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Atheist and the nativity

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  • MandM90
    MandM90 Posts: 2,246 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    Person_one wrote: »
    I actually think its quite cruel what we put children though with Father Christmas. Its so engrained though its probably going nowhere in the foreseeable future.

    Before I had DD I felt the same, but seeing her excitement and happiness I can't help feel a little Utilitarian about it and believe the eventual pain will be massively outweighed by the years of magic. My partner and I did have the brief discussion about it and conceded that there was no way you could bring up a child to be the only one who isn't visited by Father Christmas.
  • daska
    daska Posts: 6,212 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture Combo Breaker
    I have a very blunt view on Father Christmas/Santa/Pere Noel etc. If you don't believe then he doesn't exist, if he doesn't exist he can't visit... It's worked well so far LOL.
    Eat food. Not too much. Mostly plants - Michael Pollan
    48 down, 22 to go
    Low carb, low oxalate Primal + dairy
    From size 24 to 16 and now stuck...
  • peachyprice
    peachyprice Posts: 22,346 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper
    Soubrette wrote: »
    the religious don't seem to murder any the less than the unreligious when taken as a group so religion per se cannot be the evil force that some seem to feel it is.

    Actually, I have to disagree with this entirely.

    A large majority of mass murders be it the pogroms, Nazi Germany, Poland, Turkey, 911, Anders Behring, etc, etc all were carried out in the name of religion.
    Accept your past without regret, handle your present with confidence and face your future without fear
  • JC9297
    JC9297 Posts: 817 Forumite
    Soubrette wrote: »
    I love this idea - at one point in her life my daughter was puzzled by the tooth fairy, there was evidence for it - money left under pillows and the confirmation that this happened to more than one child, how could she prove or disprove the existence of the tooth fairy. It led to a very interesting week of discussion and also brought in things like occams razor.

    I was remarking to my 14 year old today about his pointing out at the age of 5 that Father Christmas couldn't be real because it would be impossible for him to go to everybody in the world in one day. He reminded me that he proved his theory about the tooth fairy by putting his tooth under his pillow without telling us, it had come out when he was in bed.
  • rh1_3
    rh1_3 Posts: 38 Forumite
    OMG (gosh) why do we all take life so seriously.

    There is nothing worse for a child at school than being the poor little sod who has twerps for parents who insist on their view being forced upon their unfortunate offspring.

    Conforming may feel like a strain but by hec it makes their life so much easier.

    I don't believe in a God. My wife does and our children understand that we have different views. In the same way I don't like Celery but the kids love it.

    My father hated football so never kicked a ball about with me. Guess who was the last one to be picked week in week out at games. How great did that make me feel. My little lad adores the game and at 4 takes every opportunity to play. So I guess I need to understand the offside rule.
  • Perhaps "anti-religion" would be a better term. It seems that the OP is actively trying to avoid any contact with religion for their child. As if it might contaminate them or something. It's not very open-minded, and I am only thinking that if the child chooses to be religious (or be interested in it) then they will be appalled.
    .


    Not actively avoiding- it just never comes up in daily life. It is something I do not force onto my child, along with other things I believe (I don't eat meat, she does) but it was just a surprise that it seems to have featured highly in school. And I know that her little classmates are Muslims, Hindus and Catholic so featuring one religion seems strange.

    I am happy to expose her to it- just do not want it to be forced on her as it was for us as children. We were dropped at church, while our parents went off and did other things.....
  • liney
    liney Posts: 5,121 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    MandM90 wrote: »
    Just because an idea is comforting doesn't mean there is any truth in it. We were 100% honest with DD when both of her pets died and she takes a very matter of fact attitude to death. Perhaps if we lived in a society where we weren't scared to talk about it/face it and recognised it as a necessary and integral part of life we wouldn't have so much need for fairy stories!

    But then you are assuming that heaven is a fairy story, and pushing your belief onto your child.

    If she chose to believe in heaven, because a relative, or school had spoken about it, would you be telling her she was wrong?

    Personally, I am a non believer, but I think pushing a lack of belief is as bad as pushing religion.
    "On behalf of teachers, I'd like to dedicate this award to Michael Gove and I mean dedicate in the Anglo Saxon sense which means insert roughly into the anus of." My hero, Mr Steer.
  • chewynut
    chewynut Posts: 374 Forumite
    I wouldn't be too concerned about it. I was completely athiest as a child. I've never believed in anything but science. It was only when I was a teenager that I realised my primary school was fairly religious. All the songs we sang in assembly were religious, we did the nativity every year, etc. Not a single bit of it registered with me.
    'til the end of the line
  • peachyprice
    peachyprice Posts: 22,346 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper
    And I know that her little classmates are Muslims, Hindus and Catholic so featuring one religion seems strange.

    I doubt they do feature just one religion, it's that it just happens to be christmastime and the nativity is a seasonal play. They probably did something at diwali and eid, those occasions just don't have a play attached for the children to act out.

    My DD at both her infant and junior schools have had their nativity and carol services in the local churches, it's great to see the jewish, hindu, muslim and atheist families joining in and really enjoying the occasion along with the christians.
    Accept your past without regret, handle your present with confidence and face your future without fear
  • wow I had not thought my request would open such impassioned responses.

    I believe that forcing a religion on a child is not the way to go- you basically make them behave from fear. I would rather my child behaved well because it feels better (or makes mummy/daddy happier) than to please some floaty being.

    I have just read the God Delusion, which makes me question more why some people believe so strongly and I believe so strongly that there is no god being.

    I do not plan to avoid religion with her, but I do not want her to think all these stories are true and that these stories should form the basis of her life. (OK she is only little at the moment and will not understand such concepts, but I am thinking about when the questions do arise).

    Christmas is about a time of giving, thinking of others, spending time together and not about religion for our family.
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