Giving birth alone? Doula?

Ravenlady_2

My OH announced last night that he is due to go on tour the same month our next baby is due :eek:

There is no way around this and it is highly unlikely I could have a section just before he goes.

I have racked my brains and cant think of anyone I would feel comfortable enough to have in the room with me, my sister will be at Uni then, my OH sister will be due around the same time, my MIL will be with her, I have no close female friends and my mother will be looking after my other children and having her in the room would quite honestly be my worst nightmare.

I dont have lot of free cash but could stump up the fee for a doula, has anyone used a doula before?

vroombroom

doulas are around £2k up my way and i think you need to book them from the start of your pregnancy x

when are you due? x

bagginslover

You say you have no close female friends, but what about males? Don't discount them just because they are chaps, if you are very close they could be just the support you need. Its very easy to make sure they don't see anything you don't want them to-Midwife/doctor can 'screen' you with a blanket over your legs, and he just stays up near your head.

I know many ladies wouldn't feel comfortable with male friends being with them for this, but it is an option if they are willing.

Ravenlady_2

Im due in February.
I have no male friends that I would consider letting them with in a mile of the delivery room and I dont think OH will appreciate that.

gratefulforhelp_2

Doula is a good idea, that's what I would do in your situation.

borokat

Are you sure your sister can't take time out from uni to be there?

balletshoes

Do you have to have someone with you when you are in labour? Is it a requirement? I'm just asking, I have no idea.
I had my Mum for ages at the hospital, we watched tv together, then I had my sister for a couple of hours when I was transferred at the last minute to another hospital.

building_with_lego

Are you having a home birth? If so you'll probably already know your midwives, and your mum wouldn't be far away...

kjmtidea

Personally I would rather have no one there, paying a complete stranger to be there whilst I give birth just doesn't appeal to me.

Ravenlady_2

My sister's is starting her first term at the end of January and will be 200+ miles away, It would rather be alone than have my mum there, I would would prefer to have a random stranger picked off a bus than her.

Darlyd

I would rather do it on my own than pay a complete stranger too, the midwife will be there with you. .... Do you know anyone's granny? Can you grab a granny from the hospital to come in with ya? Far fetched I know but ya never know :-)- ...

I know you said SIL is due around the same time, but I am sure she and MIL will be there to support you too, or if SIL baby is born then at least MIL OR SIL could be there. Have you actually asked them?

good luck anyway...