Boarding the Bus of Positivity (for 24 months of travels!)

debtfreesomeday

Sorry to hear you've had a tiring week too WABL, it really is draining isn't it.

Our day got worse not long after my last post. Ds has thrown up violently twice since then. He's asleep now but not sure if it's going to be a very good night. Poor little thing, he was so upset earlier. :0(

Chocforever

I hope DS is feeling better now. You have had a very difficult start to the year to say the least. I really feel for you dealing with your family's health issues and the tiredness of looking after a one year old on your own. I can't imagine what it is like. I know you love DS to bits and I don't want to suggest otherwise.

I wish there was a way in which we could take some of the pressure off you. If there is, do send me a PM.

debtfreesomeday

Thank you chocs, you really are an angel. We haven't had a great year so far, but are much luckier than some so have to think positive I guess. I do try to be positive as I know it helps, but I don't find it easy.
Ds hasn't been sick for 36 hours or so now but us not eating much so we're keeping a close eye on him. He didn't go to nursery yesterday, thought it was best to keep him home.

I'm doing ok on eBay, £70 made so far with 2 or 3 days to go. I have turned out a few more items for the next batch too. I am also bidding on a car travel toy for Ds as he gets so bored and fussy in the car. I don't fancy paying the. New price of £30 though so eBay it is! Failing that, I'll have to think of something else.

The bank account is doing ok, still a bit of money in there!

I have been doing a lot of thinking this weekend about work and our finances. I have to decide whether I want to return to work full time in October or whether my role will become part time permanently. I have worked out that we will only be about £160-£200 a month better off if I return full time, but, once the loan is paid off and Ds is out of payable childcare and at school it means we could save some serious money every month and possibly be able to achieve the dream of moving area and having the village life we want.
The BIG negative is that Ds would have to be in nursery 5 days a week at 19 months old. You read so many articles saying how this can affect children negatively and such, I just feel like we'd never see him. I do also hate my job, but it is relatively well paid.

Someone please just tell me what to do, i just don't know!

debtfreesomeday

Oh, and as redundancy is quite a real possibility, working part time would leave me with very little redundancy payment. Argh! Wish I had a crystal ball!

wantabetterlife

Oh DFSD thats a difficult one...i am in a similar situation myself. I work 4 days a week at the minute and am going back to work full time in April. The difference is we are going to be trying for another baby in the next 6 months and i really dont want to loose a lot of maternity pay. I can cope with going back full time if i know its only for a short time IYSWIM. How many days a week do you work at the minute? To be honest you are not going to be that much better off, i find that when you are working full time you meal plan less and buy far more convenience food and in reality you end up spending more so that you can cope with everything else. What does your hubby think you should do?

Chocforever

I read you first post and my initial thought was, what if you were made redundant, which I see was in post 2!

Some other thoughts. If going full time is the way in which you could secure the future life you would like, I would go for it. I know there will be people thinking that the right thing to do is to live for the moment, but if you know what you want and it isn't achievable with your current circumstances, I think it is worth going full time for, say, 5 to 7 years. If even mentioning that sort of time frame fills you with horror, then I guess you know that going back full time isn't right for you and DS.

I expect you know all this, but recently I heard some friends saying that when their child is 3, they get some kind of childcare vouchers which mean that using their normal school based nursery, they get a few sessions a week paid for which signficantly reduced their childcare costs.

Is your work flexible about holidays? Could you buy some extra holiday or go on a contract where you get more school holidays off (even before DS is at school)?

You said that it is very expensive to buy a house in your ideal area. Is it also expensive to rent there? I am just wondering if there is some way you could move a bit sooner. I know your parents own your house and you have put time and money into improving it, but they must realise you are unhappy there.

Don't feel you have to write a reply to the above. At least it sounds like you have some time to make your decision about going full time at work.

I know what you mean about people being worse off. When I am feeling low, I start watching TV programmes where people are having a really hard time to make me put my circumstances in context. I have been known to watch shows like Eastenders to cheer myself up!

debtfreesomeday

Ha! Eastenders to cheer yourself up, I might try it!

Thanks for your opinions both, I do value them and appreciate your thoughts.
It's true, I won't be earning a significant amount more by going back full time whilst we're paying childcare, but once Ds is at school we will have about £1500 more a month with no loan or childcare to pay and two full time wages. We could potentially save £1200 a month and realise our dream sooner rather than later or not at all. If I stay part time we will have £850 a month more than present, so quite a difference.

I work 2.5 days a week presently WABL, they have employed someone temporarily to do the other 2.5 of my job. Hubby is more than happy for me to decide what to do, but we are both worried about Ds being in nursery full time. However, he is saying that the money will be great once we're finished paying for everything else and may mean we'll be able to have more of the life we want.
We're in a similar position too WABL as, if we are to have any more children (which with the lack of sleep at the moment, i'm not so sure!) then part time maternity pay would be unaffordable.

Yes chocs, I vaguely know about the childcare voucher/ free hours thing at 3 years but not entirely sure how it works yet. I'm sure it'll save us some money though.

Urgh, it's such a difficult decision.

Onto the here and now and we've had another awful weekend. Ds and hubby have both been really sick with a bug, just waiting for me to get it now... Ds is really not right and I'm quite concerned about him. There is a chance we could be seeing his paediatrician tomorrow as they cancelled our appointment but were going to try and fit us in if they could (long and boring story), but at least I'll be able to get him checked out if we do see him. I really hope so. It got so bad last night that I actually slept on the floor next to his cot (in the box room that is his nursery!) as I was so concerned about him choking in his sleep. He is also not eating now either.

In terms of money-making, eBay bids are now up to £101 which is great with 2 days to go.

Will update more tomorrow, lots more to say but just too tired tonight.

Dfsd
X

debtfreesomeday

You're never going to believe how much we made on eBay.... £278!!! I'm in shock!

wantabetterlife

OMG that is amazing DFSD...will definately ease the pressure a bit. Well done :j:j

debtfreesomeday

Unfortunately it'll all be going towards paying off the credit card, but at least it'll reduce the balance by a nice sum.
I have also made £103.50 by trading in a mobile phone we got recently with a new contract. It's a nice fancy phone but I'll make do with the basic one I have as we need the cash more than the posh phone.
Combined with our usual £100 monthly payment towards the cc and the council tax this month of £118 as no council tax this month, we will be reducing the card by over £500 this month. That's brilliant, but it would be so much nicer when we can shove Money like that into savings instead!

I already have about 10 more items for eBay, I'll try and get them listed this weekend.