Boyfriend Possessed by Ghost?

*max*

Meritaten - the guy yelled at the Op's friend and threw her out in the middle of the night. Then went on to explain his behaviour by saying he is possessed by a ghost.

What more evidence do you need??? If the friend will not listen to advice and continue to see this person, there is nothing the OP can do about it. Orchestrating a "look" round of his house , aside from being incredibly sneaky and rude, would not achieve anything, except maybe make an already unstable person angry.

The OP cannot do anything to "protect" his friend except advise and let her know what he thinks of the guy. That is all. If she won't listen, that is a shame - but it's her life.

meritaten

ok - I cant help it if you all feel constrained by 'miss manners book of ettiquette'. but, if my friend was determined to 'see' this guy, then I wouldnt give a !!!!! about 'sneaking' around!
and - impromptu parties ARE common where I live. we often go back to friends houses for a takeaway - I dont see whats strange about that?
and if any female on here says that she doesnt take a look around while she is at a friends house - (I dont mean look in drawers or anything, but bathroom cabinets are fair game) then they are lying! we ALL do it!

suki1964

meritaten wrote: »

and if any female on here says that she doesnt take a look around while she is at a friends house - (I dont mean look in drawers or anything, but bathroom cabinets are fair game) then they are lying! we ALL do it!

So you are calling me a liar?

Not all of us have such bad manners to poke around in other peoples houses. Not even as a teenager and babysat have I snooped in other peoples houses

Does make me wonder what circles you move it though if everyone you know does it


Same as suggesting having a party at someone's else who the Op had never met and the Ops friend had only known for 2 weeks max. What really worries me is you thought both were women and that it was perfectly acceptable to suggest it

shegirl

meritaten wrote: »

ok - I cant help it if you all feel constrained by 'miss manners book of ettiquette'. but, if my friend was determined to 'see' this guy, then I wouldnt give a !!!!! about 'sneaking' around!
and - impromptu parties ARE common where I live. we often go back to friends houses for a takeaway - I dont see whats strange about that?
and if any female on here says that she doesnt take a look around while she is at a friends house - (I dont mean look in drawers or anything, but bathroom cabinets are fair game) then they are lying! we ALL do it!

I don't do it!

Tropez

meritaten wrote: »

ok - I cant help it if you all feel constrained by 'miss manners book of ettiquette'. but, if my friend was determined to 'see' this guy, then I wouldnt give a !!!!! about 'sneaking' around!
and - impromptu parties ARE common where I live. we often go back to friends houses for a takeaway - I dont see whats strange about that?
and if any female on here says that she doesnt take a look around while she is at a friends house - (I dont mean look in drawers or anything, but bathroom cabinets are fair game) then they are lying! we ALL do it!

Hmm, I must tell my partner that all her friends are now banned from my home.

I understand your thoughts on impromptu parties but I can't say I have ever suggested that myself and a bunch of my friends ever just go back to some guy or girl's house that we have only met. I also have to say if anyone tried that with me, they wouldn't be permitted. I don't just let anybody into my home and now with the revelation that apparently it is normal for women to poke around in my bathroom cabinets and what have you I might be even stricter about who comes in!

celyn90

I apparently did something similar to an ex of mine - gave him a bucket load of mega-offensive abuse in the middle of the night.

I was asleep. I have absolutely no recollection of it at all, but the relationship was never the same after that. I felt awful, but I really don't have any idea why it happened.

Mind you, I have also got up, got dressed, boarded a bus and woke up at my desk in the past. And made cookies whilst being asleep. Much better now I am older - tends only to be the odd bizzare conversation now

There could be a perfectly rational explanation.

The claiming to be possessed thing is a little more obscure, but I'd hear him out at least. Maybe he doesn't understand himself what happened.

cel x

Silk

cardboard_chewer wrote: »

My female friend met a man about 2 weeks ago. They were getting on fine, he was generous, funny, charming etc.
A week ago he invited her round to his house. They went out to the pub for a drink and then went back to his house.
What happened next is shocking, ......................

A week ago ...would make it Halloween :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

Gingham_R

meritaten wrote: »

and if any female on here says that she doesnt take a look around while she is at a friends house - (I dont mean look in drawers or anything, but bathroom cabinets are fair game) then they are lying! we ALL do it!

That's the kind of thing people say to justify their own shameful behaviour. Count me as one of the 'liars' if you must. I find that sort of thing deplorable.

As for the OP, stay well clear. You can support your friend by telling her to keep away from him and being there to pick up the pieces when it inevitably goes wrong. Getting entangled in meeting him helps no-one.

*max*

This alleged universal snooping around has made me think I should maybe leave a "surprise" in my cupboards, in case my more inquisitive friends want to partake in a bit of sneaky spying....Maybe a jar filled with soap shavings and a label that says " Toenail Clippings, 1997 - 2005". Or fill an entire shelf with severed Barbie doll heads.....Oh the possibilities!

MarilynMonroe_2

cardboard_chewer wrote: »

My female friend met a man about 2 weeks ago. They were getting on fine, he was generous, funny, charming etc.
A week ago he invited her round to his house. They went out to the pub for a drink and then went back to his house.
What happened next is shocking, in the early hours of the morning he told her to **** off and get out of his house (the actual language was worse than this but I'm sure you know what I mean).
At first she thought he was joking but then realised he was deadly serious. She grabbed her bag and ran out of the house in fright to her car. She drove home to her house which is about 1 hour away.
I know there are some bad people around but I was appalled he could behave like that and I thought she had a lucky escape.
A few days later he phoned her, not to apologise, but to explain what happened. He said he was possessed by a ghost and that was what caused him to become aggressive and throw her out of the house.
It gets worse... she believed him! She went round to his house again last weekend. I told her that was not a very intelligent course of action.
I've told her that he is either mentally unstable and needs help that she cannot provide or he is playing some kind of game like testing what he can get away with.
She says she really likes him and wants to introduce him to me... I diplomatically said I was busy but I think I'm going to be asked again.
Any advice? Do I stonewall refuse to meet him and risk making myself look like the bad guy in not giving him a chance? Or do I make a token effort and meet him?

I think he should lay off the drink.
of course he wasn't possessed by a ghost, that's him making an excuse, but he could have a mental health disorder made worse by alcohol.