MSE Pregnancy Club 24

Kitten_Pie

Hi All,

Just done a quick (well as quick as possible) ) read back.

gothtec congratulations on your little bundle, hope you heal well.

Don't think I have much to add, every time I thought I would reply someone said exactly what I would do . So just pretend all the insightful interesting posts were from me.

Hope everyone is well.

RebekahR

Now that is a nice welcome change for them to agree!!

little_miss_moneysaver_3

Thanks MrsM, never heard it beig called the osterich stage before. Can you start the next stage and come back to it. Hope you can get it finished too. I'm surrounded by papers and sweet wrappers here
SM you don't need to apologise to us. We're here to listen. Like I said before I glad I know know it's a boy now, otherwise I'd be feeling the same as you Fluffnutter if a boy popped out and I was feeling I had a girl all along I'd be worried I'dbe disappointed. Anyway.....SM what I was gong to say is it seems like some people just won't understand. It may be the older generation as they don't believe in these kind of "made up modern terms" like my grandma thinks there's no such thing as PND and in her day they just got on with it. Maybe in your mum's day (not saying she's old) I'm guessing as they didn't find out they just accepted what they got given and cracked on. This is a long ramble, but the jist of ot is a few of us on here have been slightly disappointed that we're not having what we felt we were/wanted/dreamt of however you want to word it. It be worth not trying to discuss it with your mum and instead share it with friends (like us) who have a bit of understanding. You're not alone and I hope the many who have posted make you feel a bit better. I'm sure once he pops out you'll be in love with him, and like you said you're becomming more used to the idea of a boy. My main worry is boys are better at weeing on people than girls. Will have to invest in a waterproof apron for nappy think me thinks.
Thanks MMM I am trying not too eat too much junk, but like I said writing/studying makes me crave sugar I'm trying to be extra careful as i'm very inactive with this SPD too and post birth the extra weight will be a strain on my joints.
Miss Money - can I ask where did you get your wheelchair? Seriously considering trying to get one for when we're out. It's getting too painful even to walk for 40 minutes.
Right look at the time.....I'm going into work mode now.
Bye for now!

fluffnutter

sexymouse wrote: »

I had another argument with my Mum yesterday afternoon when I tried to explain what gender disappointment was, and she told me that she was ashamed of me and that I was acting like a spoilt child and creating a scene and a drama.

Times have changed, sm. We're now far more understanding of psychological trauma about all sorts of things, and the current approach (which I happen to agree with) is that negative feelings are OK and it's far better to acknowledge them, explore them and overcome them.

No more the 'stiff upper lip', and the feeling that you have to be grateful about everything. Quite frankly, people used to bury these sorts of feelings (a far more extreme example but think about shell-shock after WWI) leading to immense emotional problems and utterly destroyed and miserable lives. It's not so long ago that the advice on losing a child in infancy was simply to 'have another one' and even call it by the same name!

TBH, my mum would be the same and she's a very caring, understanding person. It's just how they were brought up. You're taking your own time to come to terms with things - that's absolutely fine. You don't need to justify yourself to anyone else. That's your mum's agenda, not yours. Just calmly say 'this is my way of dealing with things'. Or ignore her, like you are doing!

jen77_2

Hi all.. Hope everyone is well.. I've been lurking for a few days trying to catch up on posts...
Just a quick mention that if anyone is looking for a cheap steriliser.. I've just got an Avent microwave one from
mothercare .. £9.99 from £24.99.
This is the one online but they r out of stock
http://www.mothercare.com/Philips-Avent-Microwave-Steam-Steriliser/373143,default,pd.html

Plenty in Leeds mothercare
Hope it helps😄

ikkle87

I'm fed up. Have actually just spent 10 minutes in tears.

Ordered some stuff from BabiesRUs and it's been dispatched, none of the night freight tracking works they've rung me and i missed the call so i rang back and someone answered and then just pressed loads of buttons and laughed down the phone so I have no idea when it's coming or anything and I need to know when its coming so I can have someone here to help cos the last parcel I got the delivery driver dumped it in the yard and I couldn't carry it in the house myself.

Then the hospital rang to say they've filled in a scan request card but because I'm having a growth scan at 28 weeks other people who aren't will get priority over me and as there is only cancellation slots left I should be aware that I might not get an anomaly scan as they have to be done before 22 and a half weeks. I know I'm lucky to be getting extra scans but thats so they can monitor the baby so I don't really understand the sentiment.

