Boys into Ladies Toilets

liney

My son will use the ladies until i deem he is old enough to use the mens alone. I suppose that will be about 8, knowing the other male children in my family.

When he was in a buggy, i would use the disabled facilities, because like the above poster i would not leave the buggy unattended. Obviously if a disabled person was waiting when i appeared i would apologise, but i think i was perfectly within my rights to do so to enable me to supervise my baby. No one ever complained.

Do your sons who use the disabled facilities never play out without supervision then? There are many places to meet unsavoury charators apart from public toilets.

Becles

The eldest has been going in since about 7-8, the youngest often followed him (2 year age gap). They didn't like urinals and would both go into a cubicle together, although I'm not sure if they do that or not now they are a bit older. That was there choice, so I just let them get on with it!

Nicki

Smashing wrote:

We'll have to just agree to disagree on this one.

Not a chance of that I'm afraid. I find those who express such narrow minded and ill informed views as you have done about those with a disability as bigoted and prejudiced as those who express homophobic, sexist or racist views, and will challenge them wherever I find them. Is it just incontinence which you don't understand, or would you also say that epileptics "have to learn to sit still", those in wheelchairs "have to learn not to be lazy", etc? With the benefit of a good night's sleep do you still stand by your views?

To the poster who commented about leaving her 10 month old child outside the loo, I wouldn't object to someone using the disabled loo in those circumstances if there was no mother and baby room available. Where I live however there is usually a large cubicle in the ladies for this purpose or a dedicated mother and baby room with a toilet. Kids are only in buggies for a couple of years. However if everyone in the country adopted the same approach as some of the posters here, with the result that everyone with children up to the age of about 12 used the disabled loos, those who genuinely need them would have no chance of getting in!

jordylass

coolio wrote:

Who has mentioned being worried about someone being gay? Surely they're worried about paedos fullstop. Most molest boys AND girls. DO NOT mix sexuality and paedophilia together, they are in no way related.

I apologise profusely if anything in my post came across as homophobic. The point I was trying to make was that there was no more risk in the men's toilets, than there is anywhere else. Changing rooms, schools, or the most common place for abuse which is with someone they know....

A quick look around the net found this though

[FONT=Book Antiqua, Times New Roman, Times] One of the most thorough of the studies of offenders reports data obtained from sex offenders at the Minnesota Security Hospital (Erickson, Walbek and Seely, 1988). Consecutive cases over a 10-year period involving offences against children under 14 years of age were examined. [/FONT]
[FONT=Book Antiqua, Times New Roman, Times] Over two-thirds offended against girls,[/FONT]
[FONT=Book Antiqua, Times New Roman, Times] about a quarter against boys [/FONT]
[FONT=Book Antiqua, Times New Roman, Times]and only 4% against both sexes.
[/FONT]

So I would have to disagree with your comments, that sexuality does not affect which victim a peadophile chooses.

Edited to include link: http://www.ipce.info/host/howitt/index.htm

Unknown1234_2

8 is approaching the age where it is becoming inappropriate.

He is a boy capable of doing all that needs to be done himself and therefore should use the boys toilets.

stas4949

Hi Nicki

I think you are taking this way too personally, I understand you have a disabled child and want to protect her dignity, why wouldn't you, however there are parents on here that feel just as strongly about protecting their child/children. You can't watch them all the time however you can lessen the risk!

Just for the record my boys started using mens toilets from the age of about 8 before that they came into the ladies with me.

jordylass

stas4949 wrote:

Hi Nicki

I think you are taking this way too personally, I understand you have a disabled child and want to protect her dignity, why wouldn't you, however there are parents on here that feel just as strongly about protecting their child/children. You can't watch them all the time however you can lessen the risk!

Just for the record my boys started using mens toilets from the age of about 8 before that they came into the ladies with me.

I disagree, if parents feel so strongly that they are willing to inconvenience a disabled person, then either they should remain at home or where facilities are more convenient/safe!! or campaign for seperate toilets for parents/children where they can accompany their children until they feel they are old enough to use toilets unaccompanied.

The disabled toilets are not there for over protective parents!

Unknown1234_2

jordylass wrote:

The disabled toilets are not there for over protective parents!

I agree with this for children either gender over the age of around 8.

If mother and baby facilities are not provided then i would hope a disabled person would understand that they are not using the disabled toilets to be selfish.

viccig

I realise that it must be frustrating to see people using Disabled toilets when there is no need for them to, however I must add that I always use the disabled loos when im with my son and pushchair-theres no alternative in my eyes (ps where I live a toilet in a mother and baby room is rare!) Secondly if my OH were alone with the kids I would be furious if he took them in the gents I really dont think its an appropriate place for a young child to be.

I would obviously let a disabled person have priority over myself and kids, but if I got a load of abuse from someone I'd be just as angry- we all have needs!Granted they may be different, but the safety and well being of my kids is just as important to me as yours is to you.

stas4949

jordylass wrote:

I disagree, if parents feel so strongly that they are willing to inconvenience a disabled person, then either they should remain at home or where facilities are more convenient/safe!! or campaign for seperate toilets for parents/children where they can accompany their children until they feel they are old enough to use toilets unaccompanied.

The disabled toilets are not there for over protective parents!

I think you misunderstood me, I did not say it was ok for parents with children to use disabled toilets I was purely expressing that the feeling of protection that Nicki has for her daughter is what most parents feel for their children (for whatever their reasons).
What you state about remaining at home where facilities are "safe" is ridiculous!!!!!!!!!!!! Maybe you also think disabled people should stay at home!
We are not discussing the fact of people using disabled toilets because they are more convenient but the fact that parents would use them for the safety of their children!
We each need to do what we feel is right for our child/children whatever the situation as it is the individual that will live with the "ifs & buts" if anything happened.