you know when all you lovely people give advice...

lynsayjane

pap, since you dared me I came over for a nosey! i've only read the past couple of pages but big hugs for you! well done on having your epiphany today, I had one yesterday (check out MY diary if you dare!) too and it's very envigorating!

I love living by myself. I moved out at 17 and have never looked back and I had a much happier home life than you seem to, only problem was not getting on well with my sister. I kinda fell into my own place, I was originally at student halls then tried to rent, I could barely afford box rooms (you thought your second one was small HA!), Aberdeen rent is horrendous! I can't even remember who suggested buying but all I did was pay one visit to the bank, visit a couple of flats then a few months later I had the keys and mortgage. I was so lucky, the flat is much larger than I was looking at (though only one bed) and the mortgage cost less than half what I was looking at rented pads for! I'm sorry it's not going to be as easy for you, but you will get there and you'll feel all the stronger for the fight.

Remember, what doesn't kill us makes us stronger. Living with your family, however unpleasent, will stand you in good stead for coping withthe big bad world.

As for college I'm sorry to have to say it but if the driving lessons are to stay then I think this will need to be put on hold. I know it sucks and it's what you wanted to do, but if getting out of your mum's house means so much to you then it needs to be done, at least for now.

Right i'll go before i hog the whole thread! :rotfl: btw the second flat has such a nice kitchen and garden! didn't see the first one though.

kathfisch

postingalwaysposting wrote: »

thanks tes, you and kath* have been so much help to me over the past months, i need to live my life how i see fit, not how others think i should, today i have decided something i never thought i could, i have wanted to see this day from when i started at makro sadly due to my debt and the family i couldnt do this... today is the first day of my life, thanks for all your support and encouragemnet i will pay you back some day, you are worth your weight in gold

We've only given you the nudge you needed and a little bit of support, you are the one who's doing all this!!

I think your new plans are great, just the motivation and goal you need. I think the driving lessons are not essential but, like you say, you don't want your family to start asking questions. As for college, I think that's a really important goal to hang onto. Even if you can't manage it this year (which I think you probably could) its something to aim for and is crucial to the next improvements in your life (i.e. getting a better and more enjoyable job).

Kath x

CAFCGirl

PAP,

You're doing fantastically hun. If you want any advice or just comments about moving out at a young age send me a PM and I can fill you in on my sorry tale! I moved out when I was 19 to a city nearly an hours drive from where I'd grown up and I dont regret it. I regret some smaller decisions but I really think it would help you grow as a person and I think you'd achieve so much more besides....

And if you really really want to get away you could always move into this

http://www.rightmove.co.uk/viewdetails-14790734.rsp?pa_n=14&tr_t=rent

I know someone whose looking for a room-mate

:T

postingalwaysposting

thanks kath, yes i have done this but i couldnt have done it with all of your help and support :T i havent dropped college hence why i am looking at september i will prob still go i will just have to look at my finances again when the prospectus arrives :rolleyes:

CAFCGirl thats why i want to move out to grow up, ok i have done some of it here but i am 22 this year... and did you hear the news yesterday? more and more 'adults' are staying at home, into there 30's :eek: that will not be me :rotfl: i think i need to face the world now oh and yes please pm me your story i would love to hear it

£300.00 has gone onto my card, only £95 to go :T i have also started my moving out fund (see sig) i am putting into my empty isa then i can see it mounting up each time i log onto my bank account :rotfl: holiday soon, two working days left

JAMIEDODGER

PAP

you are doing really well hun
keep up the good work:D

JD

RAS

PAP

read your posts a few weeks ago and was really impressed with how you were coping in such difficult circumstances.

Anyway, I remembered an organisation that my sister used when she needed to get away for a bit. You want your own flat but if things get more difficult, this might be a parachute option.

CSV offer full time paid volunteer placements. You would receive a weekly allowance of £31.00 together with free accommodation and food, for 40 hours a week. Not a lot but given your skill living on not a lot, might be OK. You could move right away from Bristol, perhaps helping a disabled student live independently at university. It could even be fun:rotfl:

Also you said you might be interested in working with elderly people somewhere? And that you desparately want to get your Maths GCSE? Why Maths? Does that mean that you have already got GCSEs in other subjects? Being noisy I know, but I do have some knowledge in this area, if you are prepared to post, or PM.

Notice you are working late. Hope you are not too tired when you get back. I am going to be off-line for a couple of days.

RAS

Dozy B..

Helps if I put up the link

http://www.csv.org.uk/Volunteer/Full-time/Full-time+Volunteering.htm

lynzpower

CSV is a great idea! I do remember PAP some time ago saying that she was interested in a career in social care- are you still thinking of this PAP?

PAP also sent you a PM, with something in you might be interested in x

postingalwaysposting

hi RAS ~ thanks for that info i will definatly look into that, having a bad time at work lately... yep i would love to work with eldrly people, thats my dream, i just think the older generation are so understanding/caring and loveing and i want to help in there latter life. ros i want gcse maths becasue i was awarded d in gcse when i first took them, i have 8 others:

Humanities - A
Resistant Materials (Half Course) - A
Office Applications - B
English Language - C
English Literature - C
Double Award Science - CC
Food Technology (Half Course) - C
Maths - D
French - D

the maths has been a struggle for me since i was in year 6, but to cover it up i would copy others or pull a sickie in class, so when i asked for help i never got it, my coursework was 1 page long as no one would help, this has been a struggle or my life i just want to prove to myself that i can do it

lynzpower thanks for the pm :A

another day in the life of pap, i have finally put in a complaint about one of my colleuges today and i wasnt the only one so because of the amount of people complaining its gone straight to management :eek: anyways i hope its dealt with before i come back from holiday Overtime tommorow, wish i hadnt said i would do it now but we live and learn... and then off on holiday monday



i have a question for you all though, mum wants to borrow £50 for the holiday (as sepending and such) should i give it to here, i will get it back the thursday after (once she is payed) i have told her i have to look at my finances and get back to her prob sat/sun, but really i wanted to ask all of you your opinions... what should i do?

have a nice evening

beanielou

Hi pap
Hate to be blunt but in a word no I would not lend your mum any money.She knew this holiday was coming up & had had a chance to save up a wee bit herself if she wanted to.
Have a great holiday.