Ever felt like the poor relation?

aliasojo

euronorris wrote: »

It suggests that they were fortunate enough to have a first class education, a stable home (I'm assuming), and the best opportunities in life.

Isn't that the point I'm making?

aliasojo

efrieze wrote: »

I think that the system in which you are educated makes you have a certain attitude towards achievement and success .....

This is my belief also.

lostinrates

Tropez wrote: »

To be honest, while luck may fall into it, I cannot believe that "luck" is the common factor in the lives of these people and of other successful people, I think it is quite simply desire. Sure, networking at posh schools and universities may help in the short-term but if you want to be successful, by whatever criteria you consider to be successful, then you have to be in it for the long-haul and work at it..

I sort of agree with most of this, but would argue besides all the factors you outline LUCK does have a bearing. e.g. I was very successful in more than one field before I was struck with a life threatening illness in my early/mid twenties. It changed my life, I couldn't continue the way I had in any way, shape or form. I still keep ill health and will never, off my own back, be a millionaire, where as, it was possibly quite likely before. Its the drive to do something...not necessarily make money but to do something, that has seen me start a micro business recently. Even that I couldn't have done without dh's income.


DH and I have made what we have alone, but with the benefit of good educations (him state, me private) and parents who taught us what we wanted...and didn't want...for our futures. That's luck too.

re old boys network, dh hjas an excellent network in the filed in which he works, and yet it was LUCK that got him his interview....his cv ended up, by accident, in front of someone with the same name and birthday but twenty years older. this gey thought it was amusing and called dh for a phone interview (they get thousands of speculative applications each year.) That luck let DH show his hard won worth, and that got him the job.

euronorris

aliasojo wrote: »

Isn't that the point I'm making?

I guess so. But those things only make high achievments easier. They don't guarantee it, and not having them doesn't prevent you from achieving your goals.

If it helps, I benefitted from a private school education from 13 to 16, and I'm in debt. I'm doing alright otherwise, but I'm certainly not well off or high up on the career ladder.

It's also all relative. My neice's said I must be rich to be able to fly over to visit them several times a year when I was last there. I assume this is because their parents haven't flown them out here to visit me. Of course, I'm not rich, but I don't have 3 kids to pay for each time I fly either (and for general stuff, all year round also)!

Are you sure this isn't all stemming from the recent move, and still settling in?

166million

Tropez wrote: »

I think people achieve more if they want to achieve.

The most successful people I know, in terms of assets, are those who have plans, even lists, of things that they want to do and accomplish in their lives. They know how much things cost, they know how much they need to earn to be able to do these things and so they work, hard, at ensuring that they keep the money coming in. Only one of them went to a private school. To be honest, while luck may fall into it, I cannot believe that "luck" is the common factor in the lives of these people and of other successful people, I think it is quite simply desire. Sure, networking at posh schools and universities may help in the short-term but if you want to be successful, by whatever criteria you consider to be successful, then you have to be in it for the long-haul and work at it.

You can read the stories of Peter Jones and Duncan Bannatyne, both of them started with !!!!!! all but both of them wanted to succeed and continued at it until they did and Bannatyne was in his 30s by the time he made his big decision to go somewhere.

I have known people who went to private school and haven't really done anything special - one is a manager at a local supermarket, another cold-calls on behalf of a certain mobile phone company... but both of them seem happy in their lives the way that they are. Neither complains that they don't have x, can't afford x - they just live their lives and for the present, are content.

I will also say that another private school friend of mine is never likely to be a multi-millionnairre given his absolutely awful money management. I had to bail him out last year because he took a payday loan with Wonga, missed the payment three months running.

I always though Peter Jones was from a well-off background

Person_one

In my opinion, if less people were 'driven' to acquire huge amounts of money and were happy with enough to be comfortable with occasional small luxuries, then the world would be a much nicer place.

Having a huge desire to be wealthy is not really a good thing, is it? Better to try and encourage your children to want to do something useful with their lives and that money is not the be all and end all.

There is a millionaire in my family by the way, he's miserable, I'm sure I'm much happier on NMW.

Tropez

lostinrates wrote: »

I sort of agree with most of this, but would argue besides all the factors you outline LUCK does have a bearing. e.g. I was very successful in more than one field before I was struck with a life threatening illness in my early/mid twenties. It changed my life, I couldn't continue the way I had in any way, shape or form. I still keep ill health and will never, off my own back, be a millionaire, where as, it was possibly quite likely before. Its the drive to do something...not necessarily make money but to do something, that has seen me start a micro business recently. Even that I couldn't have done without dh's income.

Personally, I just don't believe in luck in the way that other people do. I understand that things come out of the blue, but I don't consider them to be related to luck, they're just aspects of life that some people will have to tolerate and some people will not.

With that said, all the best for your future endeavours.

aliasojo

euronorris wrote: »

I guess so. But those things only make high achievments easier. They don't guarantee it, and not having them doesn't prevent you from achieving your goals.

Are you sure this isn't all stemming from the recent move, and still settling in?

That's my point though, it makes it easier.

No, that's got nothing to do with this. Two entirely seperate issues.

It just so happens I was catching up on family news and we were discussing how the 'children' of the family who attended private schools and mixed with kids who had high standards set for them at an early age, achieved far more in life generally than the ones who attended the local comp where it was an achievement if you were at school all week.

Whilst I agree people are individuals and as such are able to strive to achieve for themselves regardless of background, I also believe some are more affected by external factors than others and shaping can take place at an early age.

Tropez

166million wrote: »

I always though Peter Jones was from a well-off background

I suppose "well-off" is quite subjective. Growing up, I would have considered my best friend's family "well-off", not so much now...

Nonetheless, Peter Jones, regardless of his background made his millions himself. He was earning his own money in his mid-teens, set up various businesses, many of which actually failed but it didn't deter him and he persevered - he thoroughly deserves his estimated £200m wealth in my mind.

aliasojo

Person_one wrote: »

In my opinion, if less people were 'driven' to acquire huge amounts of money and were happy with enough to be comfortable with occasional small luxuries, then the world would be a much nicer place.

Having a huge desire to be wealthy is not really a good thing, is it? Better to try and encourage your children to want to do something useful with their lives and that money is not the be all and end all.

There is a millionaire in my family by the way, he's miserable, I'm sure I'm much happier on NMW.

Is that what millionaires do?

I always thought people set out to become successful in whatever field they chose to be in and the fact they became millionaires on the way was testament to them achieving their goals. Not that the million itself was the goal. IYSWIM?