The Ultimate Hard and Fast debt clearing mission

ruby_eskimo

I know what you mean Birdie, there are a lot of things that are considered 'must haves' but in reality the only important thing is that you're marrying the person you want to spend the rest of your life with. Oh and the dress of course!

Have kind of come to terms with the fact that we're probably going to have to look at getting married in this country now OH keeps getting me to look at venues nearby. I think he doesn't want to upset me by saying it outright because he knows how much I wanted to get married in Prague. It's just his family keep coming down with various ailments (although his grandparents are the healthiest of all of them!) that means flying even the 2 hours it is there would probably not be advisable.

Also it now means we need to save even more money because there is no way we could do it on the same budget we had for Prague.

shrimpy_80

Ooh yes please Birdie that would be brilliant, I'll pm you my email address.

I also told her I wasn't going to bother having flowers in the church so I think it was a double whammy! At the moment my list of 'don't wants' is much longer than my list of 'wants' - we are saving for a house deposit to so I see it that everything spent on the wedding is coming off the deposit. OH's parents have given us a very generous donation to the pot but we have agreed that will all go towards the house and we will pay for the wedding ourselves, plus trying to save on top. Although this pesky cc debt needs to go first

Well done on the baby group Dinah and glad you enjoyed it

shrimpy_80

I should confess here though that I did spend £30 at the weekend hiring a wedding postbox though! Its a proper Royal Mail one and as my mum worked for the Post Office for 37 years I thought it was quite apt. So that placated her a little bit

Sorry ruby we cross posted - that is a shame about Prague if you had your heart set on it Could you marry there but celebrate here? Or have a smaller wedding here and celebrate there? Hope you work something out that you are both happy with.

ruby_eskimo

It all comes down to the fact that he wants his mum and sister there at the actual wedding (understandably) but they have both developed issues relating to their weight. If they lose a bit then the Dr's are happy for them to fly but they've both turned round and said that they can't be bothered. My dad is a bit annoyed about it really because we're (me and OH) now going to spending MORE money than we would have done, with no input financially from OH's family at all.

Oh and OH's sister knows that I don't want her to be a bridesmaid now. She think's its because she's so "fat". It's actually because she's actually never really been that nice to me!

wendz86

Yes please Birdie, i will pm you my e-mail address too!

Ruby - that is annoying you can't have what you want. Families seem to cause so many issues! Don't blame you on the sister either, i would only want people i am close to being bridesmaids.

Shrimpy - glad i'm not the only one who is not wanting to take money out of house deposit for wedding, is a tricky one!

My Dad booked my wedding car yesterday, is an old ford (can't remember the make). have seen pics and looks good. Need to find one for bridesmaids now.

shrimpy_80

Oh wow Ruby, that's tough. I guess the flip side is that they could have said they would lose the weight but not actually done it, so months down the line you could have booked the wedding abroad, they wouldn't be able to go and then you would either lose money or your OH would have to get married without them. I think I'm trying to find some sort of bright side where there really isn't one to be honest!

Definitely right not to be pressured into having a bridesmaid you don't want. I have only asked my sister and OH's sister (who is lovely) and am not having anyone else. I have read lots of horror stories on the Wedding boards on here about bridesmaids misbehaving! OH's sister came to to me the day after I'd asked her and said very seriously that she'd been thinking about it, and did I want to change my mind because she's much taller than me and didn't want to ruin my photos :rotfl: I told her that everyone is much taller than me and not to worry!

wendz86

My bridesmiads are my sister and two of my best friends and i know none of them would cause any issues. I also have 3 little flowergirls including Poppy who is most likely to be the most naughty lol.

Bless your OH's sister Shrimpy!

N.I.M

ruby_eskimo wrote: »

It all comes down to the fact that he wants his mum and sister there at the actual wedding (understandably) but they have both developed issues relating to their weight. If they lose a bit then the Dr's are happy for them to fly but they've both turned round and said that they can't be bothered.

If they can't be bothered to loose a few lb to go to their son/brothers wedding then its not worth having them there. Your OH won't see it until...oh say the day after the wedding if he's like me. But even i'd have raised eyebrows if my mum/brother said "Nah your wedding aint important enough for me to loose a few pounds so I can see you on the happiest day of your life."

ruby_eskimo wrote: »

Oh and OH's sister knows that I don't want her to be a bridesmaid now. She think's its because she's so "fat". It's actually because she's actually never really been that nice to me!

Well if she cant be bothered to loose the weight to travel then shes not worthy of the role.

I'd say tell them how it is, book prague and then its up to them to get fit for it in time or not. Maybe put it to your OH as an "added incentive" to help them loose the weight so the health problems dont get worse?

Birdie85

I'm sorry it looks like you'll have to get married at home Ruby, such a shame. Especially when it's down to the in-laws bascially not bothering to get off their backsides and do something that will benefit their health. Can your OH say something to them about the fact that their 'issues' are going to end up costing you guys more money just so they can see you get married? Maybe they need someone to make a point of how their self-inflicted bad health impacts everyone, not just themselves. I'm so pigheaded I'd book the wedding abroad anyway and tell them that they can lose the weight and attend... or they can see the photos afterwards!

How sweet of your SIL to worry about your photos Shrimpy! I was the same for my SIL when she asked me to be her BM. I had to wear flat shoes and I still felt like a big bumbling ape next to her and her tiny sister and cousin! I'm not even *that* tall, I just happen to know a lot of tiny people who make me look huge!

It was the first big group weigh-in of our workplace weightloss challenge, I lost 5lbs and came second out of everyone this week (didn't want to say it was due to a massive hormonal bloat last week so I was starting 5lb up anyway! ) but all I could focus on was the fact that the organiser updated the screens in the office saying 'This week's biggest loosers are:...' Loosers!!!! Looser than what?! :wall:

N.I.M

Birdie85 wrote: »

'This week's biggest loosers are:...' Loosers!!!! Looser than what?! :wall:

Looser waistbands?