The New Me And Our Quest To Become Debt Free And Have Self Belief

moonlightpjs

LookingAhead wrote:

Weller if it makes you feel any better.....I felt like a complete an utter rubbish human being yesterday and thought my BF would be better off without me.

Why?

Because I had promised myself I would go out Friday night, not have a lot to drink, come home quite early and then get up quite early on Saturday and make the most of the day with him.

In reality I came home at 2.30am, shabbily drunk......waking up at 9.00am only to take 2 paracetamol, go back to sleep till 11.00am, crawl out of bed & put PJs on, have a cup of tea and curl up on the sofa cursing the evils of alcohol. I didn't get showered till 1.30pm!

I felt like a complete failure and a rubbish human being.

What do you think?

I think thats normal LA :rotfl: - just what I used to do before I had children!!!
You're not a failure or a rubbish human being - you just had a good time lol (I hope you did anyway).

halloweenqueen_2

You have a wonderful son and you are to blame for that!
Good luck, I hope all goes well for you.

Dragon_Lady_3

What a wonderful, thoughtful, loving little boy you have bought up. I think lots of HUGS and KISSES are called for. And they are FREE !!!!!

painted_lady

You sound like an absolutely fantastic mum and must be so proud of your little boy.

southernscouser

Bloody hell woman! You've made me well up with that one!

How can you say you've failed your kids?

You have got one hell of a little lad there. Don't you dare change the way you are as a family because this world needs more people like your son!

moonlightpjs

Now I'm welling up again as SS has said something nice and not something sexy:rotfl:
The support keeps on coming and I don't deserve it, just can't thank you all enough, if I wasn't a DFW I'd buy you all a pint of Tetleys.

Just can't help feeling I've let my kids down, if we hadn't got into so much debt we could afford for Samuel to have all the things he wants, even though I know he just wants to be loved. I know we couldn't help hubby being in and out of hospital for a year but that doesn't justify £36k of debt.

Samuels love is unconditional and I let him down by crying and getting worked up and I told my Mum today what he said (she doesn't know about debt - just that we are struggling) and she said that sometimes she thinks he'd be better off with her as I am so depressed etc and she thinks I don't love him enough - and I didn't think I could love anybody more than I love my children and hubby. Samuel told me that he doesn't really want to live with Grandma and Pa as Grandma never tells him off even when he is naughty and she always wants cuddles and won't let him play and she always wants him to tell her that he loves her more than me - mind games and its not fair - hes only 7 and a very young 7 at that and wants to please everyone but she shouldn't be saying things like that to him.

My whole aim in life was to get married, have children and be happy and my family make me happy, just this debt thingy hanging over our heads. i know I should be glad that hubby is back at work and working all hours to pay our debts but I feel so lonely and when my Mum comes she just gets at me and says I don't do right by my children so then I don't want her to come and end up feeling lonely again.

She even said last week that Social Services would take my kids from me if i didn't get my depression sorted out - I wish I could sort it out but my kids feel loved, really loved and know that that love comes without any conditions. They are healthy, clean, well fed, very much loved and looked after - they are my world. She even said Andy (hubby) would leave me and when I phoned him and asked him he said she was ****ing stupid and didn't have a clue and told me I had to tell her to get out of the house.
He doesn;t mince his words.

Anyway - rambling again- i'll shut up now - I know this isn't the place to tell all my troubles and fears -we're supposed to be helping each other get out of debt and save, not have a moan - so i'll go now and leave you all in peace.

spud30

weller711 wrote:

Now I'm welling up again as SS has said something nice and not something sexy:rotfl:

SS often comes out with the nicest things.....he's very misunderstood, poor thing :rotfl:

I think you're doing a fantastic job with Samuel. He sounds like a lovely little boy hun.

Your mum , on the other hand :mad: Nuff said !!!!!!

southernscouser

weller711 wrote:

Just can't help feeling I've let my kids down, if we hadn't got into so much debt we could afford for Samuel to have all the things he wants, even though I know he just wants to be loved.

Not read the rest of your post yet but if you did buy him everything he wanted he would lose sight of what matters, clearly his family which even at his age he knows, and he'd turn into one of those !!!!!! kids! :eek:

And I can do sexy if you want? :cool:

southernscouser

Tell your mum to go **** herself.

spud30

weller711 wrote:

Anyway - rambling again- i'll shut up now - I know this isn't the place to tell all my troubles and fears -we're supposed to be helping each other get out of debt and save, not have a moan - so i'll go now and leave you all in peace.

Don't you dare go anywhere !!!

We're just one big family on here. You can have a ramble and a moan to us any time you like.

Dare I say it, Andy's got it right about your mum