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Family fight - what would you do?
Comments
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I've got it.
The CHILD involved believes someone else is his bio father.
The not actually bio 'father' believes he is the bio father.
The CSA believes the not actually bio 'father' is the father.
The the 'now stepfather' was boffing the mother whilst she was with the not actually bio 'father'. Or would like you to think he was. Or she didn't mention that she was still sleeping with the not actually bio 'father' at the same time. Or did a hasty bit of date rearranging once she realised she was pregnant so the not actually bio didn't cotton on and batter the living daylights out of her/the stepfather or dump her. Or dumped the the 'now stepfather' and only realised she was up the duff when she had decided to stay with the not actually bio 'father'.
Or there is another really is bio father out there who hasn't got a clue.
And all this drama is played out with 2 supposedly adult men still battling over an older man who got with both their mothers at some point in the last 40 years. Or one who isn't happy his father went to live with the other's mother in that time.
If the OP's other half opens his trap, he's going to hurt a kid. One that will find out his bio father isn't his father, his stepfather is his father, his mother slept around/isn't quite sure/couldn't make her mind up/tossed a coin/and should have stuck with tossing something else, that his stepfather who is his real father was ashamed to say his son was his son, but was OK with him as a stepson.
Oh, and he adds to the hurt the senior stepfather will feel as he will theoretically know he is now not missing a stepgrandson, but a bio grandson that he wasn't allowed to know about and isn't allowed to see in any case and that his own son/stepson lied about rather than admit he had....
So gobbing off about it will hurt an older (old?) man and a child most.
What sort of man would that make him?I could dream to wide extremes, I could do or die: I could yawn and be withdrawn and watch the world go by.Yup you are officially Rock n Roll
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Ah, so if it all comes out then the person who thought he was the bio father might stop paying maintenance ...52% tight0
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Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »I've got it.
The CHILD involved believes someone else is his bio father.
The not actually bio 'father' believes he is the bio father.
The CSA believes the not actually bio 'father' is the father.
The the 'now stepfather' was boffing the mother whilst she was with the not actually bio 'father'. Or would like you to think he was. Or she didn't mention that she was still sleeping with the not actually bio 'father' at the same time. Or did a hasty bit of date rearranging once she realised she was pregnant so the not actually bio didn't cotton on and batter the living daylights out of her/the stepfather or dump her. Or dumped the the 'now stepfather' and only realised she was up the duff when she had decided to stay with the not actually bio 'father'.
Or there is another really is bio father out there who hasn't got a clue.
And all this drama is played out with 2 supposedly adult men still battling over an older man who got with both their mothers at some point in the last 40 years. Or one who isn't happy his father went to live with the other's mother in that time.
If the OP's other half opens his trap, he's going to hurt a kid. One that will find out his bio father isn't his father, his stepfather is his father, his mother slept around/isn't quite sure/couldn't make her mind up/tossed a coin/and should have stuck with tossing something else, that his stepfather who is his real father was ashamed to say his son was his son, but was OK with him as a stepson.
Oh, and he adds to the hurt the senior stepfather will feel as he will theoretically know he is now not missing a stepgrandson, but a bio grandson that he wasn't allowed to know about and isn't allowed to see in any case and that his own son/stepson lied about rather than admit he had....
So gobbing off about it will hurt an older (old?) man and a child most.
What sort of man would that make him?
Right on the button by the sound of it. I started to try to work it out but got so confuzzled that I gave up, stand by what I said though OP, extend the odd invitation to make it clear that it's his choice but otherwise ignore it.Eat food. Not too much. Mostly plants - Michael Pollan
48 down, 22 to go
Low carb, low oxalate Primal + dairy
From size 24 to 16 and now stuck...0 -
There's also the chance that BIL made the whole thing up in a moment of anger, just to score points.52% tight0
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*Walks in, looks around, scratches head and walks out quietly...*Stone walls do not a prison make, nor iron bars a cage.0
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Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »I've got it.
The CHILD involved believes someone else is his bio father.
The not actually bio 'father' believes he is the bio father.
The CSA believes the not actually bio 'father' is the father.
The the 'now stepfather' was boffing the mother whilst she was with the not actually bio 'father'. Or would like you to think he was. Or she didn't mention that she was still sleeping with the not actually bio 'father' at the same time. Or did a hasty bit of date rearranging once she realised she was pregnant so the not actually bio didn't cotton on and batter the living daylights out of her/the stepfather or dump her. Or dumped the the 'now stepfather' and only realised she was up the duff when she had decided to stay with the not actually bio 'father'.
Or there is another really is bio father out there who hasn't got a clue.
And all this drama is played out with 2 supposedly adult men still battling over an older man who got with both their mothers at some point in the last 40 years. Or one who isn't happy his father went to live with the other's mother in that time.
If the OP's other half opens his trap, he's going to hurt a kid. One that will find out his bio father isn't his father, his stepfather is his father, his mother slept around/isn't quite sure/couldn't make her mind up/tossed a coin/and should have stuck with tossing something else, that his stepfather who is his real father was ashamed to say his son was his son, but was OK with him as a stepson.
Oh, and he adds to the hurt the senior stepfather will feel as he will theoretically know he is now not missing a stepgrandson, but a bio grandson that he wasn't allowed to know about and isn't allowed to see in any case and that his own son/stepson lied about rather than admit he had....
So gobbing off about it will hurt an older (old?) man and a child most.
What sort of man would that make him?
Cor blimey, they could make an Eastenders plotline run for weeks out of that.Accept your past without regret, handle your present with confidence and face your future without fear0 -
Ah, its the chemical formula for a biological weapon of mass destruction. When the highlighted hydroxyl ion becomes unstable, it's all going to explode........ MiL
SDiL
........ ¦..............¦
OP--OH ..GF1----SB----GF2
................... ¦ ...... ¦
............... Child 2 Child 1
................Child 3Hi, we’ve had to remove your signature. If you’re not sure why please read the forum rules or email the forum team if you’re still unsure - MSE ForumTeam0 -
Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »The CSA believes the not actually bio 'father' is the father.
You are my cynical hero! I also suspect you're dead right "Growth for growth's sake is the ideology of the cancer cell" - Edward Abbey.0 -
But then [not having quite grasped all the details], the not actually bio father might have been paying for this lie for all these years.Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »I've got it.
....
The CSA believes the not actually bio 'father' is the father.
....
So gobbing off about it will hurt an older (old?) man and a child most.Hi, we’ve had to remove your signature. If you’re not sure why please read the forum rules or email the forum team if you’re still unsure - MSE ForumTeam0 -
Must not look at threads like this on my lunchbreak. Now i'm confused!Current debt: M&S £0(£2K) , Tesco £0 (£1.5K), Car loan 6K (paid off!) Barclaycard £1.5K (interest free for 18 months)0
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