Smacking. Could you/would you/do you?

Plushchris

Also, I dont think anybody wants to smack their kids, I'm sure we'd all prefer it if they behaved themselves right?

janninew

cutestkids wrote: »

All these people who are going on at SailorSam should really mind their own, you do not know what arrangement is in place with her sister or what circumstance dictates that they are in her care so often

Exactly what I was thinking, we have no idea of the circumstances and should not judge.

I have a new baby so smacking isn't an issue yet, not sure what I will do with regards to smacking, I was very occasionally smacked as a child and do remember thinking that I must have been very naughty to get a smack so I better not do it again!

I would never tell other parents how to discipline their children.

trolleyrun

Having grown up in a country where smacking children is illegal, I can safely say that I don't agree with smacking at all. I've never had a smack as a child, and I managed to grow up to be a respectable person who is educated, solvent and in full time employment. As far as I'm concerned, there are ways to discipline a child without using physical force. I always had the consequences explained to me, such as being grounded, favourite toy taken away etc. It was always carried through.

I believe that discipline should start on day one, in one form of another. Children learn very quickly how to play their parents, unfortunately. I do think that the word "discipline" itself has become a 'dirty' word lately, mainly associated with CP. Explanations, naughty step/corner, praise, and so on all forms part of discipline.

angelil

I'm 25. No kids yet. I think it COMPLETELY depends on the child and situation and I would never give a blanket "yes you should" or "no you shouldn't" type answer to this question. For two reasons: firstly, my younger sister was the kind of child that you only had to look at sternly for her to start crying, whereas I could be told six times to not do something and still do it anyway. My parents smacked me from time to time, but not my sister, because they deemed it necessary to make me understand that they meant business. It was rare that it went this far but occasionally it did happen and I don't think it harmed me.

Secondly, the situation. It would be wrong (in my view!) to smack a two-year-old for not putting their toys away (or something similarly trivial). It would not be wrong (again, in my view), however, to smack a two-year-old for running out into a streetful of cars.

Once the child gets to an age where you can actually reason with them there should be less and less reason to need to smack them.

Plushchris

This has reminded me of that episode of the Simpsons where Marge has the "Hip punishment" magazine and threatens to delete all of Barts Playstation memory card.. lol

willing2learn_3

SailorSam wrote: »

I haven't got any kids myself but often mind my two little nieces and there are times that i'll smack them, not often and only on the hand. But afterwards we'd have a cuddle and say sorry to each other, them for being naughty and me for smacking.

I'm sure you mean well by this - but consider that all it could teach them is it's ok if someone smacks you as long as they say sorry after.....that's a recipe for accepting future abuse by their partners

scooby088

For me smacking comes from anger, can't say either one is good really i would never smack but that's me. It shows that you have lost control of the situation.

theoldcynic

I find it strange that if you smack an adult it is classed as assault and/or battery.

If you smack an animal it is often classed as animal cruelty.

It can be hard to reason with both animals and adults even in terms of personal safety, but does it justify harming them?

However if you smack a child it is seen as 'discipline'.

Something seems amiss here. I think many children can see it too.

liney

scooby088 wrote: »

For me smacking comes from anger, can't say either one is good really i would never smack but that's me. It shows that you have lost control of the situation.

Or can't be bothered to stick to more long term disciplinary methods.

Consistancy breeds good behavior, not smacking. The only justification I understand is a gut reasponse to a child doing something very dangerous.

My son is a bit old for the naughty step as he is comming up to 8. Nowdays I count down from 3 and if I get to 1 and he hasn't stopped X, I start deducting pocket money in 10p increments. He only gets £1 so it rarely happens.

krlyr

neneromanova wrote: »

I smack my children, but only when they deserve it. I had it done to me and I turned out to be a respectable citizen, my sister on the other hand was never smacked and she turned out like a spoilt brat and is alwaysrude, naughty, disrespectful. (see other thread)

On the other hand, I was never smacked (total daddy's girl) and my little brother was frequently smacked (little rascal who was always in trouble). I'm the respectable citizen with the stable job, long term relationship and mortgage, he's the one who is living with my mum rent-free, can't hold down a job or a girlfriend and has been in trouble several times with the police/courts/bailiffs. He's not much of a "pro-smacking" poster boy!

As theoldcynic said - if it was an adult, it's an assault, there is so much emphasis on positive-reinforcement in pet dogs, why do kids end up with the short straw?