Help for seperated fathers?

[Deleted User]

copa_feela wrote: »

Have you not heard of a meter?

Yes, she was on a meter! Delightful Lady to visit, was never allowed a bath and instructed to only flush the toilet after a number 2!!! Lovely!!!

midnight_express

The bottom line is you are not going to be entitled to any benefits. If you want to rent a flat on your own you are going to have to cut your expenditure in other areas. Lots of people feed a family of four on £50 a week. There are lots of money saving ideas on the old style board. If you've got a car getting rid of it might save a lot of money.
Welcome to world of the childfree - we are the ones who support ourselves and the rest of society.

flutterby_lil

Ralphy101 wrote: »

Im sorry ... i fogot to mention

I live in Devon

a 1 bedroom house... or flat will be at least £550 a month

Council tax £120
Child maint. £200
Utlities £100
Water £50
Tv li. £12
Food £50 a week (minimum)

thats 66 left .... without fuel, insurance,

she left me... she;ll get everything paid for her..

just seems wrong to me.... and no your right i dont have to have overnight stays but the key issue is... i want it...

a joke !

For a family of 4 in a three story house our utilites are less than £100 per month. Our water is only £12 per month so you should save money there.

Food, we never spend £50 a week on food - you can easily eat off £20 a week for just you and your child when he is there.

Sammyj0e

I'm confused OP, you say you want to be responsible and pay child support, yet you seem to think that in doing this it entitles you to that money back through the state somehow? why would that be so?

Sixer

Just to confirm that water bills are ludicrous in the south west. To the extent that the PM has just confirmed we'll all be getting £50 back on our bills from central funds. SOMEONE has to pay for clean beaches for tourists, and it's we poor southwesterly chaps who are doing it. My water bill - metered - is about £50 a month, and that's with water butts for garden and car washing, shared baths, toilet bricks, water efficient dishwasher and washing machine, and any other water-saving measure you can think of.

Having said that, there's a bedsit in the next road to me up for rent now. £60 pw.

cte1111

If you are renting on your own, then you will be able to claim the 25% single person's discount on your council tax, so that would be a bit more in the pot.

I tend to agree that you are currently over-estimating your monthly bills. Bottom line is - you need to work out how to afford to live on your own now.

Instead of bemoaning what your ex may / may not be receiving, it's best to be realistic and figure out if you can afford what you want / need. Is it possible to rent a 1 bedroom flat with a sofa bed in the lounge? Or maybe a 2 bed in an area that isn't so desirable. You want to support your child and carry on seeing him as much as possible, so work on budgets and compromise rather than looking for 'help' that doesn't exist for your situation.

lazer

What about applying for custody of the child?

I know it is usually the mothers who are favored by the courts, but maybe try and see what happens

As for accommodation, look into lodging, as it may be more likely that it would be suitable for your child to stay overnight.

IMO - the shared rate for under 35's should not not apply to NRP's with overnight access, as its not in the childs best interest.

Also I agree that the maintenance paid should be discounted as income for MTB's, it is for the mother after all, so why not the father.

This is the catch that newly seperated parents find, the NRP will move heaven and earth to see the child (I know not all NRP's do - but a lot do), they get no help with suitable housing for the child for what can be 3 nights a week, whereas the PWC gets help with housing, tax credits etc for 4 nights a week, and also gets the maintenance from the NRP.
The PWC can move to the other end of the country and the NRP has to fund teh travel to see the child.

The system was set up to chase absent dads and make them pay, it is not really suitable for use when the NRP is actually involved in the childs life.

gingergee

There are often flats in Bampton (north Devon) for about 400pcm x Oh and i feed a family of 6 (including a 13 yr old who eats like a horse lol) for 40-50 a week. I buy meat and veg, then use leftovers for soups. I bake my own pies and cakes (under supervision lol in case i burn the house down!) We have a roast every sunday, then the meat is used for sandwiches for kids lunches etc. Anything is possible if you try hard enough x

Oldernotwiser

lazer wrote: »

IMO - the shared rate for under 35's should not not apply to NRP's with overnight access, as its not in the childs best interest.

Unless the separated parents live some distance away from each other, there's really no reason why weekend access has to involve overnight stays as most children would rather sleep in their own room.

Having the child overnight for the weekend often seems to be for the benefit of the PWC's social life rather than for the good of the child(ren).

skibadee

For goodness sake the OP is paying to support his child, wants to spend time with his child and gets slated.
Maybe he can find cheaper accomodation to rent and cut down on a few things food etc., but he is trying to do the right thing by his child.......as many others he is not a NRP by choice.
I for one agree it is not right that any PWC does not have maintenance payments taken into account as income when assessments for WTC. CTC, HB and CTB are done, the system is very wrong.