Help please!

bobajob_1966

woodbine wrote: »

you make it sound soooooo easy,but you omit the need for a car/van and the hassle of becoming self employed

My parents have had the same window cleaner for thirty years - he has never had a vehicle. Registering as self employed is not difficult at all (easier than applying for JSA hardship payments), and accounting for many window cleaners amounts to little more than a small notebook!

Oldernotwiser

Sarah69 wrote: »

Thank you for your advice but I dont need lecturing on how to interact with my son. I am not dumb I know that benefits are funded part by tax payers. Of course my main worry is money because I cant afford it due to being on a tight budget as it is. Nobody can live without money.

Which part isn't?

seven-day-weekend

woodbine wrote: »

you make it sound soooooo easy,but you omit the need for a car/van and the hassle of becoming self employed

It is not a hassle to becomer self-employed; just inform the Tax people.

Oldernotwiser

bestpud wrote: »

Sounds like he's a but too keen on making excuses anyway! One day off with a chest infection...? Yeah, right!

Seriously, don't encourage his lazy attitude. He will hopefully thank you for taking the tough line one day.

Considering the son's been doing the job for less than 6 months (during which he's had "various times off sick") and normally works less than 16 hours a week it sounds like there's been a fair amount of encouragement already!

bestpud

Oldernotwiser wrote: »

Considering the son's been doing the job for less than 6 months (during which he's had "various times off sick") and normally works less than 16 hours a week it sounds like there's been a fair amount of encouragement already!

This is why I don't agree with parents who think it wrong to ask for 'keep' from children/adults once they leave full time education!

What incentive is there to work when parents allow them to lounge around for nothing, or in many cases, pay them to lie on their lazy butts?

They think they're fulfilling their 'parental duty' when in fact, they are taking the easy option but doing the child no favours!

Crazy!

Sarah69

Yes my son paid me money from his wages even if he only worked 1 day a week.

Yes it was above board he payed NI but not tax yet.

No he hasn't rung to apologise and I'm afraid I wouldn't expect him to, he stands up for himself just because he was employed by someone doesn't mean his boss can speak to him anyway he likes. His boss has made many digs in the past about him being off work ill, if your Ill your ill.

So you wouldn't go to work with a chest infection that's fine, my son didn't after coughing all night Monday and all day Tuesday then coughing up blood, working out in the cold all day is not going to make him better is it?

My son is not disabled.

I've read many posts on this forum with people asking for help and it seems the current trend is to reply with nasty comments or lectures, never really answering the question involved. I do not understand this at all. If you don't know the answer or can't help in anyway then don't reply!

I am on ESA, off sick from work since March 2010. This is not how I want to live my life, it has created debt which I have had to get a DRO for. I am in chronic pain 24/7 with no diagnosis as yet. My day consists of watching tv all day long. I do not know why people want to cheat the system to stay at home like this.

Nobody can live for nothing so if he is unable to get jsa there must be something else he can claim. If he wasn't living at home what would he do? I barely get by myself week to week having to live off a pittance. Obviously I would be better of working but just can't at the moment.

So if you hate people on benefit and cannot reply in a civil none sarcastic way the really don't bother. Thanks!

bestpud

Sarah69 wrote: »

Yes my son paid me money from his wages even if he only worked 1 day a week.

Yes it was above board he payed NI but not tax yet.

No he hasn't rung to apologise and I'm afraid I wouldn't expect him to, he stands up for himself just because he was employed by someone doesn't mean his boss can speak to him anyway he likes. His boss has made many digs in the past about him being off work ill, if your Ill your ill.

So you wouldn't go to work with a chest infection that's fine, my son didn't after coughing all night Monday and all day Tuesday then coughing up blood, working out in the cold all day is not going to make him better is it?

My son is not disabled.

I've read many posts on this forum with people asking for help and it seems the current trend is to reply with nasty comments or lectures, never really answering the question involved. I do not understand this at all. If you don't know the answer or can't help in anyway then don't reply!

I am on ESA, off sick from work since March 2010. This is not how I want to live my life, it has created debt which I have had to get a DRO for. I am in chronic pain 24/7 with no diagnosis as yet. My day consists of watching tv all day long. I do not know why people want to cheat the system to stay at home like this.

Nobody can live for nothing so if he is unable to get jsa there must be something else he can claim. If he wasn't living at home what would he do? I barely get by myself week to week having to live off a pittance. Obviously I would be better of working but just can't at the moment.

So if you hate people on benefit and cannot reply in a civil none sarcastic way the really don't bother. Thanks!

He wasn't paying you regularly so you won't miss that money.

If he lived alone he'd be able to apply for housing and council tax benefit, but other than that, he'd be on his own unless he managed to get a hardship payment.

It's meant as an incentive to stay in work, so of course it's going to be tough!

Make sure he gets off his rear and seeks work. Don't fall for the 'it is all online and there is no jobs' line!

There is fewer jobs than there were, so he needs to get himself out there.

What have his other illnesses been, out of interest?

DuckEggGingham

We all have our principles when dealing with bosses/work mates but principles do not pay the bills. Is he at least looking for another job or using this time to work out what he can claim? I know you are worried but the best/kindest thing you could do for him is tell him that needs to apologise and see if he can get his job back, he could always look for work whilst in work. I personally hope he is sanctioned and gets no money for telling his boss to "shove it".... I am sure we have all had times when we would loved to of done that but common sense kicks in, hopefully this lesson will teach him some common sense!

Imagine all those out there working cr&ppy jobs, living the daily drudge so they can pay their bills but all of them wishing they could tell their boss to "shove it" but they don't. It hardly seems fair they have to now support your son because he did do just that. Imagine if everyone did just that?

I am not a "benefits knocker" I totally believe in them for the right reasons, I hate how some can fall through the safety net in this day and age. Your son though does not need a safety net, he needs a swift kick up the jacksie

ads2312

I don't think you can blame the kid, at least he's kind of trying to work. More that a lot of youngsters!
What other options does he have. Does he have any other skills or qualifications. What jobs are in the area ?
Joking aside, window cleaners mostly get their rounds but knocking on peoples doors. Get some leaflets printed. Find him a local route and send him out. It really is as simple as that. I have a couple of friends who started like that, they both do well now and have people working for them. Sorry can't help with what he can claim, best send him to the job centre for that.

Oldernotwiser

Sarah69 wrote: »

No he hasn't rung to apologise and I'm afraid I wouldn't expect him to, he stands up for himself just because he was employed by someone doesn't mean his boss can speak to him anyway he likes. His boss has made many digs in the past about him being off work ill, if your Ill your ill.

So you wouldn't go to work with a chest infection that's fine, my son didn't after coughing all night Monday and all day Tuesday then coughing up blood, working out in the cold all day is not going to make him better is it?

My son is not disabled.

Can you not understand that an employer would make comments to a non disabled lad of 19 who's had "various times" off ill over a 5 month period (in the summer), when only working a few hours a week?

I think that your own experience of ill health is colouring your attitude to your son's behaviour which is doing nothing to help him move towards a productive future.

This is not a normal way of leading your life at 19 and your attitude is doing nothing to help him, rather the opposite..