The Ultimate Hard and Fast debt clearing mission

starnac

Does your local authority offer anti-natal classes Dinah? If so they are good if you want the social side of meeting other mums. Plus I hate to tell you but you will never completely calm the fear of killing your baby! DS is my second one and I still spent last Sunday in tears and rushed him up the doctors first thing monday morning cos of a flippant comment made by 2 other mums had me convinced I was poisoning him! (the doctor very diplomatically told me I was over reacting and shouldn't listen to other people)

ETA Wendz we cross posted about the anti natal classes. Good point about the baby groups. I met most of my "mummy" friends at either baby and toddler groups or at a baby massage class we were offered free.

Dinah93

That's wierd, this is the St John's Ambulance one. I know they do it discounted through Tesco every few years, maybe surestart get it discounted too?

I do have the option of the local authority class, but it's only 3 classes and I'm not allowed to go to an early one it seems and I'm not overly comfortable waiting until I'm 34/35 weeks as I could well be on bed rest/have given birth by then. I can understand why they don't want people picking and choosing when they go on the class, and it is free after all, but I'm worried I'll miss it.

Those mums don't sound very friendly! Very glad he's fine.

archersluck

Okay, taking into account I don't know much about babies...

Mattress - mould can be dangerous can't it and you spend a good chunk of time in bed and could be breathing it in. Do you have a spare room bed you could use for now? Or a bed at your parents you can switch?
I don't think you should buy a cheapo temp one as you're going to want something comfy when you're further along. Then you'd need to upgrade it letter on anyway.
Could you zap the mould with something, turn the mattress over, put a plastic sheet down (handy for when your waters break!) and a big mattress topper to get some distance between you and the mould??


1st aid course - I think I'd say go for it, unless Dinah you do it now and NIM waits until May to split the cost a bit?

ADC - this could wait another couple of months couldn't it? Unless you want him to have more experience incase it snows etc. Would the insurance discount work now or have to wait until renewal, insurers are pretty rubbish with any changes to policies arent they?
Can't you just shout at him and tell him to be slower/more careful!

NCT - Do you have NHS courses in your area you could do instead? How likely is it that you may need a c-section with your health issues? Or bottle feed? As I think they don't focus too much on those aspects.

Pilates - I'd go for it, it's not a huge expense, the breathing exercises are meant to be useful I think, and it should help to relax you and meet mums to be if you don't do the NCT.

:rotfl:at ralph parties!

ETA: Sorry cross posts, and I forgot the car - yes that prob needs looking at, you don't want a big fault developing.

starnac

Dinah93 wrote: »

Those mums don't sound very friendly! Very glad he's fine.

Once you have a baby everyone feels the need to give you advice. Problem is as a new mum you are feeling a little unsure and have quite low self belief. Last week started with DS being sick twice before we left for church. I was on my own with him and DD (DH was at work) and had to get them and me to church on time. After 2 changes of clothes (both him and me) and DD being very slow to get ready by the time I got there I was feeling a bit tearful. People who were trying to be helpful I will admit asked if I was okay and after telling them about him being sick etc one said "my boy was sick after feeding all the time...turns out he was allergic to the milk" then another one says "yes I noticed he was slow to feed the other day too. My child had to have soya milk when he was a baby as he couldn't stomach normal milk". Add to this the major guilt I have that we failed at BF (DS couldn't latch on due to an issue with his tongue, which also causes the slow feeding) and by the time I got to my mum's for dinner I was crying "I've been forcing him to drink something he's allergic to for 2 weeks. What if I've poisoned him?" etc etc.

So just remember to listen to any advice given, nod at all the right places, say "thank you that's very helpful" then ignore it if you don't think it's right :rotfl:

starnac

archersluck wrote: »

Can't you just shout at him and tell him to be slower/more careful!

:rotfl: that would be cheaper!

N.I.M

archersluck wrote: »

ADC - this could wait another couple of months couldn't it? Unless you want him to have more experience incase it snows etc. Would the insurance discount work now or have to wait until renewal, insurers are pretty rubbish with any changes to policies arent they? Can't you just shout at him and tell him to be slower/more careful!

She does, but she tends to be the distraction...thats the problem when you wife looks like Aphrodite.

wendz86

Ahh Starnac - you poor thing, doesn't help you are all emotional after giving birth. You weren't to know!

Does sound like surestart must get a discount on the first aid.

Dinah93

It's already flipped, it just keeps spreading. We're both asthmatic too so it does worry me. We've tried everything natural and chemical to shift it and nothing does it. The spare bed isn't really an option as its a childs mattress (which was already taken from my parents, they're going out to buy my brother a new bed this week to replace his 3/4 size kids mattress, so its not even like we can take his old one.

We could split it I guess, it is 45 miles away though, so petrol will be £20 a run - I think we'll probably just bite the bullet on this one tbh.

ADC could wait aye, he just scared me half to death this morning and I've been having the whole 'don't put it off till tomorrow if it could save your life today' thinking. I shouted at him this morning which meant an emergency stop, he didn't hit anything luckily, but the car is full of spilt milk, and the seat belt cut into my mini-bump which hurts no end and has left me with interesting hip pain. I probably over-reacted by saying 'right, booking this course today' but on the other hand I know if I hadn't yelled to brake he'd have hit a line of cars.

50-50 on how I'll feed, apparently I'll get lots of support to breastfeed which is reassuring. C-section is a real possibilty, but won't know until closer to the time.

ETA: And now I feel mean when he's paying me a compliment, especially on a day I feel more like medusa.

Birdie85

Oh bless you Starnac! I don't know if I should feel relieved or worried that you're still panicky with your second child!

I pretty much agree with what Archers has suggested. I'm sure NIM will be extremely careful when the baby is in the car but get him to do the course in the spring, still plenty of time before baby arrives and a bit of breathing room money-wise.

No idea about the NCT course, I had to Google NCT as I didn't know what it was! Agree that it's a good idea if you do the baby first aid course now and NIM do it in May, you may find that you can teach NIM yourself, have either of you done first aid courses before?

Can the pilates classes be paid on a per lesson basis? No point paying £59 if you then decide after one class that you can't get parked/can't be bothered/weather too bad etc.

starnac

Birdie85 wrote: »

I'm sure NIM will be extremely careful when the baby is in the car

I agree with this. I drive differently when it's just me in the car and when I've got the kids with me.