you know when all you lovely people give advice...

tesuhoha

Keep your bills, savings and spending amount separate then it will be easier to work out.

tesuhoha

I dont mean to make you feel bad Pap and youre not letting anyone down whatever you decide to do. Youre not far off being a magician the way you have to juggle your money all ways! However, I think that youve got to compartmentalise your money more. Separate it and then you will be able to see where you are better.

postingalwaysposting

tesuhoha wrote: »

Right firstly Im going to have a chat with her when she comes home. She sent me a text saying she was trying to have fun and could we sort this out later. So with that attitude I am going to cancel the dd immediately. I will then offer her a certain small amount each month towards the bill and will discuss the options regarding her phone with her. I will even go to the 02 shop with her to give support but thats where it ends.

As to you Pap I think you need to treat your savings like debts in a way. The long term savings account you could set up a regular dd and then just pretend that its a loan you are paying and you cant touch it. If you have £280 a month to spare for saving then maybe you should save £100 in the long term savings and £180 in the other.

As for booking the holiday for next May well you could leave it a lot longer and save for it before booking. There are lots of good last minute deals. Where are you going? Speak to your mum and say you want to save for it and ask her for a regular amount each month towards it. Tell her youre not getting into debt over a holiday. As for the giving her money youve got to give yourself a slap on the wrist Pap, (literally speaking) and remember that youre not well off. Im a bit of a hypocrite saying this I know but she is the adult here.

Your finances are becoming complicated as you want to do so many things at once. I think you need to print out your spreadsheet and have a look at it in front of you and decide your priorities. Some things may need to be kept on hold till you can afford them. That £400 you have saved will go in a flash if you're not careful. Sorry to nag but dont want to see you back in debt. Please save for the holiday first though before booking. Its not necessary now to book and get some money from your mum towards it. Why should you pay for it all.

awww glad you will sort it with yoru daughter, you need to rain her in now as otherwise she wont help with yoru debt repayment either. Please can you update us with how it went etc, as i would be glad to hear it

as for me no you arnt nagging, you are just telling it how it is, i just wish it was more readily avalible :rotfl:yes i am trying to do too much i agree, i want to go to college, i want to buy a car, i want to go on holiday as well as pleasing everyone else... its not going to work. In all honestly i dont want to go on holiday, mum wants to take me... but i have to book it (£200) and then we will all pay monthly. However i cant really leave it to a late deal as the place we have picked only has one sole occupancy room left (for me) technically it should have been booked months ago...

well i have added everything up and it looks like scary reading... from the £900 i had a week ago in my current account from my savings after all whats payed/done that needs to be done before the 15th i will have £481.28 ready to save... this has to include my xmas savings of £140 too :wall: i guess i have had another

still dont know what i am doing about the holiday/furniture thing and to be honest i dont know anything anymore...

ZTD

tesuhoha wrote: »

Right firstly Im going to have a chat with her when she comes home. She sent me a text saying she was trying to have fun and could we sort this out later. So with that attitude I am going to cancel the dd immediately. I will then offer her a certain small amount each month towards the bill and will discuss the options regarding her phone with her. I will even go to the 02 shop with her to give support but thats where it ends.

And IMHO, that's exactly the right attitude. You can't protect people from themselves. If you try they end up worse off. There's actually a whole field of study about it - believe it or not...

postingalwaysposting

tesuhoha wrote: »

I dont mean to make you feel bad Pap and youre not letting anyone down whatever you decide to do. Youre not far off being a magician the way you have to juggle your money all ways! However, I think that youve got to compartmentalise your money more. Separate it and then you will be able to see where you are better.

thanks tes, your not making me feel bad, i guess i am doing that myself the problem is i go months fine then i hit a dead end and i just want to give up, no matter what i try/do somethings wrong or i use my money wrong and then i am back to square one i do have different accounts for things

bills ~ £336.78 ~ bills account
savings ~ £280.00 ~ savings accounts
spends ~ £153.22 ~ spending accounts

but it still wont work... i need someone to take over all my money and only give me set accounts and lock everything away :rotfl:

Gemmzie

tesuhoha wrote: »

All I can do is cancel my direct debit.

If you cancel the DD and the contract is still running they will default her.

If she wants to keep the contract or if it's still inside the contracted time, she'll have to pay it out of her own account

tesuhoha

Pap, I know you want to do so much but the important thing here is to stay calm and think logically, then you can have as much as possible.

1) College - this is already paid for
2) Car - Keep saving a regular amount and you will get there eventually.
3) Driving test - you must see this one through if you want the car.
4) Furniture - you have already budgetted for this and it is something you want.
4) Save what you can afford and then forget about it. Dont save money you think you will want to withdraw.
5) Holiday - think - look at your options - do you really have to go to that one place or are there alternatives? Could your mother book it on her cc and then you could pay her back instead? Much better not to be the one who is owed the money. How about one of the cheap Sun holidays? Are they still available? I'm just frightened that you'll pay £200 and then they wont pay you back.
6) Vow not to make any more promises to family involving money.
7) Long term savings - perhaps just start off with £50 a month till you can afford more.

Gemmzie

Who's your current account with?

I had a similar problem and found savings 'jars' every useful. Even bills is a jar and then I made all my DD's the same date, and there's a SO from the bill jar to my current account for that same day.

Also, for spending, why not use an Egg Money card? It's got cash back and 4.22% APR when in credit, so if you don't spend then you get interest

tesuhoha

Gemmzie wrote: »

If you cancel the DD and the contract is still running they will default her.

If she wants to keep the contract or if it's still inside the contracted time, she'll have to pay it out of her own account

Im going to cancel the DD and then talk to her about either taking over the contract or trying to go PAYG. Im also going to give her some money each month towards paying for her phone as she's in a bad financial situation at the moment. Next year when she leaves uni then everything stops.

tesuhoha

postingalwaysposting wrote: »

thanks tes, your not making me feel bad, i guess i am doing that myself the problem is i go months fine then i hit a dead end and i just want to give up, no matter what i try/do somethings wrong or i use my money wrong and then i am back to square one i do have different accounts for things

bills ~ £336.78 ~ bills account
savings ~ £280.00 ~ savings accounts
spends ~ £153.22 ~ spending accounts

but it still wont work... i need someone to take over all my money and only give me set accounts and lock everything away :rotfl:

Therefore to book that holiday you would have to take money out of your savings and as they currently stand at £486 then you would have £286 left.:eek: Also you have to pay for your driving lessons and the extra for your furniture. You cant afford to book that holiday right now Pap. You need to save for it. Think - even if its a bargain price, a bargain is not a bargain if you havent got the money.