overwhelmed new member

Coco114

Ha ha ha Sista your animations are brilliant

Masonn , am very glad you dropped in I hope you had a productive week ?

You will be pleased to know I have been thinking very positively this afternoon. I know my kids are decent and I know that they love us both - thats a nice thing to know
If they want to come & go between 2 homes that's fine - whatever makes them happy makes me happy !
When I spoke to ex earlier - I was looking for reassurance , which to a certain extent I got. But , he admitted they are better off with me because , put simply , he can't cope. Can't deal with the house , can't deal with the stress , can't deal with the money etc,etc. I admired the honesty tbh.

He then said , the boys want to live with him not me & most men wouldn't have been as decent as he has been to me .... :rotfl:

Hopefully the council man will have some positive news - will see what he says. CAB were v helpful so I hope that things will start to sort themselves out a bit

Above all , I am very proud of myself and how I have dealt with this - I genuinely feel a lot less stressed and chilled now. After generally chatting with eldest earlier I know that they love their dad to bits (& quite right too !) but, they don't miss anything - they know exactly what's what. And I am very grateful for it !

Here's to a good week for all of us

Coco x

chevalier

Coco114 wrote: »

I didn't respond tbh , but my bill to him for this month should read :
1/2 Kids phone bills £15
Feeding him twice a week 4 weeks , plus endless coffee etc = £40
1/2 dinner money kids = £40
+ feeding them for the 10 weekends he promised to have them but didn't = at least £100 ?!
1/2 haircuts kids so £10 a monto
1/2 stationary / school supplies / school trip money/ presents for friends parties etc / dentist appts / school club fees / etc etc etc

I would never do it , but , you get my point .....
Still making me laugh tho :rotfl:

The thing he does something nice ... Then stamps all over it !

Never mind - toad in the hole was yummy .... Not many toads in it but the kids didn't seem to notice lol

Coco x

Sorry BUT WHY NOT DO JUST THAT. He is taking the p*ss out of you SO much. I would have said what the other poster did about no it being extra. There is being nice and to be frank there is being a doormat. He is treating you as the latter. Makes me mad (at him) that he is manipulating you so much, that you think that this is something to laugh about not get angry about.

Coco114

Hi Chev - hope you are well ?

In answer to your question - honestly - because I don't have the energy to fight with him over petty things. As to if I am being nice or a doormat ? Probably both I suspect

It took me every bit of mental energy to end the relationship in the first place - 12 months of hell tbh. I don't want to go back there again , I don't want him in my face again. All I want is him to pay the full half of mortgage and loan - that's it no more. I will be more than happy with that

Maybe that makes me weak ? I don't know. I just need to use the energy to keeping a roof over my kids heads at the moment and that's what I am trying to do. Not wasting my energy on someone like that

Right best get my skates on .... Monday madness has begun !!!!!

Coco x

Coco114

Meant to say - I don't find the situation anything to laugh at believe me , sometimes I do get angry - but it gets me nowhere.

All I try to do is keep my sense of humour and laugh about how ridiculous it all is. If I didn't I think I would go a teeny, tiny bit mental

vasseur

Coco114 wrote: »

Meant to say - I don't find the situation anything to laugh at believe me , sometimes I do get angry - but it gets me nowhere.

All I try to do is keep my sense of humour and laugh about how ridiculous it all is. If I didn't I think I would go a teeny, tiny bit mental

He will need to be told soon though....maybe the best way of doing it will be through humour. Just him admitting that he can't cope with kids, house and money isn't good enough - he's an adult for heaven's sake - we all have to deal with these things and we just muddle through sometimes but one thing is we can't ignore them.

Hope you have a good week

chevalier

Sorry if I was a bit harsh. I just don't like seeing good people being taken advantage of. You have been so dignified, but I do wonder if now is the time to take the gloves off a bit.

I really hope the man from the council comes through for you this week.

Ref the secured loan, have you actually put your circumstances in a letter to them, or just phoned to asked for a longer term etc? They 'might' take more notice if it is in writing.

apologies again
chev

Coco114

Hi Chev

It's fine honestly.
We have been through the money so many times - he knows the score. I think half the problem is he feels like he is giving "me" money ? It's all a form of punishment - I ended relationship so I can deal with the fallout - he appears to have forgotten what he put me through though .... Conveniently I might add

Anyway , we are getting there slowly .... I just get tired of explaining the same thing over and over again. And I can't stall this forever so I just want it sorted now.

Council man did say he would get back to me this week so fingers crossed. I hate talking at work so I emailed again today , and explained the situation fully so at least he has all the facts & figures - hopefully he can help

Secured are aware of situation completely though it may be a good idea to write & explain fully , in fact I will do that tomorrow lunchtime !!! It can't hurt.

A very busy day again today - I love going to work and switching off from all the problems , it keeps me sane :T
Did a couple of little surveys , organised my car so I should know the score by end of week , finally set up council tax direct debit and made a couple of money saving calls - so all in all , a good day !

Coco x

PinotGrigio41

Hi Coco,

Great to hear you sounding so positive and still smiling in amongst the chaos and grief. Plastering on the big manic grin is my favourite pastime despite any rubbish going on around us !:D

Cant believe how many readers you have had,thats amazing, you obviously are keeping everyones interest !Oh and well doen ont he surveys, I am in trouble over on my diary for not doing them :rotfl:
Its been slapped wrists for Mrs Pinot, thats why I am hidign here for a while !!!

Your conversation with Sista made me laugh , Wham posters, bunking off of school ! Who did you have on your wall, Andrew, Georgie or both ?!!

Feel the same as you re working, it certainly keeps me sane when I think I may go a bit bonkers otherwise. There are many days though where I wish I could be a lady of leisure as Im many of us do, and have a few lazy days doing whatever we want to , with money no object !!

I wont mention the situation with your Ex, you are already getting loads of advice from others on here and you clearly know what you are and arent willing to put up with !

I really hope your week goes well xxx

Coco114

Pinot really ??!! 4am ? Why so early ?!
And next time you are up & about that early ..... Wake me up before you go go !!!!!! :rotfl:
Sorry bit early for poor jokes

It was George for me .... If only I knew then what I knew now ha ha !!

Get on with your Surveys Mrs P .... Every 0.20p helps I guess

Tuesday already , it's lashing with rain today but as I am at work all day it doesn't really matter. Youngest won't be happy though - he told me it's "bordering on child abuse to make me walk home in the rain " :rotfl:

Right , cuppa time , then on with the madness .....
I really hope council man rings me today - even if it's only to feel like something's working away in the background ! And will write letter to Secured today as well - worth a shot.

Have a great day all

Coco x

slowlyfading

Hope you have a good day today