I've got a massive headache and I feel like !!!!!!. I know it might seem pathetic crying over stupid stuff like this but one of the whole reasons we transferred to Leeds hospital instead of Ripon was because of the shocking treatment the midwife in Ripon gave me even cancelling my 12 week scan 3 times and not turning up to my booking in appointment for over an hour so it just feels like history repeating itself now.

Sorry x

fluffnutter

ikkle87 wrote: »

Then the hospital rang to say they've filled in a scan request card but because I'm having a growth scan at 28 weeks other people who aren't will get priority over me and as there is only cancellation slots left I should be aware that I might not get an anomaly scan as they have to be done before 22 and a half weeks. I know I'm lucky to be getting extra scans but thats so they can monitor the baby so I don't really understand the sentiment.

This is bullshit. An anomaly scan is part of the current NHS antenatal care package and you have every right to one. You don't get bumped off the list just because you also need a later scan for a very different reason.

Wait until you're feeling less tearful and your headache's better, then try marshalling a bit of support and taking this further. Speak to your midwife (and perhaps your GP?), and get back to the hospital with a calm approach whilst making it clear that you expect to be scheduled for your routine 20 week scan. Make it non-negotiable. Don't start thinking you should be grateful about the extra scans - they're to make sure your baby's OK, they're not a freebie because the NHS is feeling a bit generous !!!!!!! Get the care you're entitled to by demanding it.

This is unlike me (I'm not usually into 'demanding' anything). But frankly, this is the biggest bull I've heard for a long while.

Sa-ra-ra-ra

fluffnutter wrote: »

This is bullshit. An anomaly scan is part of the current NHS antenatal care package and you have every right to one. You don't get bumped off the list just because you also need a later scan for a very different reason.

Seconded. You've been asked to go for the additional scans because you're considered to be a high risk pregnancy, not because they have decided it would be nice to let you see your baby more. Your consultant has made that decision, and it should be made perfectly clear to the uppity receptionist or booking clerk that it's not their call to make.

*goes back to lurking*

ETA: To be honest, hospitals are so poor at paperwork if you call back in 24 hours and tell them that you've been told by your midwife to call them and book your 20 week scan as you've not heard anyhing yet, I bet they wouldn't bat an eyelid...

Miss_Money

Littlemissmoneysaver- i got it from shop mobility. they were fab. you pay a donation, but they ask you to do this whilst not in the room with you into a tin, so basically if you are having financial difficulties you don't feel under pressure to put in lots (or anything at all) you give them your name and phone number and then they give you the wheelchair. you just ring them at the start of every month to say you still need the chair for x amount of weeks. Its been invaluable!

ikkle87

fluffnutter wrote: »

This is bullshit. An anomaly scan is part of the current NHS antenatal care package and you have every right to one. You don't get bumped off the list just because you also need a later scan for a very different reason.

Wait until you're feeling less tearful and your headache's better, then try marshalling a bit of support and taking this further. Speak to your midwife (and perhaps your GP?), and get back to the hospital with a calm approach whilst making it clear that you expect to be scheduled for your routine 20 week scan. Make it non-negotiable. Don't start thinking you should be grateful about the extra scans - they're to make sure your baby's OK, they're not a freebie because the NHS is feeling a bit generous !!!!!!! Get the care you're entitled to by demanding it.

This is unlike me (I'm not usually into 'demanding' anything). But frankly, this is the biggest bull I've heard for a long while.

Thanks hun I just couldn't help welling up when she said that, she said 'it's no real hardship because you've got your 28 week scan' if my OH had been here he would have spoke to them for me and stayed calm, I'm just emotional and watching soppy films before phone calls like that didn't help. I thought everyone got the 20 weeks scan too because of the certain checks they do on the heart etc. This is my first pregnancy (the last one I miscarried) so I'm new to it all and maybe a bit naive and accept what they say. It was a different woman than the woman I saw yesterday who booked my 28 week scan, she was lovely. I'm back at the hospital for my GTT tomorrow so I will go up and see them in person. It confused me massively because I would have thought wanting to do growth scans etc would mean the 20 week scan was even more important to check things.