Giving birth alone? Doula?

Nicki

peachyprice wrote: »

Oops, I thought he was in a band

He could be! Funny how we all read things in different ways.

Mind you if my husband was in a band and chose to leave me for a month to go on tour while our fourth child was due, to give birth and look after all 4 alone in the aftermath of the birth, he would not be fathering a fifth. With me or anyone else

Ravenlady_2

Nicki wrote: »

He could be! Funny how we all read things in different ways.

Mind you if my husband was in a band and chose to leave me for a month to go on tour while our fourth child was due, to give birth and look after all 4 alone in the aftermath of the birth, he would not be fathering a fifth. With me or anyone else

Yes he is in a band and its a big tour for them, to pull out would not only mean we lose the money from it but 4 others lose out too. Its a bit hard to rearrange 15 or so dates and we don't really want to have to pay the company for monies already paid out if the contract is broken.

peachyprice

Have you investigated a doula any further? Sounds ideal, especially if you can ger someone to be with you after the birth too. Probably far more useful than having a man around after the birth

candygirl

peachyprice wrote: »

Oops, I thought he was in a band

So did I:D:D:D:D

peachyprice

Nicki wrote: »

Mind you if my husband was in a band and chose to leave me for a month to go on tour while our fourth child was due, to give birth and look after all 4 alone in the aftermath of the birth, he would not be fathering a fifth. With me or anyone else

Ah, but that would depend on whether it was his job or just a hobby. With 15 dates, it sounds like he's a serious musician rather than just getting together with his mates and playing a few pubs.

skintchick

I had a doula for my home birth and she was great, she was only a few hundred quid, technically in training but a mum of four of her own and had attended births that hadn't counted under her training. She was lovely and well worth it. OH was there too but he didn;t really help me much, the doula was amazing, and really reassuring for me, telling me what was happening and how I was doing.

I'd definitely have one next time (this time? Assuming bean sticks!) and think they are brilliant. You meet them a few times beforehand and obviously you only hire one you click with anyway, so you'd feel comfortable with her.

Toto

Nicki wrote: »

He could be! Funny how we all read things in different ways.

Mind you if my husband was in a band and chose to leave me for a month to go on tour while our fourth child was due, to give birth and look after all 4 alone in the aftermath of the birth, he would not be fathering a fifth. With me or anyone else

Well, funny you should ask. My husband was on tour (with a band) when my youngest was due (baby number 4). He walked in at 1am and my waters broke at 2am. Talk about cutting it fine.

But, that's the music industry. I was a musician for lots of years too so I get it. There will be no number 5 though, I got him the snip for christmas the same year

emsywoo123

I had a doula for the birth of my DS, and honestly....would never have one again. (doula that is, not baby....although :eek::eek: )

picnmix

I had DD no 2 on my own as again DH was at home with DD1. It was fine, there were parts in the early stages at was on my own in the room, but TBH I don't remember feeling worried by this, once we were at the business stage the midwives were there, and then at the crucial stage loads of people appear and as I remember the room gets quite busy, I remember the midwife asking me if it was ok for a student to come in to observe, I informed her she could march the Marine Brass Band through as I couldn't give a carp! Thinking about it now I think I preferred being on my own, I was a lot less stressed, kept getting angry with my DH during the first birth, but not with the midwives, he still comments now how in one breath I spoke like a demon to him and then immediately turned to the midwives and was as polite as Mary Poppins, think it upset him a bit!

mico62

I had a difficult first delivery and hubby was useless. when things got really bad he literally ran out of the door. 2nd time round we both agreed he wouldn't be present. He dropped me off at 8am (I was being induced again) and got a phone call at 8pm suggesting he returned. He arrived 15 mins after a speedy delivery by which time we were both cleaned up and presentable!