Problems with school-DELETED

dcems

DELETED .

Thank sunnyone for that

[Deleted User]

the school doesnt sound very supportive,in you position i would make contact with the chair of the school governors and raise your concerns with him/her

sunnyone

dcems wrote: »

My daughter is 15 and is in her last year of school.
In april after a year of tests and counselling she was diagnosed with ADHD and ODD. She also has an eating disorder and is under a specialist hospital for this.

I am having problems with the school. It is a catholic girls school and they dont seem to understand her condition.

The school have been aware for the last 18 months she was under the mental health team. Since her formal diagnosis I have had one meeting with a independent support worker(supporting me) and we had a meeting with my daughters head of year and the SENCO. It was agreed some strategies would be put in place to support my daughter in school, such as extra support during certain subject lessons,time out if she feels anxious etc.

During the last few months we had the stress of her possibily having a brain tumour due to her nocturnal vomiting, and her behaviour at home and school went downhill,including violent outbursts against me. Although the MRI scan was clear, it was an unsettling time.

Since her return to school after the summer holidays, she is having issues with 2 teachers only.One emailed me a snotty email complaining about my daughter's restlessness and lack of concentration during lesson so put her on report(this was against the stragety plan agreed). I was not happy and felt this highlighted pure ignorance from the school on my child's mental health and disability. I replied to the teacher and copied the headmistress into this email. I then had a voicemail message from her head of year(previously supportive) advising bascially my daughter was on report to keep her focused and it wasnt going to change.

I then had a joint care plan review with various agencies involved in her care. The school were invitied but did not attend, I was upset with this as a lot of things have been discussed about my daughters progress and the therapy she is going to need to help her grow into a happy adult.

Since then another incident happened where she swore at a teacher and was put into isolation. This was 2 days ago and not a call or word from the school. I have no communication with them at all. They dont seem to care. My daughter hasnt even seen the SENCO since April which i didnt know. All TA support she was getting has been withdrawn due to funding. All the school want to do is put her down without tackling her disability in a supportive way by actually working with me.

I feel like i am stuck in the middle. I cannot condone my child swearing or being agressive to her teachers, but i feel they are failing her.

I am trying to arrange a meeting now with the school with her physiatrist for after half term to work together with some sort of support package. My question is should i be getting education dept involved? what else can i do before I have a nervous breakdown or my daughter is expelled from the school?

Please, I dont know what to do:(

Has she been under investigation/Ed Pysc/pead etc. since she was young to be diagnosed with ADHD/ODD?

dcems

Shes got ADHD and ODD,obviously a diagnosis given by a medical expert,one of 5 we deal with every 2 weeks.

sunnyone

dcems wrote: »

Shes got ADHD and ODD,obviously a diagnosis given by a medical expert,one of 5 we deal with every 2 weeks.

But how long has she been seeing these professionals?

Any professionals for behavioural problems?

sarlyka

Hi,
I would suggest you contact IPSEA http://www.ipsea.org.uk/
And write to your Local Authority to request a statutory assessment. There is information on IPSEA's website to help you do this. I expect the school and the LA will try to fob you off, telling you your daughter is too old to get a statement but that is not true. The request for statutory assessment is often enough to get the LA to put in more support. If your daughter qualifies for a statement, that will stay with her until she is at least 18 (if in full time education), and possibly until she's 25.

ladychelle

hi sorry i cant help you but jus wanted to offer my support. My son is 16 and has hemiplegia with that come extemely 'grumpy' (yeah right) behaviour and mood. He has undiagnosed oppositional defiance disorder which he refused to be tested for but i have had an online assesment done when they were doing trials with dr robert goodman a few years back which definately point towards it. We recieved no help or understanding about his defiant behaviour and swearing at teachers at school and was in isolation at school most days when he wasnt excluded. like you i dont condone this behaviour and he would always recieve a concequence for his behaviour at home too but this does not help. I hope things do get better for you as i hope they get better for us too. I will be following ur thread

dcems

sunnyone wrote: »

But how long has she been seeing these professionals?

Any professionals for behavioural problems?

I did already say 18 months.

she see's a physiatrist
family therapist
psycho-therapist
anger management
nutrionalist
consultant paed x 2 at local hospital and hospital for eating disorder

Obviously these are proffesionals that deal with behavioural problems,although its not quite as simple as that.
i dont know whether I am being sensitive but I feel some cynicism in your questions.

sunnyone

dcems wrote: »

I did already say 18 months.

she see's a physiatrist
family therapist
psycho-therapist
anger management
nutrionalist
consultant paed x 2 at local hospital and hospital for eating disorder

Obviously these are proffesionals that deal with behavioural problems,although its not quite as simple as that.
i dont know whether I am being sensitive but I feel some cynicism in your questions.

You dont get to your teens and develop ADHD, they are present from birth and become apparent when they are toddlers and are picked up very quickly once they start school so if she was normal until 18 months ago she cant just suddenly "catch" ADHD.

ladychelle

sunnyone wrote: »

You dont get to your teens and develop ADHD, they are present from birth and become apparent when they are toddlers and are picked up very quickly once they start school so if she was normal until 18 months ago she cant just suddenly "catch" ADHD.

if only all things were picked up quickly, it is very often not the case in my experience of getting an ASC (aspergers syndrome)diagnosis. My son who is now 23 was under the child development centre from the age of 2 but despite my concerns was told he was fine. Problems were eveident when they do the educational pyschologist test during the first year of school which they chose to ignore. At the age of 12 we started a series of meeting with a clinical pyschologist, that was mainly focused on me for the first 18 mths. When i had proved to them that i was not the problem at 14 he got a diagnosis.

OneYorkshireLass

dcems wrote: »

I am trying to arrange a meeting now with the school with her physiatrist for after half term to work together with some sort of support package. My question is should i be getting education dept involved? what else can i do before I have a nervous breakdown or my daughter is expelled from the school?

I'd go to the meeting before involving the education department.

When you attend the meeting, try not to let them fob you off - have a clear idea of what you hope to achieve and try and get them to stick to the point.

If you can get hold of some sort of recording device, then I'd record the meeting. You should, morally, ask for their permission to record it. Recording are always helpful to refer back to at a later date. If they don't allow you to record it, ask for detailed notes of the meeting - or if you can, take your own.