Moving on...

AimeesMum_2

Hiya everyone!

Looking for you to cheer me up lol

I am 23yrs old with two children and have recently split up with my partner of 5 years.

I just can't see how I can ever move on?

Surely no-one is ever going to want or love me with this baggage My ex is rathr psycho and freely admits that although he doesn't want to be with me that he won't let anyone else bring up his kids.

I'm just feel so lonely and while I don't want another relationship, I would like to think that sometime in the future, I would be part of a stable relationship with someone who accepts me kids as his own. Do you have a relationship with someone who has accepted your kids? did you feel the same way as me at the beginning? xx

LisaB85

AimeesMum wrote: »

Hiya everyone!

Looking for you to cheer me up lol

I am 23yrs old with two children and have recently split up with my partner of 5 years.

I just can't see how I can ever move on?

Surely no-one is ever going to want or love me with this baggage My ex is rathr psycho and freely admits that although he doesn't want to be with me that he won't let anyone else bring up his kids.

I'm just feel so lonely and while I don't want another relationship, I would like to think that sometime in the future, I would be part of a stable relationship with someone who accepts me kids as his own. Do you have a relationship with someone who has accepted your kids? did you feel the same way as me at the beginning? xx

Didn't want to read and run. I have no kids but I have seen men who take on and accept their partners kids, a man doesn't have to 'made' the children to be a father.

My Aunt had 2 young kids when she met her now husband, her kids biological father is non existent but her husband is a great dad to her kids.

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Plenty of good men out there.



And it has fekkkkk all to do with your ex what you do with your life from now on - and the law is on your side there.

londonsurrey

You have already moved on. You've divested yourself of a selfish b****rd who freely admits that he puts "ownership" of his children ahead of their wellbeing and happiness. That is a massive step.

Saturnalia

It's probably totally normal to feel like you'll never find love again immediately after the break-up of a long term relationship, as even if things were going badly and you took charge and ended it, it is still a massive shock to the system and a big change of lifestyle, and all change is scary at first even when the change is for the better.

But look around you and read on here and see how many step-families & blended families there are, plenty of people don't mind taking on someone else's children!

And have a Google, there must be forums and real-life groups & events for single parents so you could make friends in the same boat, and when you feel ready to date again, surely there are dating websites aimed at parents.

Desperado99

AimeesMum wrote: »

Hiya everyone!

My ex is rathr psycho and freely admits that although he doesn't want to be with me that he won't let anyone else bring up his kids.

As he's no longer with you, that's not really his choice is it?

People do move on, it just happens.....

My BIL married a lady with two kids (and a pyscho ex ) the youngest being only 18mths when they got together. It does happen.

balletshoes

AimeesMum wrote: »

Hiya everyone!

Looking for you to cheer me up lol

I am 23yrs old with two children and have recently split up with my partner of 5 years.

I just can't see how I can ever move on?

Surely no-one is ever going to want or love me with this baggage My ex is rathr psycho and freely admits that although he doesn't want to be with me that he won't let anyone else bring up his kids.

I'm just feel so lonely and while I don't want another relationship, I would like to think that sometime in the future, I would be part of a stable relationship with someone who accepts me kids as his own. Do you have a relationship with someone who has accepted your kids? did you feel the same way as me at the beginning? xx

oh bless you - you're 23, anyone past the age of 21 has baggage, its just different types of baggage .

make time for your family and friends right now, the future and future relationships will happen for you, but no-one except you is responsible for your happiness. If you find your own contentment, you will be someone who attracts people to you.

Northern_Princess

AimeesMum wrote: »

Hiya everyone!

Looking for you to cheer me up lol

I am 23yrs old with two children and have recently split up with my partner of 5 years.

I just can't see how I can ever move on?

Surely no-one is ever going to want or love me with this baggage My ex is rathr psycho and freely admits that although he doesn't want to be with me that he won't let anyone else bring up his kids.

I'm just feel so lonely and while I don't want another relationship, I would like to think that sometime in the future, I would be part of a stable relationship with someone who accepts me kids as his own. Do you have a relationship with someone who has accepted your kids? did you feel the same way as me at the beginning? xx

I could have written this myself 15 years ago After a LONG time of staying at my ex's beck and call, and hiding the fact I'd met someone else from him he eventually found out. Fast forward 3 years of the ex's tantrums, threats, messing the kids about with contact etc we finally divorced and I remarried. My children unfortunately refused to see their natural dad because of his behaviour and I can honestly say yes I met someone who from early on in our relationship accepted the kids as his own. I felt exactly the same way your feeling now and life moves on, although sometimes I never thought it would x

recurrent-ostrich

Just wanted to reassure you. My first husband left me when I was 29 and pregnant with his second child, with a 7 month old baby too. I felt like you, that no-one would ever want me again and so on.

I met my now husband just over a year later, when my second baby was six month old and we've been together for 10 years now. He's a fantastic Dad to both of the older ones and we've had another child together. The elder two's "father" never ever sees them (his choice) and as far as everyone is concerned they are my husband's children (it's no-one elses business)

Mojisola

AimeesMum wrote: »

My ex is rathr psycho and freely admits that although he doesn't want to be with me that he won't let anyone else bring up his kids.

If he ever puts this in writing, texts or emails it, save the messages in case you need to get some legal help against him in the future.

victory

AimeesMum wrote: »

Hiya everyone!

Looking for you to cheer me up lol

I am 23yrs old with two children and have recently split up with my partner of 5 years.

I just can't see how I can ever move on?

Surely no-one is ever going to want or love me with this baggage My ex is rathr psycho and freely admits that although he doesn't want to be with me that he won't let anyone else bring up his kids.

I'm just feel so lonely and while I don't want another relationship, I would like to think that sometime in the future, I would be part of a stable relationship with someone who accepts me kids as his own. Do you have a relationship with someone who has accepted your kids? did you feel the same way as me at the beginning? xx

Your baggage is two lovely children , men love kids, their own or other kids, they are not baggage, you are your own unique person with special qualities and your children show you are loving, giving person that is worthy of love and to be loved, the future is out there for your taking, enjoy:D