am I being unreasonable?

pinkshoes

Why couldn't she just put the child car seat in the instructor's car and take her son with her on the driving lesson?????

elvis86

pinkshoes wrote: »

Why couldn't she just put the child car seat in the instructor's car and take her son with her on the driving lesson?????

I'm guessing that a driving instructor wouldn't be happy with that! The last thing a learner driver needs is the distraction of a kid in the back - it's bad enough for an experienced driver!

rachbc

elvis86 wrote: »

I'm guessing that a driving instructor wouldn't be happy with that! The last thing a learner driver needs is the distraction of a kid in the back - it's bad enough for an experienced driver!

But something she will need to get used and probably good to get practice in!

londonsurrey

She sounds like a silly girl trying it on. What is especially unacceptable is the fact that she's letting her child feel the pressure, when with all these alternative carers, he should actually be assured that yes, there is a lot of negotiation involved as there are all these choices, but they all love him, and the worst case scenario is that TWO people turn up for him, and he gets to watch them being surprised, as opposed to not having anyone turn up.

meritaten

londonsurrey wrote: »

She sounds like a silly girl trying it on. What is especially unacceptable is the fact that she's letting her child feel the pressure, when with all these alternative carers, he should actually be assured that yes, there is a lot of negotiation involved as there are all these choices, but they all love him, and the worst case scenario is that TWO people turn up for him, and he gets to watch them being surprised, as opposed to not having anyone turn up.

lol - er his other nanny does occasionally turn up to pick up his cousin who is in the same class! and we are quick to tell him just who is taking him home.
He is constantly told that he is loved - every time I take him to nursery I whisper 'luv U' when he is giving me a 'bye bye kiss'! I also tell him WHO is picking him up!
He knows that mummy would rather be home with him - but that mummy needs to work to help pay the bills! (not sure he understands the concept of 'bills' tho) but he does know that you need money and you have to work for it!

It is the first time this has happened and tho I can and do use text - I really think she should firstly have spoken to me by phone and secondly not made out that she had previously told me when she hadnt!
Hope its all sorted now - and perhaps she wont take me or her mum so much for granted!

Savvy_Sue

I think something like this would make me consider how long this was going to go on for, and make noises if I didn't want to be doing this for the next 6 years. Or longer, if your son has more children ...

I mean, it's great when grandparents want to help out, but there has to be a limit!

MIL felt she had to give up work when HER mother said she had to keep DH on reins when they went to the park, because if he ran off then she wouldn't be able to run after him!

meritaten

When he starts proper school in September there is going to have a be a major rethink - but its a bit early right now. DIL is looking out for another job - but they are few and far between. its a shame she had to cancel the driving lessons - if she could drive it would widen her job options. I do feel a bit bad about that - if she had only let me know sooner perhaps I could have worked something out.

Mara69

meritaten - was it you that had a problem with your daughter in law at Christmas regarding school nativity?

meritaten

yes Mara - why?

faerie_girl

Have you spoken to your son about it too? Tell him it is getting too much for you and that they will need to find someone else or find paid childcare.
My Mum looks after my son a few hours a week here and there arranged about about 2 weeks in advance. I pay her a set amount each month which she initially refused but if she didn't have him then I'd been paying a lot more to a childminder. I also regularly check she is still happy with our agreement because I don't want her to start resenting me and DS.