Wedding Outfit

Kaz2904

I wouldn't have dreamed of telling either my MiL or my Aunty (who raised me) what to wear :eek: how rude! They are both old enough to be my parents and have been dressing themselves for several years.
We did have many a laugh at what monstrosity my actual Mother would turn up in though when we were having tea the night before the wedding but that was just between myself and the Bridesmaids. Surprisingly, even she turned up in something suitable and actually looked very smart. Thankful that she didn't turn up in one of her leather mini skirt combos or her jeans, fluffy socks and stilettos outfits .

Scrapaholic

I agree with the suggestions of going out to look and do have a look ,you may see something you like . If you don't see anything maybe you could say you'd like to think about your outfit a bit more . You said if only you had the nerve . As long as you have a suitable outfit , not the same as th MOB's and in a non clashing colour, what's the problem ? Surely you cannot be forced to buy something that you don't want . The money cannot be taken from you without your consent . Hope you get sorted with something you all like . Weddings are meant to be happy but I know from being MOB and MOG that it's sometimes very stressful !

Brighton_belle

caeler wrote: »

Maybe MOB is reaching out to you? A 'nice' thing to do together and buy your outfits. Rather than decline outright, agree to go, make the day about her, let her find her outfit, run out of time to find yours and finish with a coffee and cake! A nice bit of bonding for the mothers, you might make a new friend at the same time.

This sounds a nice idea and I get where you are coming from, but for some of us, a girlie clothes shop trip is our worst nightmare and I would find such a trip truely awful. I wouldn't find it bonding becaue it would be like nails down a blackboard for x hrs, and I can't help that's how clothes shopping is for me. I am private and quiet when it comes to clothes shopping, it's just the way some of us are.

At my wedding last Autumn I didn't care what my mum or m-in- law wore, I was just so happy they were there. Both wore clothes they had owned for years. We all had a happy happy time.

FlacosFloozie

We got married last year. My MIL bought her outfit months before I did and my mum got hers later. They both opted for different colours but we diidn't have an overly fixed scheme and I wanted them to wear what they liked. Likewise my bridesmaid picked the colour of her dress. My dad did wear a kilt to blend in with the groom/ushers but chose all the bits to go with it. You should get to wear what you like (although floor length and white may not go down well )

belfastgirl23

caeler wrote: »

Maybe MOB is reaching out to you? A 'nice' thing to do together and buy your outfits. Rather than decline outright, agree to go, make the day about her, let her find her outfit, run out of time to find yours and finish with a coffee and cake! A nice bit of bonding for the mothers, you might make a new friend at the same time.

I wondered about this too, but then again you know the people involved OP. Is it a way of trying to bring the families together? In which case I would go along at least for a little while but say on the day that Auntie Jenny or whoever it is really wanted to go shopping with you so you're just window shopping for today because she would be sooo disappointed not to be there when you choose your outfit. And if there are different styles it's definitely worth being honest about this and just saying that an outfit is really stylish or glamorous or whatever but that you wouldn't really be comfortable in it (even admitting you might be an old stick in the mud).

But to start with I'd be trying to go into it thinking the best of people unless that's really impossible. This family will be in your life and will be most likely standing over a crib with you at some point so I would be trying my best to find the positives just now.

nearlyrich

When my brother got married many years ago my Mum (MOG) had a lovely suit in a very bright colour that she wouldn't have normally worn, her much younger and slimmer sister turned up in the same suit in a much smaller size, Auntie was mortified Mum didn't bother at all and my Dad and my Uncle thought it was funny to swap the jackets at the night do!

It's a bit of a minefield these days..........good luck.

*max*

If I ever got married, it wouldn't even enter my mind to tell anyone what they should be wearing. I'm thinking that if they were coming to my wedding, they would be people I would trust to have appropriate taste on the day, and if they didn't...well, so what?

Mind you, I'm also not the kind of person who would have a "colour scheme" at her wedding!

If I was lucky enough to get married with my mum attending, she could bloody well wear a Star Trek suit, I wouldn't care! I know she would ask me though, so I would go shopping with her, and find something that suits her and that she loved. Why so much angst over one day???

MrsDrink

carefullycautious wrote: »

I think what I need to know is how to say 'no' I am going to look myself with a relative whom I trust for something I am comfortable with.

Without going into too many details - could you suggest making a 'day of it' and invite your trusted relative to come along as well?

I wouldn't dream of telling my mum or MrD's mum what they were not allowed to wear at our wedding (July 2012 :T). Funnily I had an email from my mum saying she'd seen a dress she liked but it was Navy - I replied saying "so?".

claire16c

I dont see why you cant just go shopping but only try on stuff you like? If the clothes they like are not to your taste - then suggest she tries whatever it is on and not you. And you could always split up part way through the trip to go to different shops you each prefer and meet back up again for lunch/coffee if it gets too much.

I went shopping with my mum for her outfit for my wedding, because she wanted my advice. My husbands mother we just told to please avoid wearing the same colour as my mum, which was fine for her as she wanted a different colour anyway. I would never have actually instructed someone to wear a specific outfit. They both knew what the bridesmaids were wearing, so knew to avoid that as obviously neither of them wanted to look like them!

RubyRue

When we got married our colour scheme was blue, it so happened that both mother of the bride and mother of the groom wore blue but in no way did I tell them what to wear, I was happy with whatever they chose as long as they were happy and felt comfortable with it. My mam did choose a few outfits and asked my opinion that was it.

I have a feeling when they we picked the colour they decided to go with tie in. It if they chose something different it wouldn't have bothered me in the slightest.