short term?
Am no expert on benefits; just wondering?

Good news on selling your rings; don't spend the windfall all at once now, will you..

please-let-me-be-lucky wrote: »

I'm feeling better today thanks Granny. Cough still very fierce and I overheated a bit in the shopping centre, but overall I'm doing good.

MSE cough-mixture recipe: chop an onion, put in a bowl, add honey or sugar, cover with clingfilm, then in the fridge overnight. Next morning pour off the liquid and take as as required - I've found this to be at least as effective as any bought mixture, and you can take a swig every time you start to cough. It can also be made up with garlic added to the onion - which I think is more effective - but may not be acceptable to the family unless you already cook daily with garlic, lol.

please-let-me-be-lucky wrote: »

Had a bit of green eyed monster about me when I saw pregnant women or new babies while shopping, which took me by surprise. Trying not to dwell on it though.

It is natural to mourn the happy, healthy baby you wanted.
But remember the reality, and consider whether you are not already spending more than enough time at your local hospital, stressed because something else has gone wrong with one of your family members.. It's enough to cope with, isn't it?
..At the moment you're doing really well, but how would you feel if you had a baby stuck in hospital for weeks or months, and then with life-long physical and/or developmental problems? Could you cope with spending hours every day by an incubator in the NICU only able to hold baby's hand as you watch him/her struggle to survive, and support DH as he recovers, and give your DSs the childhood they deserve?

You are young, you have time. Maybe your happy, healthy third child is twinkling in DH's eye even now - but there's no hurry for him/her to land on the earth - you can give yourselves as long as you need to prepare, then choose the time when you're ready.

StressedSteph

*Robin* wrote: »

' It is natural to mourn the happy, healthy baby you wanted.
But remember the reality, and consider whether you are not already spending more than enough time at your local hospital, stressed because something else has gone wrong with one of your family members.. It's enough to cope with, isn't it?
..At the moment you're doing really well, but how would you feel if you had a baby stuck in hospital for weeks or months, and then with life-long physical and/or developmental problems? Could you cope with spending hours every day by an incubator in the NICU only able to hold baby's hand as you watch him/her struggle to survive, and support DH as he recovers, and give your DSs the childhood they deserve?

You are young, you have time. Maybe your happy, healthy third child is twinkling in DH's eye even now - but there's no hurry for him/her to land on the earth - you can give yourselves as long as you need to prepare, then choose the time when you're ready.

Had to reply to this:-

What a lovely post Robin. You are very right. Nothing more to add than a :T:T:T.

Beautiful

dorothy52

I absolutely agree, SS, Robin you expressed so eloquently what I, and I have no doubt, many others have been quietly thinking.

Hi Be Lucky - I have been meaning to delurk for a while and say hello. I have, of course, bumped into you on Piq's and Robin's diaries and have read your diary from the beginning. I know that you will go all bashful when I say this, but I am filled with admiration for your tenacity and perseverance, you really have had a run of bad luck and yet whenever I read your diary I always think that the phrase 'keep calm and carry on' could have been aimed at you.

You make me feel very humble and I recall one diary entry, in the summer I think it was, when DH and the boys and you went to the beach and you had a lovely day and you reflected on how happy and lucky you were. You are indeed blessed with a wonderful family, I just hope that they all appreciate all that you do for them.

Robin's right, you know. You are still young and I have no doubt that one day you will be on here telling us that you are expecting again and we will all celebrate with you.

Good luck with the carers allowance, and a massive well done on clearing so much debt whilst bringing up a family and working.